Intertwined

Chapter 9

Lauren's POV

A couple days later

Although Camila is now officially my girlfriend, I still have that huge weight on me. I haven't really taken down my walls completely. I want to be honest with her. I want to have deep conversations with her and be able to talk carelessly. I want to let her in but I can't. There is this suffocating feeling in my chest that just won't go away. My mind tells me to keep her out because in the end I will just get hurt. It tells me that she will leave me. She will stop caring because I'm such a burden on her. My mind keeps on building up on reasons to keep her out but my heart tells me the complete opposite. It tells me that she loves me, she will always care, she will stay by my side. My heart reasons with me and tells me that taking risks is what life is about. It tells me to take this chance, the outcome can be that I learn from my mistakes or that she will change my life forever. It is so confusing. My mind tells me one thing and my heart tells me another. I'm torn between the two and it drives me insane.

Jules Renard once said "Love is like an hourglass, with the heart filling up as the brain empties." It really is. Camila has begun to change my ways. I hear less of my demons and feel less of the hollow feeling in my chest. Sometimes, instead of feeling emotionally drained and empty, I feel joy and excitement. I'm happy when Camila is around, and that is something no one has ever been able to do to me. I don't have to fake around her. She makes me complete.

This is something my heart is constantly reminding me of. I want to let her in but I don't wanna get hurt. I actually want to say I love you without that feeling inside me telling me it was a mistake to say it because Camila will leave me and take my heart with her. I just want peace between my brain and my heart. This war is something I will figure out in time. Camila and I have only been together for a week and a half. We need to slow down and let it set in that we are now becoming one. A relationship is a connection between two persons. That connection is what your relationship is built upon. If you don't take the time to form a stronger connection, the relationship will crumble. I just want us to slow down so that I can feel our connection and make the decision. Should I wait a little longer or just let her in?

I just don't wanna get hurt again. Too many people have left my life saying they love me. I have lost a lot of people that I have loved. I'm terrified of loving. I always end up getting hurt. I don't want that to happen between me and Camila. That would be the last straw. I can't keep losing people that I love. I can't lose Camila.

Camila's POV

I love her. I completely and utterly love her. It has only been a week and a half of us being together. We may only be 18 but our relationship is like no other. I hate how people put timing on how serious a relationship is. Like if you've been dating someone for years now it's serious but if you've only been dating them for a short time it isn't serious and it probably won't last. Well guess what? I love my girlfriend Lauren and we have only been dating for a week and a half. She has changed my life and I'm changing hers. I dare you to tell me that this isn't a serious relationship and that we don't really love each other. I'll bite you.

I'm crazy about her.

Right now I'm driving downtown to pick up something I ordered for Lauren. I just want to show her that I really do care about her and that I love her. I arrive at the place and immediately make my way towards the front doors of the building. I head over to the counter and wait for a worker to attend me.

One comes over and looks up at me expectantly. "I'm here to pick up an order. It's under the name Camila Estrabao." I say to him. He types in something in the computer and then goes into the back room to get my order. He hands me my order and I give him the money. Once I pay him, I head out to my car and start the engine. I go and pick up a few other orders from different places until I have finally picked up everything and am ready to head home. I cannot wait for Lauren to see everything.

Lauren's POV

I was laying in bed staring up at the ceiling with my headphones on. I had had the same song on for about half an hour now. The song never got old no matter how many times I repeated it. It was 'Sweater Weather' by The Neighbourhood. My phone begins to vibrate, interrupting my music. I look to see who it is only to see the name Camz on the caller I.D. My voice is raspy when I answer because I haven't spoken in hours. "Hey"

"Hey Laur, can you come to the park please?"

"Uh, yeah...sure." I say confused. I balance the phone between my head and my shoulder while I change into a pair of black jeans. I put on my converse and then change into a black tank top with a red flannel over it.

"Why do you want me to go to the park?" I ask putting my phone on speaker and setting it on the counter in my bathroom while I put my hair up in a messy bun.

"Because," she replies. I sigh and take my phone off speaker, bringing it up to my ear once again. "Alright well I'm on my way. I'll see you in a few minutes." I hang up and walk into the kitchen where Dinah is. "Hey Dinah, I'm going to the park. Tell the girls I left, k?" She nods and smirks at me. I immediately get suspicious. She knows something I don't. What is she up to?

I get into my car and drive to the park. I park my car and get out. Looking around, I find Camila sitting under a tree. She is wearing blue jeans, a white crop-top. It may be simple but it looks stunning on her. I walk over and sit down next to her. "What's up?" I ask. She looks up at me and smiles. Her hand reaches over and grabs my hand. She stands up and helps me up as well. The look on her face got my suspicious. She is up to something. I feel a tug on my arm and realize that Camila is pulling me off to the empty part of the park. We come to a stop when we reach a shaded area that is surrounded by trees. I look down and see that I blanket had been set on the ground with a picnic basket in the center. Camila smiles widely at me, "For you," she says simply. She opens the basket and pulls out a large container with fruit in it. Then, she pulls out two sandwiches and two water bottles. "I know that this is only the beginning of your recovery so I just brought something small and healthy. I hope it's okay with you." A huge smile appears on my face when she says that. "Yes, it is. I honestly am really grateful that you even did this for me, nevertheless, care about my recovery when buying food. Thank you Camz." I say to her, looking into her big brown chocolate eyes. She smiles and gestures over to the food, indicating that we should start eating. I successfully ate my sandwich and then ate the fruit that Camila split for both of us. When I was done, I chugged down the water and lied down on the blanket. The sunlight shines through the branches and leaves of the trees while the wind made the leaves dance ever so slightly. The sky was beautiful. Blue with big, white, fluffy clouds floating around.

"There is one more thing." Camila announced once she finished putting all the stuff away except for the blanket below us. I sit up and face her, giving her my undivided attention. She pulls out a velvet box from her pocket and opens it. In it there is a necklace. Surprise is evident on my face. She pulls out the necklace and places it in my hands. I look at the heart shaped, silver necklace. On the front of the necklace there are words that read: I'm worth it. "I had that engraved in it so that you'll always remember that you're worth it. Now every time you look in the mirror or are thinking negatively about yourself, look down at the necklace. It is a reminder for you. You're worth it." Camila says while extending her arms out to me and hugging me tightly. I hug her back and then kiss her tenderly until we have to stop because we are both smiling into the kiss. She put the necklace on me and then sits down and stares into my eyes. We begin to lean in until our lips are touching once again. "I love you." Camila says when we break the kiss. "I love you too."