Winter Baron

Chapter Four

Bucky unlocked the door, and stepped in. It was quiet, and felt as though no one was there. He didn't leave did he? Bucky thought, throwing his shoes off. He walked quickly through the apartment. He'd reached the intersection between the kitchen, living area, and hallway. At this point Bucky could see Zemo in his room. He was sitting on the floor with the cat, wearing his peaked cap. Bucky pulled his phone from his pocket. He continued down the hall to his room.
Once Bucky stepped through the open doorway, Zemo froze, and looked up at him. The two were silent for a moment, before Bucky took a picture.
"I can explain." Zemo reaches up to take the cap off.
"You don't have to. I understand that you were probably bored here all alone."
"I wasn't alone, Alpine is here." Zemo pet the cat. Bucky giggled.
"You know what I mean."
"You're not angry?"
"No." Bucky shook his head.
"I mean you shouldn't just go through people's things without asking, but no. I'm not angry. You look too cute for me to be angry." Bucky couldn't help but blush while saying that. Zemo took the cap off.
"It looked great on you." Zemo held up a small wallet sized photo of Bucky.
"Steve gave it to me. He said it was on a file about the winter soldier program."
"It's a nice photo."
"It was taken right after I got my uniform I think."
"Why don't you frame it. Your walls are completely bare, it looks like a..." Zemo trails off.
"A prison?" Bucky sighs. Zemo nodded. Bucky glanced at the window, and noted the Sun was starting to set. He looked at his Phone. It was five in the evening.
"Why don't you get dressed, and we can go to the store."
"We?"
"Yeah. I talked to Sam again today, and he wants to help. He said he may be able to swing
Something for you."
"But it's still dangerous, yes?"
"To take you to a press conference during the day, yes. Sam told me I was right to be worried, but also wrong to keep you locked up in here like a prisoner, which you're not. Not anymore. You'll be with me. It will be fine." Bucky smiled. Zemo nodded, and stood up.
"I'll go change then." Zemo smiled at Bucky, and went back to his own room. Bucky smiled to himself while shaking his head. He picked up the box. Zemo had put everything back neatly where he'd found it, with the cap on top. Bucky put the box back in the top of the closet, however he kept the photo out. Maybe I will frame it. Bucky though, and set it on top of his dresser.
"Hey, Alpine." Bucky squats down to pet her.
"You aren't a good babysitter are you." Bucky whispered. The cat purred, and rubbed against Bucky's legs as he pet her. Zemo came back wearing the same thing he'd worn the day before.
"We need to get you some new clothes too."
"Thank you, James. I don't know how I'm going to ever thank you, for any of this."
"Don't worry about it right now." Bucky walked through the apartment with Zemo behind him. He opened the door, and of course let Zemo out first, before stepping out himself. He closes, and locks the door behind them. Suddenly Zemo grabbed Bucky's jacket.
"Hmm?" Bucky turned. An old woman who lived across from him.
"Oh, good evening Mrs. Jones." Bucky smiled sweetly at her.
"Hello, james. I noticed you brought a friend over yesterday, did you find a roommate?" The old woman asked.
"Oh yeah, I-I did."
"Very good, very good." She smiled. Zemo stepped out from behind Bucky.
"Hello, my name is Zemo, it's a pleasure." Zemo introduced himself.
"It is." She agreed
"I'm glad to see you've made more friends, James." Mrs. Jones said, before excusing herself, and going back into her apartment. Bucky led Zemo to the car. He opened the door for him, and closed it once Zemo was in. Zemo put his seatbelt on, as Bucky got into the car. He started it.
"Why did you tell her your name?" Bucky sighs.
"She's a little old lady, I'm sure it's fine."
"That was risky." Bucky pulls the car out of his spot, and starts driving them out of the complex.
"Alright, I'm sorry next time I'll make something up." Zemo said, looking out the window. They were quiet the rest of the ride. Bucky normally parked far from the store's entrance, but with Zemo's injury, he didn't want them to have to walk far.
"Have you ever been to a Walmart before?"
"No." Zemo shook his head. Bucky stepped out of the car, and walked over to Zemo's side, but Zemo had already opened the door, and stepped out. They two started walking towards the building. It was the first of October, and the weather was still a little warm, but there was a cool, gentle, breeze. The sun was starting to set behind the clouds, creating a sunset with orange, and pink colors.
"This isn't the first time you've been to the states is it?" Bucky asked as they entered the busy store.
"It's not, but I've only been to Washington D.C. I have not been anywhere else in this country."
