I'm Not That Girl // A. Bridgerton

Oceans Apart II

Dearest reader, a question. Is anything more exhilarating than taking a gamble? For it is often the highest risk that carries the greatest reward. Yet, wager wrongly, and you might find yourself left with nothing but regret. Of course, one can never know for sure whether a wager will make a fortune or ruin it, unless one chooses a more secure pursuit. But as the season continues, the biggest gamblers have yet to truly show their hand. Which leaves gossip in short supply in recent days. In fact, this author can think of no other event that merits a mention. It is worthy of note, however, that the Duke and Duchess of Hastings have yet to entertain callers together. Our newlyweds are no doubt still secluded nuptial bliss. Who could fault them? And who could be surprised if their diligent efforts are rewarded with a new arrival within the year?

"Are your eyes closed?" Violet asked as she carefully led Alina through the halls. It had been close to a week since she had returned to the Bridgerton home and earlier that morning her mother-in-law had swept into the room and was beaming as she claimed to have a surprise for her.

"Yes, they are." She giggled, making sure to take smaller steps to not trip as she was pulled around. They hadn't gone far from her room until they stopped suddenly. "What is it? Can I open them?"

"Not just yet, my dear." Hearing a door open close to her she jumped slightly as she felt Violet's hands on her shoulder, pushing her forward to what she assumed was another room.

"Now can I open them?" Violet stepped away from the girl and sighed happily.

"Very well. You may open them now." Alina grinned and opened her eyes, however her smile didn't last long as she took in the room she was standing in and the beautiful crib sat before. Stunned, Alina moved about the room, running her fingers along the small blankets and toys that had been stationed. "I had wanted to keep my children with me during the night but I thought you might want to use a nursery during the day." Violet explained as Alina came to stand at the crib and spied the small bear that was just waiting for it's new friend. "What do you think? Do you like it?" Alina laughed softly as her eyes began to water.

"It is wonderful." Violet relaxed finally and laughed along with her as Alina glanced up to the older woman and then quickly back down to the bear. "To be honest, I hadn't really thought about a nursery or anything. With everything going on around here I had forgotten that the baby will need a place of his own." The nursery brought the reality of her situation crashing over her head as she realized that she wouldn't be pregnant much longer and would soon have to take care of another life.

"What is it?" Violet asked softly as Alina's smile began to fall.

"What if I am a terrible mother? What If i do something wrong or hurt the baby? I only have a few months left and what if I am not ready in time? I feel as if something terrible is going to happen." Violet quickly moved forward and grabbed her hands.

"Alina, listen to me. Nothing is going to happen. Any mother will tell you they were frightened with their first child and didn't know what to do. But it comes so naturally that you won't even notice." Violet placed a hand on Alina's cheek and lifted her head from the ground. "I will be with you to help as much as I can. But I know you can do this." Alina nodded and sighed trying to take in her words.

"Am I interrupting something?" Anthony asked as he stepped into the room, eyeing his wife and mother. The clear distress on Alina's face startled him for a moment.

"Not at all. Your mother was just showing me the nursery." Alina informed trying to rid herself of her doubts. "Did you need something, Anthony?"

"I was just coming to see if you were feeling well enough to accompany me to the concert this evening?" Alina nodded with a small smile.