Tom Holland x reader imagines ❤️

she's not me part 1 (PP)

y/n's POV 

she doesn't love you like i do. she doesn't have my name. however she tries to act like it. she'll never be the same. 

it's been around 2 months since me and peter decided to call it quits. it was for the best i think. well i'm not gonna lie it is hell. i miss him like crazy but i know for sure he doesn't feel the same way as he is now with Liz fucking Allen. i hate her guts. well i didn't always hate her guts as we are literally best friends. well was till she got with my ex who she probably knows i'm not over yet. we don't talk about though because she doesn't give a shit if she's hurting her best friend or anyone. peter on the other hand is oblivious to all that is going on. it's like he has shut his brain off and made everything invisible. we still talk now and again but not like we always used to do which is not what i wanted to happen at all. he swore to me one time that he would never actually leave me but why does it feel like he is actually gone. like he has left my life completely. i want to tell him how i feel but he would just turn his head or get defensive of it. it's hard watching them be all lovey to one another as we sit on the same exact table. i just pretend i'm not there most of the time. i always get dragged into stuff though by Liz. for example like "y/n what do you think if me and peter had matching bracelets"  by the way what she doesn't know is that me and peter have matching bracelets but i have no idea if he has kept it or not. i wish this was different. maybe me and peter would have been back together if Liz didn't come into frame but i guess he wanted something different. 

but she's new and she's beautiful. you've never been in a fight. oh yeah it's awfully perfect now but you just know deep inside. she's not me. she's not me. she's not me baby she's not me 

just sat here in the cafeteria of our school i could feel the awkwardness between me and peter. not knowing what to say as Liz plays with his hair at the side of him. it's like she is scared to let go. "doesn't peter have such lovely hair y/n?" she suddenly says making me want to roll my eyes. i know why she asks me these type of questions. she does it to make me jealous because she ended up with him and i let go of him stupidly.  "yeah sure" i answer not knowing what to say. peter awkwardly smiles towards me making me do the same thing. "petey what do you think of my outfit today? do you think it's too much?" now she is just being a pick me girl. i roll my eyes at her dumb question and the stupid nickname that i know deep down he hates being called. "not all i think you look beautiful" he responds kissing her cheeks making her smile. there is no doubt that Liz is beautiful. she's probably the most perfect and the most beautiful girl in this school. this relationship to me seems fake. well i know it isn't i just wish it was. they never fight with each other ever. me and peter used to fight. maybe a lot. i guess one of the reasons why we broke but no relationship should perfect like so called peter's and Liz's is. it's awfully perfect. i just hope he knows deep down that i am not Liz and never will be. she is not me. suddenly two people who stood behind me snapped me out of my trance. Ned and MJ. brilliant news. "hey y/n would you come sit with us?" MJ asks me. i turn towards liz and peter again to go tell them where i was going but they was too preoccupied with their relationship so they probably won't even notice i'm not there. "yeah of course" i stand up with my lunch and walk with them till we found a seat near the windows of the cafeteria.

does she make you feel wanted like i did. make you feel like you were the one thing that mattered. you let her head rest on your chest but when you close you're eyes. you will be seeing my face again. i'll be crossing your mind. you'll be dreaming of places we went and you will wake up to find that she's not me. she's not me. she's not me remember she not me. 

we sat down and suddenly started to ask me questions and more. "why are you still sitting with them?" MJ asks. "well Liz is my best friend and peter and i are still friends. i thought you guys are still friends with peter? this is all confusing" both of them look down to the floor. "guys what's going on?" Ned takes a deep breath and begins "ever since he's gotten with Liz he's being acting off like not his usual self" what is he talking about? "peter seems fine to me" i shrug my shoulders. "he's only acting fine with you. he literally keeps blowing off poor Ned to go either do spider-man stuff which is obviously normal but we have just found out he's being lying. he's being with Liz every time" yes we know peter is spider-man but that's a long story anyway. this isn't like peter to blow Ned like that for anything if isn't spider-man thing. "yeah that is weird. well they have only been dating for 2 weeks i think he is just getting used to it" i said but shrugged. "i guess maybe but haven't you noticed that he's been very snarky and really down right mean like yesterday when he shouted at the teacher and got his first detention. now that's not like peter at all" Ned explains. wait peter got his first detention? that is not right he's sweet and he would never raise his voice at anyone even in arguments or fights. i turn to see what he was doing. Liz had her head rested on his chest while peter held close with his eyes shut. can't help but hope he was thinking of me while he held her. she is not me. "i'll talk to him" i turned back round to see both of them shocked "are you sure?" MJ asks. "yes" i nod and get up leaving my lunch that I've have hardly touched and walked towards peter. once i was stood at their table i didn't hesitate to speak "peter can we talk" making Liz get up from his chest. he nods and says "sure" Liz didn't look too happy but let him go with me anyway. he gets up and starts to follow me out to the courtyard where the tree that all of us used to sit around and have a laugh at. all i'm hoping is that this conversation goes the way i'm hoping it will and he will realise that 

she's not me