𝘈𝘭𝘭𝘶𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 {To be edited}

❥𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗣𝗮𝘀𝘁 𝗪𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝗖𝗼𝗺𝗲 𝗕𝗮𝗰𝗸 𝗧𝗼 𝗛𝗮𝘂𝗻𝘁 𝗬𝗼𝘂

❥𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗣𝗮𝘀𝘁 𝗪𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝗖𝗼𝗺𝗲 𝗕𝗮𝗰𝗸 𝗧𝗼 𝗛𝗮𝘂𝗻𝘁 𝗬𝗼𝘂

Lola caresses my head as I continue to sob into her lap.

"Fucking asshole." She mutters under her breath. I cry harder onto her lap regretting what I did. Victor did have a right to be angry with me, but I never expected him to become so aggressive with me.

"Shh, it's ok." She whispers and places a kiss on my head.

I sob harder and harshly shut my eyes wishing that I could stop crying, but nothing stops.

The tears don't stop from falling and my breathing still remains unsteady.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Lola asks carefully.

I shake my head. I don't want to talk about it because talking about it would mean I would have to bring up the past.

And I was not ready for that conversation.

"Amara, if you keep avoiding it you will end up hurting yourself more than you already have." She whispers and runs her hands through my hair.

I wipe my eyes with my hands and lift my head up from my lap. I know she is right. I know she is, but it is so hard for me to talk about.

Talking about it means that I have to accept that it happened and I wasn't ready to accept reality.

I take a deep breath before talking. "Lola I-I can't." I sniffle and run a hand through my hair.

"I won't force you to talk about it, but I hate seeing you this way." She pulls me into a tight embrace. I hug her tighter thanking that I have her in my life.

"I-I know. I promise I will try." I pull back and give her a small smile.

She shakes her head. "Do it for you, not for anyone else." She says and I nod.

"My roommate isn't coming tonight so you can sleep on her bed. She won't mind." She tells me wiping the tears off of my face.

"Thanks Lols, for everything." I whisper and she smiles.

"You're my ride or die, remember?" She chuckles and I smile wiping some of the tears under my eyes.

I get up from her bed and walk over to the bed that's across hers. Slowly lifting up the sheets I climb into bed as a huge sigh of relief leaves my mouth.

"Good night, Amara." Lola says.

"Night, Lola." I answer and face my body towards the wall.

I stare into the white wall waiting for sleep to come, but it never does.

Flashbacks of when I was ten race through my mind and my heart begins to beat faster.

I clutch the fabric of my shirt hard as I close my eyes harshly trying to make myself fall asleep.