anon | yeongyu

thirteen

     "beomgyu. i can't stay here." beomgyu looked over at taehyun who was laying on the couch looking dead. "jeez.. so dramatic."

     "no seriously. my moms picking me up in five minutes." he looked over at him with a smirk and snickered. "is mommy gonna pick you up, hm?" taehyun rolled his eyes and got up to lightly kick him in the leg. "yeah, and she's gonna yell at me! i'm gonna get in trouble because of you!"

     "sorry man." beomgyu shrugged as he clicked through netflix on the tv. the younger rolled his eyes and got his few things before letting beomgyu know he'd wait for his mom outside and leaving. yeonjun had left earlier to run errrands, so beomgyu was all alone in his crush's house.

     beomgyu looked at the box of letters on the top of yeonjuns bookshelf. "i wonder if he's done anything to them. should i look?"

     he nodded and pulled a chair in front of the shelves. he stood on it and reached up, barely grabbing it. excited and impatient, he walked back to the couch and opened the box.

     nothing seemed unusual. just a bunch of pink envelopes. he picked one up and pulled out the letter. "lord, my first letter. thank god i've grown." he smiled before flipping the envelope over. said smile faded quickly as he read the back. denying realization of what it said and how badly he had failed despite his diligent efforts.

     he rubbed his eyes and went to look at the other envelopes, flipping through them just to see the same thing. his name written on the back of every single one. every single "anonymous" letter he had sent had his name on it. how ridiculous. "does that mean he knew? he knew i sent them? why didn't he say anything?" he pulled out his phone to text yeonjun but stopped.

     is it right to text him? is it necessary? maybe he didn't say anything because he was uncomfortable. right, why else would he? then i should keep quiet.

he sighed and he looked at yeonjun's contact, contemplating what to do. instead of worrying, he decided to think about something good that had happened to him. he thought about how much fun he was having at the club that night.

"god, that guy. what would i have done if not for hyung." he shook his head and thought longer. he thought all the way to when yeonjun had sat him at a table. then what? he thought.

     sitting down with taehyun asleep next to him and yeonjun scolding him was as far as he could go. after that, he vaguely remembered feeling happy, anxious, impatient, excited, frustrated, and nauseous all at the same time. maybe i was just really sick.