Black Pearl

Chapter 65

My first reaction was to yell at Archer. I screamed at him until my voice was hoarse. I shouted awful, obscene things that I never thought would leave my mouth. When he gave me no reaction, I went after James who also dismounted his horse and began unhooking the beast from the cart. None of the men reacted.

Including Leo.

There was not a sigh or a groan or a move to cover his ears. His breathing didn't change. His eyes didn't part. Not even a twitch of a finger or a quiver of his lip. Had he always been so pale? Had he really lost that much blood so quickly? His eyes seemed sunken, ringed in black. I almost moved to touch him but jerked back at the last second. Would one touch be all it would take? Would that push him over the edge, into the world of the dead for good?

Archer materialized beside me. I had been so focused on Leo that when Archer brushed the back of my arm, I jumped.

"I don't want you to live with the regret of never being able to say good bye," he whispered. "I know that this is an awful thing for you to go through, but a lifetime of regret is worse."

"I don't know if I can," I confessed. My chin quivered and I suddenly felt like I couldn't breathe. "Please, Archer. Please, I can't say goodbye. Not to him. Don't make me."

"You have to," he pressed. His arm wrapped around my shoulders, pulling me into his side.

Quaking fingers brushed away tears in vain. More gushed down, though with the rain falling so heavily it was hard to tell if I was crying or if it was the sky. I wished I could have felt them, wished I could have followed a single thought or listened to Archer's words, took his advice seriously. A moment like this, one of my last moments with my husband was not a time for my mind to fall into a panicked, terrified fog. But I couldn't fight it. I was numb to everything aside from the ache in my heart. I so suddenly understood what James had meant.

The fear of death was an awful thing, but watching someone you love die was an unimaginable pain. Being helpless to save them was the worst kind of suffering that could ever be inflicted and I so desperately wished that I had been the one to be struck on the battlefield.

"I- I don't want him in the cart," I managed. "He's a king. He shouldn't die in a fruit cart."

"We can move him under those leafy trees. It will keep him a little drier," James suggested.

"Or we can take him to the water's edge. He won't know the difference between warmth and cold at this point," Archer murmured.

"I'm not a siren. I'm powerless," I said.

"Far from powerless, but even if you were, power does not change where your home is. Take a minute for yourself. James and I will move him and when you're ready, you can say whatever you need to."

I never thought that Leo and Archer would get along. They were opposites. They could never be friends and laugh like Willow and I could. But they were both kings. And they were both warriors. Archer worked to James to lift my husband out of the cart as if he were a god. Their grip was gentle but careful, their steps smooth and slow. I watched as they settled him down in the wet grass on the edge of the now drenched wetlands. James moved away immediately while Archer stayed kneeling for a moment, squeezing Leo's right arm as if they were childhood friends.

If I was in the right mind, I would have thought of Jacob then, thought of how he would never get to say goodbye to someone who had been a brother to him. Jacob deserved to say his final words as much as I did, more than I did. But I had taken that away from him.

James came to stand beside me, clasping his hands behind his back. "Go to him. He doesn't have much longer left."

Though I couldn't remember moving, I must have stumbled over to Leo's form because I was suddenly beside him. Archer bowed his head to me, stepping away without another word. I just crossed my legs gracelessly and fell to the saturated earth. Part of me still expected my husband to open his eyes and laugh at my lack of propriety. He didn't of course. And it was no wonder. When it slipped my hand into his, I was met with coldness and the faint feeling of a rapid heartrate.

It was true. Leo was dying.

Maybe I never read enough books because the words coming out of my mouth were far from poetry. "You know, I always loved your hair." My fingers raked through the thick strands, so curly in the rain. "Whenever we get closer to the ocean it just curls right up. And you've always been smiling when we're by the water. I know you told me stories about how you defeated pirates, how they can be evil, but when I see you swing a blade or wear those royal clothes half undone, I think of you as a pirate."

My fingers traced the side of his face, trying to remember the curve of his jaw perfectly, so that I would be able to recall it in my dreams with ease. "I loved you long before I understood that I did," I sighed. "We both fought it more than we should have, but you were always so handsome and carefree. You were far from charming, but I suppose I liked that. And you were always there for me when I needed you." Now I touched his eyebrows and his nose. "I would give anything for this to be different. When I realized that it was your brother that I killed...Leo, I really thought Atticus was going to murder me that day, but somehow, that would have been less painful then watching you when you found out that I had done it. I wanted so badly for it to be a lie. I wanted so badly to undo all of the grief."

Bending at the waist, I leaned over to press my mouth to his. In my hand, I could still feel a pulse though it was growing fainter. Part of me thought that Archer and James had been wrong, that he would pull through. It would be like that fairytale where one simple kiss would be enough to undo a world of damage. Kingdoms would rejoice. All would be right again. But Leo's mouth was cold and unmoving against mine and when I pulled away, he was barely breathing at all. The wetlands were flooding more now, just like Archer predicted. We were no longer on the edge of the water; it was pooling around us. Maybe it would be enough to lift him from the dirt and carry him down stream, to the ocean. Neither of us had much time left.

I held back a sob. "I know you can't hear me anymore. But I have to thank you for believing in me. You put so much faith in me when no one else would. I hardly trusted myself back then. Because of you, I've come to understand that I don't need to be a siren like Oceana or River to have a place in this world. I owe my survival and my existence to no one. I am whole just the way I am. I just wish that I could have been whole with you."

The water was pooling too rapidly. I had to let him go. I could hear Archer trying to calm the horses, but this flooding was too much, even for them. My fingers slowly loosened on his hand. "I love you, Leo. I love you as a pirate prince and as a king."

My husband was gone. His heartbeat too faint for me to detect.

I let him go and stood on trembling knees.

With a hand clasped over my mouth to cover my sobs, I tipped my head back and looked to the heavens. I sent up a prayer to whoever was there, asking them to take care of the man that I loved as the water rose higher and higher now, covering my ankles.

And just as I was about to turn away, the water began to glow.

~~~Question of the Day~~~

What is your favorite sports team?