"Welcome to New York." Bucky smirks.
"It's not terrible when you're not being shot at." Zemo laughed softly.
"I'm glad you don't hate it." Bucky smiles, grabbing a cart. He pushed it past the employees, who greeted them. Bucky smiled, and gave them a small wave.
"The city is quite lovely, but I'm glad your apartment is outside of it." Zemo smirks.
"I pretty much grew up in the city, but it was a lot different then, It was crowded, but it just feels worse now. The business of it I mean, so Sam suggested the more suburban areas. Still in the city, but with less city." Bucky says leading Zemo to men's clothing.
"If there's anything you like, put it in the cart."
"You don't have to James, I can get money to use soon."
"After we get something worked out for you to not go to jail you can. For now I've got it."
"A-alright." Zemo said, and started to look around. I can't believe I brought a Baron to Walmart...Bucky thought, and became worried this wouldn't be up to par with Zemo's more refined taste. To Bucky's surprise Zemo picked out at least three shirts. A light blue, a light purple, and a dark purple button up.
"Anything else?"
"Is that not enough?"
"You might be staying with me for a while, so..." Bucky shrugged, and tossed a white button up into the cart with the rest.
"Alright, that's four plus the one I'm wearing."
"That seems more reasonable for now I guess. Let's get you a few more pairs of pants." Bucky said. Zemo found two pairs of jeans, and another pair of black pants. Then Zemo found some sweaters he liked.
"Feel it, it's very soft." He smiled at Bucky while he ran his hand over the sleeve. It was a thick gray turtleneck. Bucky added the sweater to the cart.
"It gets cold here, so you'll want stuff like this."
"I'm used to cold weather. Don't worry."
"Alright...Oh!" Bucky stopped, and pointed to a black bathrobe.
"Like the one you had in Riga."
"Yes." Zemo smirks
"I liked it." Bucky said, tossing the robe into the cart. Zemo laughed.
"Did you?"
"Yeah, I did." Bucky smirks back at him. The two continued through the store. Bucky turned down one of the pet aisles. He grabbed cat food. Both dry, and wet. Bucky also grabbed kitty litter.
"Any thoughts on dinner?"
"I hadn't thought about it at all actually."
"We could cook something, or pick something up if you want."
"Whatever you want is fine." Zemo smiled, and Bucky sighed. They went down the aisles, and Bucky grabbed water bottles, and Coca Cola bottles. Then he grabbed a box of cheez-itz, gummies, and various other snacks.
"If you see something you want, grab it." Bucky said, as he tossed in a box of double stuffed Oreos. Next they went down the candy aisle. Bucky grabbed a bag of gummy bears, and sour gummy worms.
"Unfortunately I've never come across Turkish delight in the United States before."
"It's alright."
"I'll just get a bunch of stuff, and you can try them." Bucky said as he started to put various candies in the cart, as well as popcorn.
"In case we watch a movie, or something." Bucky leads Zemo away from the junk food. He picks up eggs, and milk. Next lunch meat, and cheese from the deli, followed by produce. Bucky stops, and grabs a plastic bag, then puts about four plums into the bag.
"I love these. Is there any fruit you want?" Bucky looks over his shoulder at Zemo, who was already looking at the apples. Bucky grabs another plastic bag.
"Here." He hands it to Zemo.
"Thank you." Zemo put a couple honey crisp apples in the bag. Bucky also grabbed a few Granny Smiths.
"I think we've got everything." Bucky says as they head over to the checkouts. Zemo yawns softly.
"I think we'll pick something up, you seem tired."
"A little." Zemo admitted. Bucky started placing everything on the counter, and the clerk scanned the items. Zemo noticed a man staring at them. Bucky was also aware of it. Once all the items were bagged, and back in the cart, the two left the store. In the parking lot Bucky noticed the man again. He wasn't quite following them, but he was definitely watching.
"Get in the car." Bucky said, unlocking the doors with his key fob. Zemo nodded, and got in. Bucky put the groceries in the trunk. He left the cart. Bucky didn't want to walk it to one of the cart return locations. He was too worried to leave Zemo. Bucky quickly got in the car, and started driving home. Once they got back, Zemo convinced Bucky to let him carry a light bag, which contained the bread, and eggs. Bucky managed to get the rest. Both arms were full of bags. No way he was going to take two trips now that he was sure that man was watching them. Then take everything into the kitchen, and set them on the countertops.
"I'll help you put everything away." Zemo said as he started to unpack the bags. They put all the groceries in their place, and Zemo took his clothes, and hung them up.
