𝐒𝐲𝐧 ┃𝐁𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐓𝐡𝐫𝐞𝐞

40. 𝐻𝑒𝑎𝑟 𝑀𝑒 𝑂𝑢𝑡

May 9, 2023

Queen

"Listen to me..."

He relaxed, leaning his chin on his hand as he waited for me to continue on. "Aiden is a great guy," I said honestly. "Truly fucking great, but he's just...not you. With you gone, I forced myself to try and move on. He happened to be there at my lowest points and our friendship became something else."

It pained me to say this about Aiden after he introduced me to his family and friends, but it was the truth. I had just never said it out loud before. Maybe if I were a different girl in a different life meeting him before I met Syn, things would have been different. But in this life...right here and right now, Syn SinClaire was the only person my heart craved.

That would never change.

"I really really tried to let it become something more so I could feel like the hold you had over me was all in my head, but it's not. I love you more than the word 'love' could possibly express and thinking about either of us being with anyone else breaks my heart. So stop thinking about Aiden, and I'll forget about Stella. I just need to know that you're here now...with me."

"I am." He took both of my hands into his and placed a kiss on them. "I'm sorry...for everything that I've said I'm sorry for, and everything I haven't. I'm just so fucking afraid of losing you, Princess. If you knew the person I became after you left, I'm not sure if you'd still be here."

"I'm not going anywhere," I said. "I promise."

He took in a shaky breath and looked down at our intertwined hands. "I hope you mean that...because there's something I need to tell you," he whispered.

"What?" He took his hands out of mine and buried his face in them. I waited a few moments, my heart pounding as the seconds of silence passed. I heard a sniffle come from him and my brows furrowed immediately.

Is he crying?

"Syn." I placed my hand on his arm. His movements were so small that I couldn't see them, but I could feel him shaking. "What is it? You can talk to me."

It was rare to see him cry in general, but this moment felt different than the rest. He just completely broke down. It looked him he was battling with something. I didn't know if it was him deciding whether or not to tell me what he needed to, or if it was because what he said to say was something that would ruin us.

He wiped his eyes and looked up at me with red and puffy ones. His green eyes were glossy with fresh tears and my heart broke into a million pieces to see him like this. I scooted closer to him and wiped his cheeks before giving him a quick kiss on the lips. "I more than love you, okay? Whatever it is...we'll figure it out together."

With a small nod and shaky breath, his eyes returned to the space between us. "I umm," he started quietly. "I've been doing—"

A phone rang in the room, cutting him off abruptly and we both looked around. Our eyes landed on his phone resting on his bedside yet neither one of us moved. Picking up the phone would mean interrupting the one time Syn started to be vulnerable with me.

He reached for it, and I placed a hand on his arm. "Don't answer it."

"It's your brother," he replied. He picked up the phone and stood up from his seat. I blew out a frustrated breath and sat back deflated. Whatever it was couldn't wait a few damn seconds?!

"Okay, Cain," Syn said into the phone as he spoke to my brother. "I'll tell her...Okay." When he hung up the phone, he tapped it gently on his palms before looking over at me. "You need to leave."