Elsewhere. | A Lizkook AU

29.

His heart is pounding in a senseless rhythm. He's been buying his own time...delaying this matter for two and a half weeks now. Jungkook allowed himself to stand back and watch as Lisa folded and hung her clothes neatly into his closet. He helped her unpack the books she brought on his shelves and already lets her accommodate a space for a dresser. 

They've been shopping for groceries together every 3 days and made love almost every night now, but he has yet to give her the big, clear picture of what the future might be. Hearing her calling the pups their 'kids' and staring down at her admiring gaze just now made him realize something important. 

She said she's the lucky one...I wish she is...

Jungkook knew the longer he lets it float, the harder it might be for her to accept it. All this while, he thought asking for a hand in marriage will be the hardest spill...but this is ten time harder and it's simply because he can't afford to lose her.

"What is it?" She hugs him from behind since he couldn't face her while constructing his words carefully. Her hands roam, trying to sooth the tension across his shoulders.

"I um...I know I need to be honest with you but um..." She'll probably run again. No, definitely. She ran over my shitty 'destiny' talk - she'll definitely run over this!

"You're shaking," She stopped and swiftly got off the bed. "Did you cheat?" What? "Are you kissing another woman? Is that it?"

"No! That's not - no!!" It's disturbing how she thinks I can even do that - "Have I not been clear on who I've been crazy about??"

Her frown softened and she came forward to sit on the floor, kneeling close and looking up to him. "Then why are you so nervous?"

"It's..." Jeez...how can I talk about something so major if she's like this?? "Can you sit next to me instead? You...in that position..." ...is fucking dangerous, that's what!

She chuckled lightly before getting up, sitting beside him on the foot of the bed. He knew she'd tease him about it if she chooses to stick by him later on but can he even deny how weak he is for her at this point? Of course not.

"Since Jimin and Chaeyoung's coming for dinner...if you need to...if you need some space, I mean...please go with them, okay? I need to know where to find you,"

"You're scaring me a little here...what's it about?"

I'm scaring her? I'm the one who's scared here! Come on, Kook...it needs to be done, whether you like it or not -

"I've been delaying this cus I was scared...but I need to be honest,"

She pursed her lips before sighing, "If it's not about any other girl, there's nothing for you to worry about -"

"Just promise me...that you'll go with your friend,"

She nods. Jungkook takes a deep breath and held it in for a few seconds. When he exhaled, he decided to resign his fate solely onto her. 

"My eomma..." Her eyes widened slightly and she starts fidgeting...probably because it's the first time they're actually talking about the topic after that one hurtful evening. "As I mentioned before, my eomma has alzheimer," He looks down to his own fingers, picking one after the other.

"It's alright if you're not ready to talk about it with me," Her voice is soft and he knew it's her way of apologizing again. But it's not about that...does she think I'm still holding onto it? "I was out of line...I'm really sorry. I trust you...I know that now. What you do or don't, I know you have it figured out for yourself and I trust you,"