"I'm going to order a pizza!" Bucky yelled back to Zemo.
"Alright." Zemo said once he'd finished putting his clothes away. Zemo helped Bucky pick out a pizza, and they placed the order.
"Now we wait." Bucky said. He sat down on the couch, and turned the tv on. Zemo sat beside him. As they waited Zemo began to doze off, eventually resting his head on Bucky's shoulder. Bucky blushed softly, and wrapped his arm around zemo. It took about twenty minutes for the delivery guy to arrive. Zemo woke up, and lifted his head upon hearing the doorbell.
"Pizzas here." Bucky said as he got up to get the door. He gave the kid a nice tip, and closed the door. Once he was satisfied that it was locked, and secure, Bucky brought the pizza over to the table. Zemo got up, and sat down at the table as Bucky went into the kitchen to grab some plates. He looked over his shoulder, and smiled softly watching Zemo rubbing his eyes. Bucky brought He plates to the table, and placed one in front of Zemo, before taking a seat. They both reached for a slice simultaneously. Zemo's hand accidentally making contact with Bucky's.
"Sorry." Zemo blushes softly.
"It's alright." Bucky laughs, withdrawing his hand.
"Go ahead."
"Alright." Zemo smiles, and takes the slice. Bucky ate the majority of the pizza.
"Are you okay?"
"Just tired." Zemo sighs, taking a third piece.
"You don't have to eat anymore if you don't want to."
"I'll have one more." Zemo smiles reassuringly.
"I'll put the rest away." Bucky said, closing the box, and taking it to the fridge. Zemo finished up, and brought their plates to the sink.
"We can wash them in the morning. You should go to bed." Bucky said, stopping Zemo from washing the dishes. Zemo nodded, and went to his room. He changed back into the oversized pajamas. He went to the bathroom to brush his teeth, and finish getting ready; once he was done he went back to his room, and got into bed. He fell asleep quickly. Of course Bucky went to check on him. He looks so cute when he's sleeping...Bucky thought, before going to bed himself.
~
Bucky was asleep when Alpine started to paw at his face, something she usually did if he were having a nightmare, or if she felt that something was off.
"What?" He groaned softly. She continued to paw at him.
"Alpine, what?" He asked again, still half asleep. She didn't stop.
"I'm fine...go back to sleep." He said, trying to shoo her away. Still she tried to paw at his nose. Bucky turns away from her, only for Alpine to step over him. Once she was at his face again, she started to paw at his cheek. He rolled to the other side. Alpine followed. Next he put the blankets over his face. Alpine started trying to paw the blanket away.
"It's not time for breakfast." He sighs. Suddenly the sound of screaming sent him bolt upright.
"What the fuck!" He shouted out of fear, and shock from the sudden noise. Quickly Bucky jumped up, and ran to the other room with Alpine behind him. Bucky flipped the lights on. Zemo was sitting up in bed, screaming, and arms flailing about.
"Hey, hey, hey!" Bucky said loudly as he sat down on the bed trying to grab Zemo's arms. Zemo appeared to be awake, but his eyes were glazed. He was awake, but he wasn't there.
"Hey, hey! It's me! It's Bucky!" He said not quite shouting, as he'd pinned Zemo's arms to his sides.
"Let me go!" Zemo shouted at him, trying to wriggle free.
"Let go!"
"Zemo, it's me!" Bucky shouted again louder. Zemo slowly came back to reality, and the struggling stopped.
"James!?" Zemo panted heavily.
"Yeah, it's me."
"James!" The tears started falling. Bucky let go of Zemo's arms, and Zemo threw them around Bucky like he had on the couch the night before.
"I'm here." Bucky said, as he wrapped his arms around Zemo. Bucky glanced over at Alpine. Sorry I wasn't listening. Bucky thought, and sighed. Zemo was crying, and shaking. Bucky sat with him, and after about ten; or fifteen minutes the crying, and shaking stopped.
"How about a glass of water?" Bucky asked. Zemo nodded.
"Alpine will stay with you. I'll be right back, and it's time to change those bandages again." Bucky said as he got up, and left the room. Alpine jumped up onto the bed, and rubbed her body against Zemo. He pet her until Bucky came back.
"Here." Bucky handed Zemo the water. He drank it quickly as his throat had gotten dry from screaming, and crying. Bucky leaned over to unbutton Zemo's top, but Zemo swatted his hand away, and quickly scooted back against the wall.
"I'm sorry." Bucky put his hands up to show that he meant no harm. What the hell wee you thinking, Buck? You can't just do that.
