Verkwan//Modern Love

17

Seungkwan was nervously picking at his fingers while sitting on his and Vernon's bed, his knees pressed to his chest while the older boy sat at the edge of the bed.

"Will you tell me what's going on love? I'm not sure what you're thinking but I won't be angry"

"I-I know"

"Then why are you so hesitant??"

"You'll be disappointed"

"Love, just tell me"

"I-I lost it"-Seungkwan mumbled this quietly making his lover raise a brow

"Lost what??"

"Earlier this morning, I-I started bleeding in the s-shower. I-It hurt so much"- The blonde boy couldn't hold his tears back any longer as he began bawling his eyes out. Vernon already getting the idea as he quickly went over to his lover and hugged him tightly, letting the younger cry as much as he wanted.

"Why didn't you tell me love? When were you- I-I don't understand"

"I didn't know either! The doctor said I would've been a month in next week, we could've finally had a f-family and I ruined it"

"Baby it wasn't your fault stuff like this happens a lot"

"It was! It always is! The doctor thinks it was stress, I-I didn't even feel stressed, it was our last day I was just ready to come back home. I-I don't understand, what if I can't have them now?? The doctor said it can happen, it's all my fault"

Seungkwan cried while hitting his lovers chest, it didn't hurt Vernon of course since it was very soft hits but they were filled with so many emotions. He just hugged the younger tighter until he finally calmed down and fell asleep while holding onto Vernon tightly.

Vernon sighed deeply and gently placed his lover down and covered him with the blanket. He wasn't expecting to find out that Seungkwan ended up being pregnant only to lose the baby, while on a trip of all times. He cleaned up his lovers tearstained face and pecked his cheek before leaving the room. His phone suddenly ringing making him flinch but see that his mom was calling, he grabbed a beer from the fridge before finally answering.

"Hey mom"

"How is Seungkwan?? Did he tell you what happened?"

Vernon hummed in reply while sipping the beer slowly.

"He's mad at himself, it's gonna take me a while to convince him that it wasn't his fault"

"I'm sure I don't have to tell you to be patient but just give him some time Hansol"

"Ya I know, he's wanted kids for so long and when he finally gets pregnant neither of us even knew and he ended up losing it and during when he was supposed to be having fun. Was he stressed at all while you guys were there??"

"If he was he didn't show it at all, honestly I think the doctors just told him it was stress so he wouldn't stress himself out trying to figure out why he miscarried"

"Why do you think he did then?"

"Just an unfortunate accident, he's not from our bloodline but the men in our family have always had a hard time being able to start families at a young age that's why it took so long for us to have to just you and Sofia"

"S-so it's my fault??"

"What!? No of course not if anything it'll just take longer for you guys to start having kids. Miscarriages aren't too common in our family so this really is just an accident sol"

Vernon sighed at this while ruffling his hair, he couldn't afford to stress out right now, he needed to take care of his lover which he knew was going to be difficult but this was the boy he planned on marrying very soon so he was going to be as patient as possible.

Vernon sighed while looking at Seungkwan pick at his food. It had almost been a month since the miscarriage and he was only slightly better but compared to the first week he improved a lot. However there were certain days he couldn't even bring himself to get out of bed which made his lover realize that this whole thing messed with him a lot more than expected, Seungkwan desperately wanted kids Vernon knew this but he didn't realize to this extent. Sometimes he'd have Jeonghan come around with the twins and his lover would be really happy but once they left he'd fall right back into his depression so Vernon eventually stopped asking Jeonghan over.

"Love you should eat, I don't want you to lose weight"

"S-sorry"

Vernon sighed and placed his fork down, he didn't eat much of his own food either.

"Don't apologize, I know it's difficult"

"You always end up taking care of me though"

"I don't mind, I'll be doing it when we're married then old and senile"-Vernon said this softly while leaning over and pecking his lovers lips, the younger chuckling.

"Old and senile huh? You'll be the senile one"

"Me?!"

"Mhm! I take my vitamins regularly unlike someone. I'll have a healthy brain and body"

"I take them!"

Seungkwan raised a brow at his lover who just frowned.

"O-occasionally"

"I rest my case"

Vernon huffed and rolled his eyes before standing and dragging his lover over to the couch since they both clearly weren't going to finish their lunch.

"Let's head back to Jeju once we're finally done with school"

"Jeju?? Why do you want to go there? Not that I don't mind"

"Well we only have two months until senior year once we finish next week it'd be nice to take a mini vacation until we have to head back"

"What about work?? Or your family, wouldn't you want to spend time with them as well?"

"Mm, they'll be busy plus I only have three classes for next year so I can go visit whenever I want as for work I'll be taking over in about a month"

"Already?!"

Vernon chuckled and nodded, "I've been training to take over since I could pretty much walk, you'll be marrying a millionaire"

Seungkwan froze at this once he realized what his lover said. "M-marry?"

Vernon hummed in agreement not really thinking about it while his lover was blushing darkly.

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