NO SHAME

VII

CW: Abuse

I was lucky I didn't have to go into work considering I had fallen asleep at Luke's a little after four in the morning. I felt bad that I had woken Luke up so late but he assured me that he didn't mind. In all honesty I was truly grateful that he had gotten me out of my apartment because I was terrified of Jake coming back.

Luke told me that he was meeting up with the rest of the band later on that day and ended up inviting me as well. He told me that Calum was super excited that I was going with them and I told him to tell Calum that I was excited as well.

I ended up staying at Luke's house for the rest of the day. Jake texted me that morning asking where I was and apologizing for what had happened that night but I ignored him. Luke and I killed time by watching TV until it was time to meet up with his band. Luke told me that instead of going to Calums, we were going to Michaels house.

I also learned that going to Michaels house meant I would get to meet his girlfriend, Crystal. I looked at her Instagram when I was researching the rest of the band and she was very pretty and seemed very nice so I was excited.

At about 4:00 Luke and I left for Michaels house. During the short drive Luke talked to me about his band mates and what they had planned for the night. Their plans for the night honestly just consisted of hanging around Michael's house playing various games and drinking, but I wasn't complaining.

We pulled up outside of Michaels house after a short drive and Luke parked his car in the driveway. I got out of the car and followed Luke up to the front door of the house. He knocked on the door and the door was opened by Calum. Before either of us had a chance to say anything Calum let out a loud gasp before hugging me.

"Hi Calum," I giggled as I hugged him back.

"I'm so glad he brought you again," Calum said to me.

Calum let me go and I stepped into the house behind Luke to say hello to Michael and Ashton. I smiled and waved at them before Luke went and sat down on the couch next to Ashton. Calum went to reach for my wrist but I quickly pulled it away so he didn't grab the bruises that still stained my wrists.

Luke seemed to notice this and gave me a look of concern.

"Aspen," He started.

"I'm fine," I replied quickly before he could ask me anything. Luke shook his head to let me know he didn't believe me, but he didn't say anything else.

I followed Calum as he went and sat down on the couch next to his band mates and I sat between Calum and Luke. Luke quickly held out his hand when I sat down and I placed my wrist in it. He turned my wrist over, inspecting the bruises quietly.

"Aspen, this isn't ok," he whispered and looked back at me.

"I don't know what you want me to do," I whispered back and ducked my head down to avoid his gaze.

"Break up with him."

"I can't, Luke. What if he actually hurts me if I try."

"This isn't actually hurting you?" Luke asked as he held up my wrist for me to look at.

"Can we just not talk about it, please?"

Luke let out a quiet sigh before letting go of my wrist. We both turned our attention back to whatever conversation was happening around us, getting lost in the laughter that echoed in the house.

-

Pictures of Luke and I driving to Michael's house were plastered all over the internet the next day. Seeing these photos created a new sense of fear and dread I had never felt before, because this wasn't for pr, and Jake wasn't told about this beforehand. This was Luke and I hanging out on our own time, for fun, as friends.