josh's point of view
hayley walks in without knocking, as she usually does, with a couple to-go boxes in hand.
"i've arrived and i've brought food," she announces, setting the boxes on the coffee table. she sits next to me on the couch and then scoffs. "la la land? really, joshua? turn this shit off."
"it was her favorite," i mumble.
"i know. that's exactly why you shouldn't be watching it."
"i wonder if she's watched it with him."
"please, shut up." she leans forward and takes the remote, changing it to some sitcom rerun. she hands me my box of food. "i'll go get forks. you want a drink?"
"i've got some water over here."
"your tears?" she jokes, heading to the kitchen. i hear her open the drawer to grab forks and then open the fridge to get herself a drink. she also grabs a few paper towels to bring with her.
she returns to the living room and hands me my silverware. "here. now, let's eat and talk this out."
"i didn't think it would affect me this much. i mean, i don't want her back," i admit, taking a bite of my food.
i try not to think about the fact that tyler probably gave it to her.
"do you think maybe it's just the idea that she has someone and you don't?" she suggests, calling me out (like she always does).
"probably." i lean my head back against the couch and stare at the ceiling. "am i unlovable and pathetic and undeserving of happiness?"
"oh, jesus fucking christ. shut up. you may be pathetic, but not the other things." she pats my shoulder and sighs. "i love you, j. you'll find someone. but you can't let yourself wallow in this," she speaks more gently this time, more genuine.
she knows me best and she knows that calling me out like only she can does help, as much as i'd hate to admit it.
"i love you, h. thank you for the food."
"anytime, bud."
we eat the rest of our dinner, making commentary on the show playing instead of my situation. i guess i didn't realize how hungry i was, because after we finish, i feel a lot better.
"hey, what's in the third box?" i set my box on the coffee table and notice there's an unopened one left in the middle that i didn't see before.
"oh! it's dessert. tyler gave it to us for free. i told him you were upset about debby posting some stupid shit. he said he prefers sweets when eating his feelings so he just gave it to me."
"hayley."
"what?"
"why would you tell him that?" i run my hand down my face in exasperation.
"we're friends now! mutuals on ig and everything." she smiles.
"you're what?"
she is not making my problems any easier.
"yeah! he's a cool guy. he's got a good taste in music. we should all hang out some time!"
"i cant just 'hang out' with my student."
...again.
the fact that he came over for dinner and again in the middle of the night for homework already doesn't look good.
"why not?"
"i don't know... isn't that like... against the rules? and weird?"
"only if you make it weird." she shrugs. "he's eighteen."
YOU ARE READING
clementine // joshler
Fanfiction"i don't need anyone. i just need everyone and then some." - in which tyler is a senior in high-school who's been living on his own for two years and josh is a teacher fresh out of college who's just gotten out of a four-year relationship. - #1 in t...
