After sex cigarettes // dreamwastaken

XXIX

Minutes turn to hours, hours turn to days, days to to week and within a blink schools started again and were almost at Halloween

"How about we all go as the Scooby gang, patches is scooby"
"I like that idea. Nick as shaggy, clay as Fred, do you want to be Velma"
"Duh! We'll be shaggy and Velma" Ena and I sit around the breakfast table trying to shovel down toast before we have work.
"We'll have to go shopping Tuesday evening" I nod in agreement.

Since the park opened back up we've been fully booked. It's nearly spooky Disney, or whatever it's called, so everyone wants to make up for lost time over the summer.
"Do you ever wonder what would happen if we were different genders" max asks, we didn't hang out much over the summer just a text here and there, though he did make an appearance at clays birthday
"Not really, I guess I like where I am now" he nods cordially "so... Halloween's coming up and me and the Scooby gang are going clubbing you and Adam are more welcome to come"
"Emmmmmm, no" he stops to swallow his bottled water "no, Adam's out erins in"
"Ooo tell me about this Erin" Max goes into the story about how him and Erin met when buying almond milk and how they're live for organic food flourished. Max always preaches about his healthy living but I've seen him scoff down two of those huge churros within 3 minutes. We then discuss they're costumes, we ultimately decide on Batman and robin.

"How's your day been" clay pulls up from the pick up point
"Same old, same old." He nodded, the car ride was mostly quiet. A comfortable quiet.

"Can we get pizza, I'm craving pizza" he nods
"Do you have work tomorrow?"
"No but I have a 8:30 lab"
"So mine or yours" I deliberate for a brief second
"My cars at home so I guess there"
"But... I like my bed" he brings his hand to mine, slowly rubbing circles
"But... I don't like catching a 80 minute bus"
"I'll level with you?"
"Okay" I agree
"Take me car" he acts like it wasn't a big gesture. His $70,000+ car. What if I crash, is he insane.
"I don't have insurance, I don't have the money to repay you, I don't even know how to drive an electric, I don't even like driving" I spew at him
"Relax, insurance takes like 25 minutes max. Well go on a test drive and the car drives itself anyway" he pulls into a lay by "get out, drive me home baby" he says in a weird thick accent
"I don't know clay, maybe I'll wake up extra early"
"Get out of the car" he walks round to my side, opens the door, unbuckles me and basically drags me out. I stomp my way out and around the front of the car and into the drivers seat. "Okay so, hands on the steering wheel and -" I cut him off mid sentence
"I do know the basics big man" he start to laugh "what?"
"No one of my friends calls me that. Okay so put the car in drive" it was a simple little switch thingy on the wheel "here you can control reversing, driving and neutral" he gestures to the dial "then you know how to do the pedals"
"No. Wait what? Pedals?" I quip sarcastically back.
"Are you ready?" I nod and start the car. The drive was so smooth
"Can I have your car? Please" he chuckles. The journey wasn't as scary as I primarily thought.

"See it wasn't difficult was it?" We pull into the driveway.
"I actually really like this car"
He scoffs "yeah you should do, it cost half a YouTube video"
"What?" I shriek "half of one. You play Minecraft"
"Well yeah." He bit his lip
"Maybe you should take me shopping big rich YouTuber" his lips sink into his lip
"You're such a idiot, i literally tried to do that"
"Circumstances change. After I get home from school tomorrow we're going shopping" his eyebrows pinch
"Really? Can't you do it online or take me card"
"Men!" I jump out the car and head inside.

We lay cuddled up, knees intertwined
"So I'll be home for half ten"
"Are you really making me shop with you? Wouldn't you rather have Ava or Ena, even max?" I shake my head
"You can help me pick" he rolls his eyes. I kiss his nose just before he speaks again.
"Can I ask you something" I nod "do you not find me attractive anymore" my face contorts
"What?"
"We've not had sex for" he waits "like in 2 or 3 months, granted we weren't together 1 of those"
"Just because I don't want to have sex doesn't mean I don't find you attractive. I'm just nervous, sex has never really meant anything special before, we had sex what? 6 times? Maybe less. I'm new to this all, I barely slept with Finn, so I just need a little" I pulls me close he kisses my hair before running his fingers through it
"I'd rub myself raw until you're ready" a swelling in my stomach grows, I've never had a boy in my life respect and just understand me.

My first time with Finn was just awful, he coaxed me upstairs at a frat party, I was barley able to walk let alone have sex. I felt a horrible shiver every time I think of it, now, I wish I didn't go. I was only clued in about having sex the morning after, I lay hunched over the toilet dry heaving for an hour, until I had to have a pee, they're was blood all in my pants, sickness flew over me causing me to vomit all of my food and drink up. We never had sex, like mutual sex anyway, the type of sex which involves foreplay and both parties can finish, it was always rushed, he rushed to finish so he could go and probably sleep with someone else. In our months together as a couple we had sex a handful of times, I could actual count on one hand. However, with clay he looks after me, makes sure I'm taken care of, in multiple ways, if it gets messy he'll clean me up, he actually cares about me. I feel complete, satisfied, full with him, he's gave me everything I ever wanted and a hell of a lot more.

I lie face to face, nose to nose with the man I love as I watch his eye lids slowly faintly close, I place a kiss on either of them as I watch him drift off into an imaginary land. I just hope I'm apart of it

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Posted: 12:23
02/12/21