It always ends

twenty

Harper

The process was repeated six times. Which made around thirty rolls. Less, because I kept eating the ends.

I performed the finishing touch by positioning each sushi roll onto a fancy dish then, drizzled Sriracha mayo on them and added sesame seeds on top.

Perfect.

I placed my hands on my hips, admiring my work.

"Looks good," he said from beside me.

I agreed, grabbing two sets of chopsticks from my utensil drawer and two smaller plates from the cupboard. "My favourite cooking show is playing soon, want to watch with me?"

He kind of had to.

He nodded and helped me carry our food to the living room, setting it down on the coffee table. Handing him a small plate and a set of chopsticks, I turned on the television and switched to the channel it was going to be on.

A commercial played and I turned my attention back to him. He was staring at the sushi. "Wait. Don't tell me you can't handle spicy food," I said, feigning a horrified expression.

"Sriracha sauce isn't spicy."

"Oh my god, thank you! See, maybe your presence is actually okay."

"I'm most flattered, you finally realized," he said, deadpan.

With a laugh, I playfully rolled my eyes, looking back to the screen as the dramatic music played, marking the beginning of the show.

I grabbed a plate and my chopsticks and picked up a sushi roll. My attention went to two places, the screen and my food, not to him. I plopped a roll into my mouth and chewed.

So good.

I curled up to the side, leaning against the arm rest as I ate a few more.

Today was absolutely perfect. This, us, him. Everything.

I was still feeling nervous, but happy, nervously happy, about the kiss we shared. It made me feel so many things. All at once. He made me feel all those things. Passion, desire, love: Pain, heartache, dread.

Fortunately, the good feelings were winning. Whereas the darkness slowly dispersed. Fading away with everything else. It was quiet here, no noise.

I was conflicted but I knew what I wanted. Him. It was only up to my mind to figure out what to do with that. I could make a run for it, or I could stay.

I didn't want to run. I think it's safe to stay. My heart and mind were on opposing sides but came up with a truce.

As long as he could prove I could trust him, I'd stick around.

I've learnt my lesson once and I was not going to fall into it blindly. I left him in a dark place. A place I didn't want to go back to. I wanted to be the one to guide him out. I'd stay by his side; I wanted nothing more than to male this work. But if he decided otherwise, if he hurt me, history would repeat itself. And I'd be that fool again. Or I could save myself and walk away, slam the door and never open it ever again. That was a promise.

Though, I did have a hard time keeping promises to myself...

Never mind that, I wasn't going to focus on what's happening now.

I was with him. We kissed and we'll see what happens next.

Chaos was what met me when I focused back on the screen, the main chef was pacing back and forth in the kitchen while the others looked down at a burnt pot of pasta.