"I should've asked first, I'm sorry." He looked Zemo in the eyes. Zemo caught his gaze, and Bucky noticed the fear in his eyes.
"I'm not going to hurt you, I didn't the other day did I?" Bucky smiles softly, and Zemo shakes his head.
"Now come back over here, I need to change that. You don't want an infection do you?" Bucky asked, getting another head shake from Zemo, as he inched closer.
"Is this okay?" Bucky asked this time before unbuttoning Zemo's shirt. Zemo nodded.
"Alright." Bucky unbuttoned the top, and gently began to remove the old bandage. He glanced up at Zemo.
"You're being awfully quiet all of sudden. You want to talk about it?" Bucky was seriously worried about Zemo now. This behavior was abnormal for Zemo, who only shrugged.
"Yes, or no?" Bucky asked again, as he looked at the wound. The area around the stitching is now a light pink.
"This looks much better." Bucky smiles as he applies the new bandaging.
"The stitches can probably come out soon."
"Good." Zemo finds his voice.
"They are uncomfortable."
"I'll bet." Bucky smiles at him, and rebuttons Zemo's top.
"Did you have a nightmare?"
"Yes..."
"I'm not going to force you, but sometimes when you have someone to talk about it with, you feel a little better."
"I-I'm not sure..."
"You don't have to. I'm just saying if you want me to I'm here, I'll listen." Bucky says, adjusting the collar on Zemo's shirt. Bucky sat down beside Zemo again. He pet Alpine for a moment.
"Was it about Sokovia, and your family?"
"Not this time." Zemo shakes his head.
"This time? So you have nightmares often?"
"Yes..."
"Have you ever talked to anyone about them?"
"No..." Zemo said looking down at his hands, which were clasped together. Bucky sighs.
"I never did either, but then people helped me realize by doing that I wasn't helping myself."
"I..." Zemo started. Bucky looked at him. The concern was clear on his face. He wasn't going to force Zemo to talk, but he thought maybe he could get something out of him. Bucky only wanted to help.
"I usually dream about sokovia, and my family, but lately they have been about..." he trails off.
"About what?" Bucky smiles softly trying to encourage him to discuss it.
"I'm...embarrassed..."
"Don't be, you don't need to be nervous about telling me anything, You're doing great."
"Prison..." Zemo sighs. Bucky wasn't surprised, the only other thing he could think of was maybe Zemo's time as a part of EKO Scorpion. Bucky thought about Zemo's response to the possibility of going back to prison the other night. Something happened. Bucky thought. He knew Zemo was reserved, and likely more reclusive than others that may have been in there with him. Qualities like that often attract unwanted attention. In Germany he was around normal humans though, on the raft there were likely people more like Bucky, who would not like Zemo at all especially with his beliefs on super soldiers. The guards however, in both facilities were another story especially in Germany, they were probably not fond of Zemo at all. Bucky wanted to know what happened. Not because he was nosy, or curious, but because he felt something new for Zemo.
He had already called Zemo his friend, to Zemo's surprise, but Bucky meant what he said about Zemo being important to him.
"No one is going to take you back there. Even if Sam can't do anything for you, I'm not letting anyone take you."
"Yes, but that wasn't what the dream was about. It was more like a memory. Most of them are, like the ones about sokovia...can I show you something?" Zemo locked eyes with Bucky.
"Of course." Bucky nodded. Zemo nodded back, and pulled up his sleeves. He held his arms out to Bucky, palms facing up. There were deep scars across his wrists. Gently Bucky took his hands.
"I've already noticed them, I wasn't going to say anything. I knew you would tell me when you were ready."
"When did you notice?"
"While you were unconscious, at my doctor's building."
"I see."
"Did you want to talk about it?"
"Yes." Zemo was surprised with his own willingness to talk to Bucky. Bucky looked down at the marks sadly. Gently he ran his right thumb over the scar on Zemo's left wrist.
"In Siberia, once you all started to fight, and I knew my plan was successful, I left the base. I sat outside, listening to my wife's voice one last time. You see she had left me a message a week or so before, I had promised her, and Carl that I would be home in time for something special we had planned for Carl. I missed it, but I kept the message to remind me to never be late again. I had no idea it would end up being the last message she'd leave me. With the job done I deleted the message, because I planned to join them.
The black panther found me. I apologized for killing his father...not that it would change anything, or make anything better. He said the same thing as the doctor. He told me that I was consumed, he was right..." Zemo's eyes become glossy. Bucky turned to face him, wanting to show he was listening.
