Book Exchange Romance | A Kim Namjoon FanFic

Chapter 28 - Ana

She woke up and saw Namjoon fast asleep next to her. She looked around and saw she was in the bedroom. How she got there, she had no idea. The last thing she remembered was watching a movie on the sofa, Namjoon's arm around her. That only meant that Namjoon carried her to bed. She reached for his face and traced his nose softly. She memorized each line of his face.

"How did I get so lucky?" She said in a whisper, careful not to wake him.

"How did I get so lucky?" Namjoon said in his deep sleepy voice. Ana chuckled and caressed his face.

"I don't know. But we must have done something good." She said. Namjoon turned his face and kissed the palm of her hand. "I love you." She said. He opened his eyes and looked at her.

"And I love you." He said, caressing her head. He picked a curl and started to twirl it around and played with it. "Can we stay in bed all day?" He asked. "I missed you, terribly." He said.

"We can stay in bed all day." Ana said. Truth to be told, she missed him, just as much. These last two weeks were hell on her. They took a toll on her, and they triggered some traumas she thought she was over them, but it turned out she wasn't.

"I'm not going anywhere." He said, noticing the change in her, bringing her closer to him.

"I know. I haven't been in the best place in these last two weeks. The miscarriage took a toll on me." She said. He kissed her forehead. "I've always wanted to be a mom. I do. I want to have kids of my own, so when it happened and the doctor confirmed it was indeed a miscarriage, I didn't know how to feel. I felt numb. The reality of it dawned on me after I got home. I'm so thankful for Eun-Ae. The first couple of days after, she always came to the apartment to check on me in the morning and in the afternoon. And the same day I had the miscarriage she was the one that got me the new mattress." She said. She looked up at him and he had an unreadable expression. Was he sad? Did he pity her? Whatever it was, she couldn't decipher it.

"I'm sorry." He said. She snuggled closer to him, hiding her face in the crook of his neck. He hugged her tighter and kissed the top of her head. "I should've been there." He said in a whisper. "I wasn't there." He said, his voice breaking at the end.

"It's okay." She said, looking up at him. "It's not your fault. You had responsibilities." She said in a comforting way.

"Promise me you will tell me next time right away. Please. I will get on the first plane to you." He said caressing her face.

"I promise." She said, but she knew that would be a promise she didn't know if she was able to keep. Would she have the heart to tell him? To have him drop everything, all his responsibilities just to be with her? She knew deep down that he would drop the world for her, but could she let him do it? Would she be able to do it?

"Stop." He said bringing her closer. "Don't do that." He said. "Don't overthink for a second that I wouldn't drop anything to be with you when you need me." He said.

"I don't want to be responsible for the repercussions of that." She said.

"Let me worry about that. You just worry about telling me." He said.

"What if this somehow makes it out of these four walls?" She asked worried.

"I'll handle it. Just worry about telling me next time. Promise." He said. She nodded. "Pinky promise." He said putting his pinky between them. She laughed. She locked her pinky with his. "Seal it." He said, motioning to her thumb. She sealed the promise. He dragged her hand to his lips and kissed it. "I love you. I mean it. I love you." He said looking into her eyes.

"I love you too." She said passing a hand through his face and caressing his cheek. She leaned in and kissed his dimple.

"Let's go make breakfast and come back to bed." He said. She nodded. He got out of bed and went to the bathroom and came back out a couple of minutes later.