Wala ako sarili ng lumabas ako sa private room ng restaurant. Nang makalabas ako ay agad ko nakita si Percival na nagbabasa ng coding sa kanyang libro. He fond of law books but I have no idea why he chose Med when he's into law.
Nang magkasalubong ang aming mga mata ay agad siyang tumayo at mabilis na niligpit ang kanyang mga gamit habang naglalakad ako patungo sa kanya.
When I reached him, I immediately hug him. I cried so bad. I cried while remembering my darkest and painful past.
"What happened, love?" nasasaktan niyang tanong. Naramdaman ko ang pagyakap niya ng pabalik, sobrang higpit na para bang gusto hilomin lahat ng sakit.
"I'm not healed. I'm still not okay. After all those years, I'm still wounded." akala ko kapag nagawa ko na ang mga pangarap ko, kapag naabot ko na ang bituin ko sasaya na ako. Maghihilom na ako. Pero mali.
"It takes time, love. Sana huwag mo pilitin ang sarili mo na maghilom agad. Every anger has story of pain, and every wounds has a story of survival. I have no idea what you've been through and you become a wounded star, but baby please hang on. Healing takes time, at handa ako samahan ka," he genuinely said. Mas niyakap ko pa siya ng mahigpit.
In the midst of the crowd, we are hugging each other like our life is depend on it.
I slowly nodded my head and face him. "After a years of hurting myself, I realized that I want to heal." tinulugan niya ako sa pagpunas ng aking mga luha gamit ang kanyang malalaking daliri. "I want to heal. I want to seek for professional help," determinado kong sabi.
Ang mapupungay niyang mga mata ay agad na tumango. "I'll go with you, in every session and in every possible way. Hindi kita iiwan, pangako." he assured me.
I don't believe in 'promise' word because I can't remember how many people promise me but ends up hurting me. Pero kung siya lang naman, handa ako magtiwala.
He entwined our hands as we walked outside the restaurant. Inalalayan niyo ako makasakay sa kanyang kotse.
"What did he offer you, if you don't mind?" buong pag-iingat niyang tanong. Kahit nakatuon ang kanyang singkit na mga mata sa labas ng sasakyan ay hindi ko maiwasan napansin ang pag-galaw ng kanyang panga. He is angry but he chose to be understanding.
"To write a certain genre that trigger my past,"
Tumingin ako sa bintana dahil hindi ko nakakaya ang tensyon.
"Drop his offer." utos niya. His voice is dangerous and huskily.
Agad akong umiling na nagpa-salubong sa kanyang mga kilay. "I need the money for my law school. Kahit Political Science lang ang kinuha ko magastos parin. Sa pagsusulat ako kumukuha ng pera na bubuhay sa akin. I need that money to pursue my dream as lawyer,"
Kung pwede lang 'wag na magsulat kung masasaktan lang ako. Pero kailangan, eh. Kailangan ko para sa kinabukasan ko.
Mahirap maging mahirap, sobra.
"Papahiramin muna kita ng pera. You can work in our hospital if you want. I will support you in anything and everything as long that its not affecting your mental health. You are my top priority now, Shein." ang mga salita niya ay punong-puno ng pag-aalala.
I rested my hand to his leeg to calm him.
"I'm okay. I will be okay, eventually. Hindi ba mas tatapang at magiging okay ka kapag sinabi mo ang mga bagay na nakakasakit sa'yo? It takes guts to tell to the world what makes you hurt." I also assured him.
Hinayaan ko na lang siya kung saan kami patutungo. He just starring at me when he got a chance. Bakas parin sa gwapo niyang mukha ang pag-aalala. Nang makarating kami sa isang clinic ay agad niya ako inalalayan na makababa.
Ang kanyang aura ay bakas ang awatoridad. Pumasok kami at sinalubong ng mga assistant nurses. Lahat sila ay kinakabahan habang nakatingin sa masungit na awra ni Percival.
"Nasaan si Doc. Navarro?" he asked in the nurses.
"In his office, Sir." magalang na tugon ng isang nurse. Agad naman masuyo akong hinili ni Percival patungo sa sinasabing office.
I know that this is one of their branches that focus on mental health.
"He is our best doctor. Kapag licensed doctor na ako, ako na mismo ang gagamot sa'yo. Gusto ko man hintayin mo ako, your mental health is more important than anything for me." he whispered.
Nasa harapan na kami ng officer ni Doc. Navarro ng iwan niya ako. I want a honest talk with my psychologist. Pumasok ako sa loob at agad sa akin sumalubong ang mabait na doctor.
"Goood morning, doc," I greeted her. Mailawalas siyang ngumiti.
"Shall we start your healing process?" she asked, hopefully.
I nodded my head and started our session.
Hanggang sa dumaan ang mga buwan at magpatuloy pa ako sa session ko bago magsulat ng bagong libro, the crime story. I told her everything and she never judged me. At ang bigat at sakit ay nabawasan.
"Nasabi mo na ba ito kay Percival?" my psychologist asked aftet 3 months of sessions.
Umiling ako. "I haven't told him but maybe one of this day."
Tumango siya. Nang matapos kami ay agad akong lumabas at bumungad sa akin si Percival. Nakahandusay siya sa upuan habang ginagawa ang school paper niya sa med school. Bigla ako sa kanya naawa sa kalagayan niya habang hinihintay ako.
"Love," he smiled.
Somehow, nasanay na ako sa tawag niya.
He stand up and hugged me tightly. "You did a great job. I'm so proud of you." he is genuinely smiling at me.
In my 3 months of session he never left. Lagi niya ako hinihintay kahit madami ang school works niya. And he never failed to ace his exam.
Hinihatid niya ako sa aking condo. He kissed my forehead. "You are worth it. I love you," he said, passionately.
Tumango lang ako sa kanya. When he left, I went to my study table and started to write in the blank page of my laptop.
'Title: Teardrops of Justice '
My own crime story. How I so called 'killed my sister' and fight for justice in the young age. The book that has been a testimony of my innocence and the point of view of my tragic past.
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Teardrops Of Justice (Under PIP Collab) ✔️
Mystère / Thriller#2| WICKED WRITERS SERIES| A COLLABORATION Shein is writer who write about fairytale but ends up writing her own crime. At the age of 7 she face the cruelty of being allegedly killer of her own sister. But what if in the midst of lost and chaos she...
