Destined for Vengeance ✔️

Chapter 55

Ryleigh's blood ran cold. She must have heard him wrong. This was Austin. This was the man who had asked her to stay. This was the man who had done everything to keep her tied to him. She was the doubter. Not him.

"What?" she said.

"Reject me."

Was it possible she had heard it wrong twice? She tried swallowing, but nothing would pass past the lump in her throat. Not even air. Or maybe her heart had stopped pumping and that was why she couldn't breathe. Maybe that's why her chest felt like it was going to implode.

He rose from the bed. She stared at him, truly speechless. He had what he wanted: no humour, no lies. Her horror-filled eyes spoke only truth. And his eyes did the same. They revealed no doubt. He had thought about this. He had made his decision.

Could it be? This was Austin, after all. Austin never knew anything for sure. He was insecure, easily persuaded. He was a push-over. She had been pushing him to his limits for months and he had never stopped her. Until now.

He had marked her. To save her life, yes, but still. He had marked her. He had made his choice. He had chosen her. For better and worse, all that crap.

"I would reject you if I could," he said. "I'm sorry I have to make you do it, but it's the only way."

What did it matter who spoke the words? It was the fact he wanted it at all. That's what hurt. That's what knocked the air out of her lungs.

"No."

Where had her self-worth gone? Was she going to fall onto her knees and beg him not to discard her like trash? Was she going to make promises she couldn't keep? Was she going to tell him she'd change?

"Why? Surely you see this is the only thing left to us." His shoulders were slumping, his voice was tired – yes, this hurt him too. It wasn't what he wanted, but it was what he needed. She knew he wasn't happy about it. It was a small consolation at best. "You tried rejecting me with the very first words you ever said to me."

"And you stopped me."

"I'm not going to stop you this time."

She blinked. There was no air left in the room. She was suffocating. She opened a window and contemplated throwing herself out of it. It would break the bond just as easily and she wouldn't have to look at him while doing it. The wind caressed her cheeks but it didn't revive her.

"I don't want to do it." There – he wanted honesty and he had it. That was the truth. The full, unfiltered, vulnerable truth.

"You were right from the start. The Goddess made a mistake. People change. We don't belong together. The only thing we're destined for is disaster. You said that. You were right."

"So you just give up?" Her nails dug into the windowsill. Her wolf was howling, struggling to take over. The animal wanted to forcefully mate him. That way, he would never be able to get rid of her. But no. She still had some self-respect left. Just enough to keep standing.

"No. I've tried. You know I have tried. I have. You haven't. I'm not giving up. I'm letting go."

"That's the same thing."

"It's really not. In fact, if you could just understand that there's a difference, everything might be different. If you could just understand that letting go of your anger is not the same as giving up on your kin, you could be happy. But you don't and you never will. I see that now."

Her lips parted, but no sound came out of her mouth.

"I am tired, Ryleigh. I'm so exhausted. You're killing me. I hate to sound dramatic, but it's the truth. The way you have been acting lately is sucking the life out of me. You are so hateful and cruel, and I can't bear it any longer. I have tried to fix you, but –"

"Fix me? I don't need fixing. I'm not broken."

"Yes, you are. Goddess, that makes me dramatic again, but I don't care. You are broken, Ryleigh. You've been smashed to pieces and you've been holding onto the rubble for over a decade. And the worst part is that you don't want to be put back together. You like being broken. You thrive on dysfunction. You think your pain defines you. You think losing your hate means losing yourself, and as long as that is the case, how can you ever love me? How can you love me when all you know is hate? How can I love you, when you don't even understand what that means?"

"You think I don't know what love is?" Her wolf's rebellion had stilled into a quiet whimpering. "I threw myself into a river with a feral wolf for you. I defied my father for you. Is that not love?"

"I don't know. It's something, but it's not enough. Ryleigh, I'm not blaming you. I know you've had it rough. I understand. But you can't have a future if you keep clinging onto the past. I'm done. Look at me, Ryleigh. Look at me. I am done."

She did look at him. She looked at him and remembered what she had seen the very first time she'd lain eyes on him. He had not impressed her much. He still didn't impress her much. And yet there was something about his unruly hair, his gentle eyes, those lips that could make the sun go up if he smiled. There was something about his lean hands, about the way he would hold her. Used to hold her. There was something about the depth of his voice when he would speak to her – back when he still spoke to her like they had any chance at all. Had they ever had a chance at all? She loved him. Goddess, she loved him.

"If, in some dark corner of that troubled head of yours, you have any regard for me at all," he said, "if you love me – really love me – if you do, you will reject me."

How soon would he forget her? Was he going to go back to Julie? Was he going to find someone else, who wasn't afraid to show her soul? Was he going to find someone better? Everyone would be better. She knew herself. She knew she wasn't cut out to share her life. Sharing her life – her heart – meant sharing her pain. And no one could. It was her burden. She was going to carry it alone, all the rest of the way.

"I reject you."

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A/N: I'm making it a double update because chapter 55 and 56 are both pretty short, so you can read on if you're so inclined ;)

Thank you for reading <3