Haewon Imagines » gxg

you snapped at her pt. 2

You just lashed out on your girlfriend. 

You just blurted out hurtful words towards your girlfriend who did nothing else but to make sure that you are okay no matter how busy and exhausted she has been... who wanted nothing else but to secure your well-being despite everything that has been going on.

You cannot blame her for walking away. You knew to yourself that you messed up big-time.

You were upset with yourself; you took off your earphones frustratingly and slouched over. You squeezed your eyes shut and pinched the bridge of your nose, trying to think what is the best thing to do. 

You have two options in mind. First is to chase after her and try to persuade her. Second is to give her space, so that she can deal with her emotions and cool down.

These two options come with a downside. 

The first option could lead the two of you into a heated argument because Haewon's judgment could also be clouded with frustration as of the moment. It is completely understandable why she is frustrated with you right now.

Then, the second option could also lead Haewon to get even more frustrated with you, because you did not even try to acknowledge your wrongdoing and apologize for your outburst. An outburst that she did not even provoke yet became the receiving end for it; she certainly did not deserve receiving it.

After sorting your thoughts and weighing things out, you came up with a decision. You got up and grabbed your own car keys to run after her just in case she already drove off.

Luckily, you do not have to be involved in a car chase with her. You were able to catch up with her as she was about to get inside of her car.

"Haewon, hold on!" You called out, making Haewon pause from whatever she was doing. 

Then, she faced you and raised a brow. You walked towards her, nervously reaching out for her hands to hold onto them. 

"I thought that you wanted me to leave you alone, huh?" Haewon grumbled, but surprisingly, she did not shove your hands off hers. She still got her eyebrow raised at you though.

You took a deep breath before you stared into her eyes. 

"I'm sorry... I spoke to you that way. I didn't mean any of those words, trust me..." You spoke sadly, giving her an apologetic look.

"It is just that I was overwhelmed by my emotions. The past month has consisted of a lot of bad days. All my frustrations and disappointments were bottled up. Today sent me to the edge, and I unfortunately made you the receiving end." You paused, looking down guiltily while stroking her hands longingly. You missed how Haewon momentarily frowned upon hearing that you had a lot of bad days — you have not told her about it.

"I know that it wouldn't justify what I did, because I was very wrong. You absolutely do not deserve any of it. I felt horrible about myself. I regret it."

All the while, Haewon was watching you closely. She can see and feel that you were being sincere. That is what matters to her the most.

You were anxiously biting onto your inner cheek, gauging her reaction. 

On the other hand, Haewon heaved a sigh and released your hands, making you feel even more anxious. She noticed that your body visibly tensed up — while you were still looking down. She cupped your chin and made you look at her. 

You locked eyes with Haewon. Then, she caressed your chin up to your jawline where she rested her hand before she mumbled.

"You're forgiven."

You held her hand which was resting on your jawline and guided it to your cheek. Then, you nuzzled up your cheek against her palm.

"However, I would have to remind you that it is not good for you to keep all of those frustrations to yourself then end up lashing out on me... or generally, on anybody else. Aside from it being emotionally unhealthy for you, it also strains your relationships. Despite knowing you so well and being aware that you did not mean any of it, I would still be lying if I would say that I did not get hurt from all that, because it did. It really did." 

"You telling me to leave you alone really hurts, especially that I have been looking forward to spending time with you after that tough month. I kind of figured out that you have a lot on your plate the moment that you walked in, and I only wanted to make sure that you would not have your health compromised as you continue to work on them. At the same time, I was hoping that having a meal with you could fill my need for quality time with you at least a bit by then."

You can see her getting teary-eyed as she opened up about how she felt.

"I am so sorry, Haewon..." You whispered to her ear as you held her into your arms, while she buried her face against the crook of your neck. Then, you comfortingly run your hand up and down her back.

"Believe it or not; I have been feeling mutual. I have been wanting to have you around over the past few weeks, because your presence just makes everything better, my love. I would never want you to leave me; you are my oasis of serenity. In your arms, I found my refuge. I feel terrible for pushing my oasis away." 

A smile subconsciously tugged on Haewon's lips upon hearing all these, and you felt it. Your words effectively warmed her heart.

"Allow me to make it up with you." You uttered, slightly moving away from the hug so that she can lift her chin up, and you can look her in the eye.

"Aren't you supposed to be doing something significant, huh?" 

"Well, I am — and that is to make it up with you." You wiggled your eyebrows, causing her to playfully roll her eyes.

"Seriously, I don't see anything else more important other than that. I love you, but I hurt you badly. I can't act as if I haven't done anything wrong just because you already forgave me. After all, I still have a few days to get the other thing done."