Originally I was planning to write more parts like flash-forwards so you could see their lives later on but now I'm thinking that Logan and Christian might get a book in the future. I guess we'll just have to wait and see.
Original:
"You forgive me?" I yell "I've done nothing to you. You raped me! You fucking raped me! You don't get to come here and tell me you forgive me after everything you've done to me. You violated me in so many ways and when I finally spoke up about it no one believed me. It tore me up inside until I couldn't handle it anymore. I almost killed myself because of the trauma you caused me," I pause to take a deep breath. "So you can't come here to my school and tell me you forgive me. The only regret I have is ever thinking you were a good person."
Final:
"You forgive me?" I yell. "I did nothing to you. You raped me! You fucking raped me! You have no right to come here and tell me that. You. Forgive. Me. You traumatized me. What you did to me tore me up inside and was eating away at me until I tried to kill myself. And when I told people they didn't believe me. I had to listen to so many people talk about how great a guy you were and how I clearly just regretted sleeping with you. You are a monster. You made me hate myself for something that was never my fault. You have caused me so much pain and suffering," I pause to take a deep breath. "So you don't get to come here to my school and tell me you forgive me. You don't get to make me feel bad about coming forward. The only thing I regret is ever thinking you were a good person."
Here's a comparison of Logan confronting Brandon. This monologue went through many changes as I wrote this book. I would publish it then write a few more chapters then edit it and repeat this a couple of times. I think it took me a while to really capture the feelings I wanted her to express here. She was angry and hurt and it really needed to be conveyed in a way that you could not only see through words but feel.
I almost left Luke out entirely and then would have made his homecoming an extra but I really wanted it in the actual story even if it was right at the end.
Also, I know I really didn't give you guys much of Logan and Christian as a couple and I am sorry for that. I planned on them having a lot more couple scenes but by the time they got together I had decided that it was time for the book to end. I just let the story flow where I thought it should and there wasn't much of a timeline.
XO my lovely readers.
Love, Marie
YOU ARE READING
Logan
Teen Fiction*TW* Contains topics and scenes of sexual assault, self-harm, abuse.* "You know you loved every second of it," I can feel the tears welling up as well as the anger building up within me. I stare at him for a while before I have to turn away from his...
