SEALED WITH A KISS (Taekook)

26

All of them were seated in the dining hall having their breakfast.. Jimin and Taehyung came in the end after their talk. Jin subtly glanced at Taehyung and Jungkook at times.
Jungkook was awfully silent which was quite striking because that boy..when he got comfortable around them was a total dork.. especially with Hobi and Jimin. At times he was even louder than Hobi and would be annoying the shit out of Yoongi. But today it seemed as if he was in deep thoughts. When he excused himself from Jin earlier he went to wake up Hobi and went straight to the balcony. Many thoughts passed his mind along with the shadows of his past...he was not able to come to a conclusion about anything... It was a total mess... He needed to talk to someone about this...but what was he supposed to talk? Even he can't seem to understand his inner voices.

'You ok Kook?' Namjoon asked the younger, bringing him out of his thoughts.

' Yaa Jungkook... You are too quite today.. It feels a bit odd' Yoongi said with a thin layer of concern surrounding his voice

Taehyung and Jimin shared a known look which didn't go unnoticed by Jin

' No no hyung... Am..am fine... Ya.. am really fine' Jungkook replied lightly

' You are telling us or are you making yourself understand that you feel fine?'. Hobi asked

Jungkook looked at him a little bit startled but quickly covered it with a smile and said ' Hyung am really fine'

Silence was never a thing to be found in that household.... they were never familiar with such a situation whenever they were together... All of them felt it odd...or rather suffocating.

' Hyung'  Finally Jungkook looked up from his plate...food still untouched and looked at all his hyungs but avoiding the gaze of a certain black haired male who was the cause of all his confusion.

All of them looked at Jungkook nodding indicating him to continue.

Jungkook took a deep breath ' How does it feels like to be in love?'
All of them sat there wide eyed... This was not a Jungkook thing to ask... Jungkook was always so far away from the idea of love..... scratch that he never ever even expected someone to be by his side and all his hyungs knew this very clearly. Taehyung was totally taken aback by the question but Jimin...Jimin was internally smirking. Now he was clear about every single doubt he had in his mind

Jin smiled and said ' Kook.... Falling in love... It's a completely different feeling... You feel as if you are in a new world.... where the only things matters will be the smile on that one person's face for whom your heart beats. You will be ready to give up even the whole world for that one person.. but Kook... Love is not always about giving.... We receive the love back without anu restrictions.... And the funniest thing is you would never know when you started falling... It's as if you are falling asleep... Slowly and then all at once.
It's a truly beautiful feeling but equally painful... You will understand once you find the one for you.' Jin stopped and looked at Jungkook who was listening very attentively and nodded his head.

Namjoon looked endearingly at his fiance... Even Jimin and Yoongi were lost in his words... All their Beautiful memories flashed in front of their eyes.

At this point Jungkook found answers to all his questions...all his confusions were taken away from him... everything seemed perfectly clear. He should be happy about this right? But no.... He felt hopeless.... Extremely hopeless and pathetic. His thoughts were swirling like a storm in his mind which was triggered when he heard the next question.

' Why Kook did you find someone?' Hobi asked wiggling his brows

' No hyung.... It's just you guys are in a relationship.... And feels good to see you all with your partners... I just wanted to know how it feels like. I didn't find anyone hobi hyung...even if I will ever find...who would wish to end up with someone like me?' A dry chuckle left his mouth as he continued... ' May be you are right hyung... It may be like falling asleep... but you have to wake up and then the reality will hit you right on your face... And that's my truth hyung.... For me it will always be painful...'

' NO'

All of them snapped their heads when they heard the loud deep voice

' No Kook.. That's not your truth.' That's all that left Taehyung's mouth as everyone looked at him...

' It is Tae.... It is. Would you like to end up with a person like me.... A person who doesn't know how to handle stress...who gets a panic attack even in the simplest of  situation...who doesn't know how to interact with people.... Who has been already used and thrown away.... Who is a total fuck up'

Taehyung fell silent...

Jungkook stood up from his chair.. ' See even you couldn't... Am.sorry guys I shouldn't have brought up this topic.... I need to call Jeno to know about today's meeting.. excuse me' Jungkook went up to his room.

Taehyung followed suit but instead went to the garden and sat down on the bench.
Jimin came and side hugged him... Silently pleading his best friend not to slip away again after hearing all those.

Taehyung saw this side of Jungkook for the first time. He knows that the younger is insecure of himself... But today he saw something else in his eyes.....which was still unknown but surely was the cause of feeling a pang in his chest.

Was this my fault? Was Jungkook upset about yesterday? And what does he mean by used and thrown away? When will you trust me enough to tell me about your past Kookie...? I can't blame you right? Even I haven't opened up yet.

Taehyung sighed heavily as he rested his head on Jimin's shoulder.

______________

Jungkook went straight up to his room and closed the door behind him. He slid down the wall in the corner of the room... Clutching tightly to his knees which were brought upto his chest. Tears leaving his eyes drop by drop and a small almost inaudible sob escaped his dry yet plump lips.... Followed by his whole body shaking due to the hiccups leaving his mouth and the stream of tears running down his cheeks. He knew he was again getting dragged down into the endless pit of his dark past but he did nothing to stop it.... nothing to come out of it.

He felt two arms getting drapped around his shoulders pulling him into a warm embrace into which he gladly melted..

' Everything will be ok Kook.... It's ok to cry... Just let it all out... But just know that you are the best version of yourself.'

' He won't love me hyung.... He will never ever love me.. but I do... I understood it today... Jin hyung said it's beautiful and painful...but it hurts hyung... it's hurts knowing that am not the one for him even if I love him endlessly. Why Yoongi hyung...why is my life like this? It is painful...it always had been' Jungkook sobbed into Yoongi's tight hold.

Namjoon and Hobi stood outside seeing the heartbreaking scene in front of them.