𝙵𝚘𝚛𝚋𝚒𝚍𝚍𝚎𝚗 - Sapnap x reader

Chapter 38

Forgive me.

Sapnap ran away with his team towards where they had hid their horses. He stumbled a little as those single two words repeated in his head, taunting and mocking him at what he did. 

Forgive me, forgive me, forgive me...

The sweet necklace that his lover had gifted him was clicked on around his neck. He had originally hoped it would bring him a sense of comfort, but it felt as though it was choking him, strangling him, suffocating the air away from his lungs and feeding off the guilt in his heart. 

Sapnap knew he wasn't a good person. Whenever he struck or attacked a L'Manberg member, he would never feel a hint of remorse or mercy. 

But when he had swung down his powerful axe towards Tubbo's terrified and betrayed face, he wanted to run away and fall to his knees. 

If he actually killed him, there was no way that (Y/n) would ever forgive him. 

So, he had purposefully missed, slashing his cheek and legs instead of cutting him up and killing him. He didn't want to go any further than that, but his team would suspect him if he didn't so enough harm to the enemy. 

Then came (Y/n)'s screams of disbelief and pain, running in and firing an insane amount of arrows that Sapnap couldn't even count. 

He didn't know if he felt relieved to know that (Y/n) had listened to what he had told her, or the guilt that she had to find out why she needed to do what he told her. 

Sapnap didn't even try defend himself against the shower of sharp arrows, letting one pierce into his arm with little to no effort. It hurt, a lot, but it couldn't have hurt more than (Y/n) seeing her friends all bloody and ambushed on the ground, as well as having your best friend betray you.

He didn't ever want to hear her pained voice ever again. 

Her gift continued pulling a grip around his neck, an invisible hand clawing at his throat and scratching it raw from the inside out. 

How could he wear this? 

How could he wear something so precious that the love of his life had made him, only to harm her friend?

The guilt was infinite, and he doesn't think it would fade anytime soon. 

Sapnap shook his head and focused back on the present. He could show his emotions and regret what happened later; what was most important now was fooling Dream.

Besides him, Punz rode on his own galloping horse, keeping up with the same speed as him. As Dream and George talked in front, Punz initiated his own conversation with Sapnap, taking the him by surprise. 

"You also wanted to talk to (Y/n), right?"

Sapnap felt his heart drop and sink to his shoes. 

Does he know? The fuck does he mean? Oh shit... does he know about us? Or worse, he likes-

"She wore a necklace that reminded me of someone who helped lead the SMP into power."

...what?

"I.. I wish I could explain more, but I want to talk to her to find out more about this whole thing. She usually wears her sapphire necklace everywhere she goes, but she hasn't been wearing it lately at all. If she lost it, then... then I can't continue my research. That's why you wanted to talk to her too, right?" Punz asked, his grip on his reigns tightening. 

Sapnap simply nodded, scared his words would fumble over each other and give him away. 

And at last, the boy looked at Eret.