sickening blame (on hold)

i miss him.

Trigger warning!; implied suicide intentions

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"Dolores, what's happening out there? Why is there so many people near Casita?" Bruno whispered amongst the walls, only for the super hearing Madrigal to hear. Conveniently, she was going into the kitchen just to talk to her uncle. She scurried into the room and leaned against the wall where the family tree picture hung. "Tio [Name]'s house burned down! The villagers evacuated here for safety," Bruno gasped. "[Name]'s house burned down!? Is he okay?? Was he in the house? If he was, did he get out safely? How did the fire even start!?"

"Sort of? But he's safe. Before the fire started, he went out with Mirabel. But as soon as he came back, he went inside to grab something. I heard a conversation between a group of villagers. I think it might be them that started it,"

"God that dummy. What's so important that he had to take that risk to save it? Those villagers had the guts to do that!? They're the real danger to the Encanto. What did [Name] even do to them?"

"I'm not sure. Oh, tio [Name] is coming over right now with tia Julieta and Mama," Bruno hummed in response while Dolores waited by the kitchen entrance. He stood by the wall. Looking through the hole to see his husband whom he misses so much. Hoping to feel better about seeing him okay. Once [Name] came into view, Bruno's lips curled downwards, apart. Nose bleeding. Tore up and charred clothes. Burned skin blisters on his hands. "[Name], come, sit down," Julieta ushered him. Forcibly sitting him down on the chair. "Dolores, will you please help me heat up the stove?" The said female nodded and complied. Shuffling around to turn on the stove. Julieta took out a white cloth from the pockets of her blue apron. Lifting [Name]'s head by the chin and carefully dabbed the blood away from his nose.

[Name]'s head was in a mess. He felt so numb. Tired. Somehow worried. But the items in his arms made him feel calm. At least. He looked up, seeing Julieta's comforting smile. He sighed through his nose. "How's... How's Mirabel? Is she okay?" he asked. "She's fine. She's with Agustin right now. Putting her to sleep,"

He began to feel uneasy. He doesn't know why. Shuffling uncomfortably in his seat. Fiddling the items in his hands. Yet his face was just blank. No expressions. Julieta paused her actions and retracted her arm away. "What's wrong?" [Name] looked away from her gaze. Guilt was just eating him up. Hesitating to speak up. "...I'm sorry- for making such a huge disaster for everyone," he paused. "And causing trouble for the Madrigals. It's my fault," Julieta frowned at him. "[Name], I know that you know that it wasn't your fault. You weren't even there when it started,"

"No, it was my house. My house that was on fire. I probably accidentally left the gas on and- I don't know. It blew up,"

"No, [Name]. Stop thinking like that. I'm pretty sure it was an accidental fire start? No one expected it. Hey, look. Maybe Dolores might know something. Dolores?" All attention shifted to the youngest in the room. Making her squeak. "I heard a group of villagers were planning to start a fire. Specifically... tio [Name]'s house.."

"Expected," [Name] blurted out, seemingly not to care. "[Name]." Julieta furrowed her brows at him. "No. No, this just proves more that literally no one wants me here. No one! They would go this far to get rid of me," He stood up, gently putting the objects on the table. "That's not true. We want you here-"

"Pepa doesn't want me here. Her son doesn't want me here. Your mother doesn't want me here. Heck, even Bruno probably doesn't want me here! My own family doesn't want me here, let alone my own husband too. That's probably why he left. He left because of me," he trailed off, staring at one of the items he saved on the table. A framed photo of him and Bruno on their wedding day. He felt his face heated up, leading up to another nose bleed. Gritting his teeth, clenching his fists. He turned around and pointed to the family tree painting. "Look at that. I'm not even in the tree. I'm not even in the picture. Even when I married your brother!" He swung his arm sideways, banging the wall.

Surprising Bruno behind it.

Dolores yelped, covering her ears from the loud noise. Immediately alerting her mother to rush to her side. "[Name]!" The said male then glared at Pepa. "You. You said Encanto was better off without me. Why did you save me?"

"[Name], what are you talking about-"

"Why did you save me!? That was one chance where you can get rid of me. By leaving me in my burning house! So I can just fucking die!" A harmonized gasp arose. Including the man behind the wall. "I'm sorry," he apologized. His lips quivered. Eyes stinging. Covering his face with his dominant hand. He broke into a silent sob. His hand was smeared with blood mixed with salty tears. "I-I'm sorry- I didn't mean to- I'm just so-" he continued to sob. Julieta pitied him. This whole new side of [Name] shocked her. He was never ever the angry and hot-headed type. Other than when someone talked bad about Bruno. He's always been so gentle, kind and caring. So apologetic and understanding. She doesn't know how he changed.

Julieta walked over to him and gently grabbed [Name]'s arm. Bringing them so she could remove his hands away from his face. "My life's been so hard ever since he left. I just wanted him back. Back to me. Back in my arms. I miss him, Ju. He was my only source of comfort and now he's gone," Julieta only brought him into a hug. Comforting and caressing his back. "Alright, [Name]. Sit down first, okay? Let's get you clean up," [Name] nodded, wiping his tears away with his non-dominant hand. Sitting back down on the same chair. "Here's a clean cloth for you to wipe all that. While you do that, sit still and wait for me to heat up some arepas for you," he hummed in response, letting his sister in law do her thing.