The Right Side of Tanner

Chapter 31

Jenna

Waking up in Tanner's arms is easily one of my favorite things of all time. Everything happened so fast, but I can't deny the spark between us. Even my first interaction with Tanner held a certain amount of chemistry. Sure, it was chemistry in the form of sexual tension, but still- chemistry nonetheless.

I have to admit; I was attracted from day one. I tried to fight this thing between us. I tried to deny myself these thoughts and feelings, but the more time I spent with him, I only found myself getting closer to him. The pull to be near him was far too strong for me to fight anymore. So, I'm done fighting it.

Am I scared? Yes.

I've been hurt before, and with his history, I should be cautious. The stories the media have written about him, especially when he lived in Chicago, are certainly concerning. The stories that have been written about him here try to predict how many socialites or models he'll score while he's playing for the Cobras and other things of that nature. It's not something I should just ignore. But, in the months that he's been here, the stories have started to fade. The media seems to have moved on to other targets lately.

Tanner must have bored them. I spend a lot of time around him and the team, so I hear the dirty details of the players' personal lives more than I care to admit. And I can't deny that I listened a little more closely when anyone would bring up Tanner's name in these discussions.

Even when he first arrived, no one could say for sure that he was hooking up with anyone or he was leaving the bar with a new conquest on his arm. It seems the latter would rarely happen. The guys would voice their surprise to one another on this revelation. They expected him to be this hotshot, cocky stud who would leave the bar each night with a new girl on his arm. They thought he'd attract more bunnies to the team.

When this didn't happen, they felt disappointed. As time went on, the guys just got used to Tanner showing up to places alone and leaving the same. I was shocked when I'd hear the guys tell those stories.

If the people who spent the most time with him noticed he didn't fit his reputation, then maybe he really had changed. I was also impressed when I heard what happened during their weeks away when they were traveling for games. The guys were chatting about how Tanner was swarmed with women, and he kept pushing them away, how he said they weren't his type, how he was looking for something different. Then I heard Damien mention that Tanner didn't bring anyone back to the hotel while they were away. I started to wonder if he had someone serious hidden away somewhere.

One day, I heard the guys mention his fling with the Slap Shots bartender. When I heard that, my heart dropped. I started to wonder if she was the reason he wasn't acting the part of playboy. I wondered if they were involved in a serious relationship. I was disappointed with my musings, to say the least. But then, Tanner kept flirting with me. Why would he do that if he and the bartender were involved?

I thought the way he looked at me was special, I hadn't seen him look at anyone else that way, but I could have been imagining it.

I was still battling with my emotions, trying to figure out what to do about my situation with Tanner when I got back from my conference, only to find him crashing on my couch when I returned.

Talk about having a difficult time sorting through your emotions!

I was doomed from that moment on. There was no way I could ignore how I felt with him being so close. It was like pouring gas on an open flame.

Seriously, look what's happened between us now! These last few days with him have been incredible. Not just because of the sex, but getting to know him, having him open up to me. I feel closer to him already than I ever did with Max.

After Tanner admitted his fling with the bartender and his reasoning for it, things started to make sense. I was the reason he wasn't having endless hookups. I was the reason he wanted something serious. I'd only seen him hit on me when the guys went out- never anyone else. He would push other girls away or ignore them completely, and then he started to seek me out for conversation- only me.

He told me he wanted something serious with me, something that would last. He said he wants to keep me forever, and I believe him. I should be scared. I should want to pump the breaks to slow things down, but I don't.

Being with him is fun, invigorating, and sexy. Falling into this thing with Tanner was easy. It feels right- like it was meant to be. And he wants to be exclusive. That makes me giddy.

Tanner Levine is mine. And I am his. Laying here in his arms, I feel safe, cherished, I feel... happy.

Yeah, happy. I am so incredibly happy.

I look up at his face, and he is looking back at me with that look he saves just for me. For his Jenna. He brushes my cheek with his thumb and gives me a soft, slow kiss. He pulls back and smiles at me with his truest, most genuine smile, so full of adoration. It's the smile that makes me melt.

"Good morning, beautiful. Did you sleep well?"

I nod. "I slept perfectly."

His hand glides down my side as he memorizes the feel of my skin under his own. "What would my gorgeous girl like to do today?"

I let out an airy sigh. "I want to spend as much time with you as I can before Lins, and the guys get back tonight. Once they're back, we have to try to keep our hands to ourselves in public."

He looks sad. "Yeah, I guess you're right."

I place a hand on his face and turn him to look at me. I hate that we have to sneak around, but it's our only option until I can figure out how this will go. I don't want to risk our relationship affecting either of our careers. "Hey, it's just for a little while, okay? So, we can figure out how to juggle our personal and professional lives."

I lean closer and try to lighten the mood. "Annnnd figure out how to officially announce that the sexy hockey bachelor Tanner Levine is taken. It'll break so many hearts. Half of New York will be in tears when you are officially off the market."

He laughs. "Well, you know, it won't just be half. It will be all of New York because not only am I off the market but so are you. And when the men of New York discover that the amazing, desirable Jenna Taylor is no longer available, they will be devastated."

We share a laugh as we stay locked in our embrace. Then, Tanner speaks again. "I know we need to wait, and I respect that and the reasons behind it. I just can't wait until I get to shout to the world that you are mine. I want everyone to know, but I'll wait, Jenna. I'll wait for you. I'll wait forever if that's what it takes. Just as long as you know that I am yours alone and you are mine."

He looks lovingly at me. His words nearly bring me to tears. They are beautiful and full of adoration. I kiss him deeply, passionately, desperately. I kiss him like my life depends on it like the world will crumble away if I pull away.

Dating Tanner may be risky, it may be foolish, but something in my gut tells me to give him a chance. With the way he makes me feel, I'm willing to take the risk.

No one has ever made me feel this way. Tanner is digging his way into my heart. And if he eventually gets to it, I don't think I'll ever ask for it back.