"I told him about my family, and what happened to them, before I tried to shoot myself. The new wakandan king, his suit is vibranium, of course. He was able to stop me instantly. It was only a week after I'd been in prison in Germany that I did this." Zemo blinked a few times, as his eyes watered, and a couple tears fell down his cheeks. He thought for sure he wouldn't be able to cry anymore.
"I'm a coward." Zemo smiles sheepishly, looking Bucky in the eyes again. Bucky shook his head.
"No, you're not. Your reasoning is why." Bucky gave Zemo's left hand a gentle squeeze.
"My reasoning?"
"Yes. You lost your family, you probably don't know how you were supposed to go on without them, Right?" Bucky asked, getting a nod from Zemo, who squeezed Bucky's hand as he began to cry.
"I think about them constantly. I couldn't save them! I killed innocent people for revenge! I just wanted to be with them again!" He couldn't control himself any longer, and fell into Bucky's chest sobbing.
"Is that why you wanted me to shoot you? At the memorial site."
"Yes! I've wanted to die for so many years now! I stopped trying to do it myself after that, because it is cowardice!"
"It would be if you were only trying to get out of facing the music for what you've done, but that's not the case. I see you, Zemo, and I hear you." Bucky bit his lips trying not to cry as well.
"Please, James!"
"No, Zemo enough. I'm not going to hurt, or kill you, and I won't let you off yourself either." Bucky said tears are now falling down his cheeks as well. Zemo's hands went up to Bucky's chest, gripping his shirt. Bucky wrapped his arms around Zemo. He was beginning to convulse from crying so hard.
"They wouldn't want this for you, would they?" Bucky asked. Zemo shook his head.
"I didn't think so. They way you talk about them, I know you loved them, and I know they loved you too. It would break their hearts to see you like this."
"I know..." Zemo's words came out as a groan now, as he choked on his tears.
"It's time to move on from this, Zemo."
"How, James. I don't know how!"
"I'll help you."
"I can't feel anything anymore, James. Anytime I do it's only hate, and sorrow..."
"I'll help you, Zemo. I promise." Bucky said holding Zemo tighter.
"If I can move forward, so can you." Bucky sighs.
"I know I was being used by hydra, and that I had no choice but to do the things that I did. I have accepted that. You did some horrible things on your own valuation, but I understand why. I forgive you, but you've got to forgive yourself too. I know your family does." Bucky said stroking Zemo's hair with his right hand.
"We don't have to talk about it anymore tonight, you should try to get some rest."
"Will you stay with me? At least until I fall asleep...if I even can."
"Of course." Bucky lowers his arms, letting Zemo go, so he could lay back down. Zemo did, pulling the blankets up over his shoulders.
"I'm scared." He whispered.
"That you'll have another dream?"
"Yes..."
"I'll be right here with you." Bucky said as he stood up.
"Lights off or on?"
"Off." Zemo mumbled. Bucky turned them off, and sat back down beside Zemo. He was clearly exhausted from crying so much. Zemo closes his eyes. He felt as though the bed beneath him was slowly rotating. Alpine curled up beside him. Bucky watched Zemo as he fell asleep, much faster than either of them expected. Bucky gently stroked Zemo's hair back into place.
It was dark, but Bucky could see well enough to study Zemo's face. He noted Zemo's eyelashes, eyelids, and eyebrows. He rather enjoyed looking at them, especially Zemo's eyes when he's awake. Bucky noted Zemo had a nice forehead as well. There were also a few dark marks Bucky noticed, and found each one strikingly adorable. He scanned down Zemo's face taking in more of his features.
Zemo's nose, and cheekbones; which were set lower than his own. They were rounded, and gave him a younger appearance from certain angles. Bucky's eyes then traveled to Zemo's lips. They were thin, and often reminded him of a cat. Occasionally they made Zemo appear sneaky, sinister, or arrogant; depending on the face Zemo was making. Above all though, Bucky found them cute. Bucky especially liked Zemo's philtrum. Finally Bucky noticed Zemo's chin, he liked the shape of it. He then noticed any moles, or marks on Zemo's face.
Bucky smiled to himself as he couldn't help, but think of Zemo as cute. His eyes once again locked on Zemo's lips. They looked soft. Bucky pressed his lips together, wondering how Zemo's lips would feel against his own. He leaned over closing the space between them and gently planting a kiss on Zemo's temple. Zemo was fast asleep now, and Bucky could return to his room, but he didn't want to leave Zemo alone. Instead Bucky stayed on the floor beside Zemo's bed for the rest of the night.