Like a Fool - Hyungwonho

14.

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Hyungwon flopped down onto his bed, phone tightly in his hand as his face got buried in the sheets. There was a quiet patter of paw hitting the floor before he felt the other edge of the bed dip down. 

He raised his head, getting a face full of licks from their dog before he managed to put his head back down. He heard the animal whine quietly before it settled down beside him and Hyugnwon eventually rolled onto his back.

He pulled the phone up to his face, seeing a message that Hoseok had sent him, asking if he got home safely. He hadn't replied yet but opened the message maybe twenty minutes ago. Maybe it was a little harsh leaving him on read, especially after declining the countless offers the guy made to walk him home after their hangout.

Hyungwon would have liked that, but he also couldn't risk anyone finding out the truth about him and Jooheon yet. Not even Hoseok, even though it felt awful lying to the kind guy. Hyungwon doubted that Jooheon wanted the fact that they were brothers out at this exact moment in time.

Though, for the first time in forever, somewhere inside him, Hyungwon wanted to stop the act. Spill every single truth to Hoseok; about Jooheon and about the whole friends with benefits bullshit story. He didn't want to lie to him anymore.

Why?

Because it's Hoseok.  At this point, Hyungown would do anything for the older. He'd jump off a cliff if the man wanted that.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Hyungwon muttered to himself, finally texting back a reply to the elder. It was immediately viewed which meant Hoseok had their conversation open. The older started typing back and Hyungwon immediately shut off the display, pulling the phone to his chest.

Why are you blushing?

He reached out one hand to pet the dog on his bed and sighed, trying to calm down. "What am I going to do?" he asked quietly, opening his phone again to see what the other had sent. 'Don't stay up too late.'  with a fucking bright red heart at the end. "You're not helping."

Hyungwon dropped the phone next to him before rolling back onto his stomach in order to bury his face back into the mattress. He let out a loud scream/wail that was muffled thanks to his position, not that it would have mattered, no one was home. His mother would have been on her way up the stairs to ask what was so wrong. The sudden outburst seemed to scare the dog off, though, as it got off the bed and ran out of the room. Hyungwon relaxed his body and closed his eyes. 

Whether he liked to admit it or not, he probably liked Hoseok. The sudden flutters in his heart weren't from an upcoming heart attack, he wasn't having a fever that could cause his face to feel hot nor did he eat anything that would mess up his stomach; Somehow, the fluttering feeling was stronger than any punch to the gut he may have ever received.

Yet he felt all of those things, sometimes multiple at a time, when around the older student. But since when? Or was this just a stupid phase that would pass in a few days? That's what Hyungwon had thought ever since he almost vomited out of nervousness outside of Hoseok's apartment after the cockblocked kissing attempt. But yet here he still was a few days later, whining like a fool.

Sure, Hoseok was good-looking, great, even, and was nice. But did those things warrant a full-blown crush? They were the bare minimum. Good manners were all his mother taught him to look for in a partner. The good looks were a bonus.

Hyungwon had never been the one to advance his romantic feelings, mostly because he rarely felt such things. Not that anyone ever would have liked him back, anyway. He didn't feel the need to or have time for relationships. Especially now, he had to work and study and a sudden wave of emotions shouldn't leave him unfunctional. And he barely manages to keep himself fed so how was he supposed to be with another person.