Book 2 The Strongest Knd Of Yearn

Chapter 10 Alfonzo's Confession

"So, how's your boyfriend doing?"

"God Alfonzo you scared the crap out of me! Next time ring the doorbell would you?!"

"I knocked, but I guess you didn't hear because you were too busy talking to Derrick."

"Look Alfonzo I'm sorry. He's my boyfriend. I didn't know he'd be calling me today, I really thought he forgot about me. Anyway you're early, what's up?" Alfonzo waited a few moments before he said boldly,

"Rick I...I have to quit the band. I'm sorry." This was like a kick in Rick's stomach. Why was he leaving? He then asked him why and Alfonzo replied,

"It's because I've been busy with school lately and my grades are slacking off. In fact, since I started the band with you. You know my Uncle Dexter, he'll taser me if I don't keep working hard so I can get into Harvard!"

"Okay, so I guess this means Amanda's quitting too?" Rick asked, again not hiding his humiliation.

"No, she's still playing. She likes you Rick, she likes you a lot. She's all you ever talk about in fact." Rick looked at him strangely with crossed arms. "What?"

"I dunno, you sound like you're not all that happy with Amanda. Last time we met you said she was clingy and annoying." Alfonzo explained she was clingy towards him because her parents were always too busy for her attention. So of course Alfonzo, being the good guy that he was, gave her some extra attention to make her feel needed.

"That's nice of you, I guess. Look Alfonzo, please consider coming back. What can I do to make things easier for you? Make the rehearsal hours shorter? Practice one song instead of three? Should I break up with Derrick?"

"What?" Alfonzo asked, his heart hammering. Why did he say that?! "Look Alfonzo, we both know what happened last time we were alone together. I know you said you aren't gay, and I never said that you were. For me, being gay, doesn't mean that you aren't allowed to have feelings for another guy. It's not wrong Alfonzo." Rick reassured him gently. He was trying to urge Alfonzo to tell him, so he let Alfonzo down gently now. After his phone call with Derrick he knew what he wanted.

Suddenly Alfonzo got all excited and started yelling at him, telling him he wasn't going to change who he was, that he didn't like guys! That his uncle would kill him if he was.

"Why? Is he a homophobic?" Rick asked. Alfonzo looked scared, and told him Dexter thought the world of Rick and was happy the two had stayed friends for so long.

"And that's what we need to be Rick, friends. Okay?" That word was like a bucket of cold water dumping on his head. He remembered they once called themselves brothers, or soulmates. Now they were, just friends?

"Fine whatever. Quit the band, do whatever the hell you want Alfonzo. Just remember something okay? It never does good to keep things to yourself. It only gets worse. A wise man told me this." That wise man was his dad. Alfonzo didn't leave yet, he wasn't looking at Rick, he was looking at the floor. Rick was watching him, trying to be patient now, letting him gather his thoughts, that were so hard to follow these days.

"Fine Rick. You really want to know what's on my mind lately? Why I want to quit? Why I can't seem to find the same spark with me and Amanda?"

"Yeah I do." For a few seconds he didn't speak. Then....

"I...I have feelings for someone. Whenever I'm close to him, I can't think straight. I dream of him too. For the past several weeks I've been so confused. But he has someone else...but something tells me he might have feelings for me too. What should I do? Ignore these feelings? Hide my pain forever? It's no use, right Rick? It's just no use." Alfonzo sobbed at the end, and he left the house quickly. Rick had to have something to hang on to, otherwise he would faint. So, Alfonzo really did have feelings for him. Yes, romantic feelings that he couldn't release because he was with Amanda, and Rick was still with Derrick.