Stranger things

battle scars (billy Hargrove)

TW: mentions of abuse , alcohol, drugs. Read at your own risk.

••

573 days. 573 days of full on torture and agony. 573 days of wishing I was never in this mess to begin with. I couldn't get out no matter how hard I tried. I begged and pleaded but there was no way i was going to be set free especially not that easy. 573 days ago I fell in love with a fool and stupidly followed him into this mess. I didn't think it would be this messy but it is and it's just gotten worse. Day after day new brusies show up , day after day I'm left bleeding on the basement floor while I can hear him upstairs laughing with his friends. However I dont blame his friends they have no idea what's happening hell they dont even know I exist. I'm never allowed around other people ever so when he has company over I'm banned to this damn basement. I was such a fool to think this man would ever love me or love anyone other than his foolish self.

••

I laid on the cool floor. My body ached as I moved even the slightest. Everything was on fire but my body was so numb that I couldn't feel the blood dripping down my face or my sides. This abuse I know I dont deserve because I never did anything wrong he tries to blame it on me but I know better. The coolness of the floor was actually helping sooth my wounds. I put all of my focus onto breathing, it's like I have to remind myself to breathe or if I dont I'll forget and not breathe. I could hear the laughter from above me I wanted to cry out so bad but I know if I did he would only hurt me worse and hurt them too. I could barely make out what they were saying because my ears were ringing from him hitting me in the head. I never wanted this I really didnt I just wanted to love him and be cared for by him but I was foolish to let my feelings take a hold. I didnt seen any of the red flags when we first started hanging out I was to into him to be leveled headed which got me into this mess. I laid on the floor for another 15 minutes before my body was calm and I could finally move. This isnt the first time hes beaten me to temporary paralyze. It's the 3rd time actually. Once my body was calm enough I carefully brought myself off the floor. I headed into the bathroom the only bathroom I'm allowed to use. In the right corner was  a shitty shower then a toilet not to far then a skin with a busted mirror hanging above. Looking at myself in the mirror I was a mess. Mascara everywhere blood everywhere too. My hair was ratty and patchy since he likes to pull out my hair. I sucked in a breath trying to keep my composure. I stripped myself completely before getting into the shower. I showered for less rhen 5 minutes I didnt want anyone to hear me. Once I was clean and in new clothes I headed out to take meds before cleaning up the basement. On my hands and knees I srubbed away the blood from the cement floor. After that I cleaned up the broken chairs and shattered glass seeing as he broke a window. Unfortunately the window was way to small for me to get out of bit the fresh air felt and smelt nice. I looked out the window seeing the beautiful blue sky and the clouds as well as the birds. I'm only allowed outside every once in a while other than that I'm locked in the house. My body ached as I moved and begged me to sit down but I didnt until the room was clean and spotless.  I moved to the kitchen in the basement I began to prepare food just incase he was hungry I know if I didnt he would beat me all over again and I dont think I can take anymore beatings so I prepared his favorite and stored it in the fridge once it was done.  I sat on the couch for an hour before I heard the guests leave I stood up before he caught me sitting , I pulled the food from the fridge and heated it up by the time he got down here It was done. He said nothing but walked passed me grabbing the pan with hot pads. Ignoring me he walked passed me then back upstairs with the food. I sighed in relief once the door closed and locked. I Quitely grabbed some food for myself. I sat on the couch and ate it , the food wasnt bad but wasnt good.