Statehouse Oneshots

Doctor, look into my eyes | Gov/CDC

Spreading my xe/xem Gov propaganda

Was Gov an idiot? Yes. However xe were also an idiot with shit to do.

This is how xe found xemself, staring at xyr blinking mouse cursor, trying to make sense of whatever xe had just read while xyr brain feels like it's physically turning to mush.

Xe felt loopy, tired, and in a good day xe ignored that, but today there was also pain. Horribly distracting pain that bloomed from xyr shoulder and down xyr arm, fading out into xyr chest. Until it got to xyr ribs, which ached considerably. It grew with every passing second. Between that and xyr ever growing headache xe had elected not to move unless necessary. A little hard while working a computer, but xe managed.

Should xe be working? No. Should xe get the injuries checked out? Yeah, probably. Should xe have ever been on that ladder? Who knows. All Gov knows is that xyr an idiot, and quite content to be one.

The memory of xyr latest incidents flitted behind xyr slowly blinking eyelids, brain too foggy to realize and try to stop it, so xe could get back to work. States, (Texas? Florida?..both?) Had gotten a frisbee stuck up on the roof and xe had just happened to be walking by. Naturally, xe were asked to go retrieve it. Xe made a mental note to go on less walks. Then there was the panic at the lossof xyr footing, the crunch of xyr shoulder as xe hit the ground, and the explosion of pain. That stupid horrible pain. His new immortal nemisis. Xe sat in that pain for only a few seconds before xe had forced xemself upright to flash the two xyr classic "Everything is fine and I am the Government don't ask questions" smile.

That was half an hour ago. The pain had only got worse and xe were cursing everything. Absolutely zero work had been done. Xe were far too close to trying to smash xyr head on the keyboard to clear xyr thoughts.

Xyr thoughts drifted back to Florida and Texas. They didn't look like they believed it but who cares, xyr the fucking U.S. Government what are they going to do?

Xyr door snapped open.

"Federal Government of the United St-states."

Ah.

That's what they could do.

Xe were fucked.

Gov swiveled in xyr chair, trying to remain calm.

"CDC, dear, my love, and what so I owe this visit?"

By the tone of his voice, Gov could already tell CDC knew. That was his 'I know you did something wrong' voice. But, all the same, xe could still pretend to be clueless.

CDC doesn't look mad, really. He just looks concerned. Gov smiled at him. He wasn't sure if it was because xe couldn't really think or on instinct.

"Florida told m-m-me you f-fell off a ladder!"

CDC placed his hands on his hips as he spoke. Gov found it cute.

Xe already knew this was the case, there was no other reason to full name xem....xe think..hm- And yet a kind of muted panic shot through xem. Instantly xe were on the defense.

"He did? Well- I mean I did fall off a ladder, but I'm fine."

Xe were fine. Xe were completely fine xe can handle this.

CDC hummed, clearly not believing it.

Gov stood, taking great care to mask xyr pain and walked over to CDC. Something in the back of xyr mind told xem CDC definitely noticed. Xe ignored it. Gov grabbed xyr boyfriend's hands, and tried a nice reassuring smile.