Behind The Alpha Book 5 Deacon

Chapter 18

(Chapter song ‘That's My Girl’ by Fifth Harmony, ‘Mercy’ by Shawn Mendes)
DEACON

I’m just gonna say it.  I’m the luckiest damn bastard on the planet.  This girl…I fucking hope they broke the mold because I don’t want to share any piece of her with anyone. 
The last three days have been so amazing.  I’ve never been filled with so much pride in my life. 
After figuring out what she’s comfortable with doing on the field, she opened up big time.  She told me quick that she doesn’t do public displays of nudity. My solution?  Escort my lady to the locker room. 
I walk her in, let her undress and she shifts into her wolf.  Her wolf is just as shy as she is so she glues herself to my leg as I walk her out.  I don’t care.  My baby needs to feel safe and I’m providing that for her.
You better believe I strut out of that building with my chest out.  She’s the prettiest damn wolf in this unit as far as I’m concerned.  As soon as I’m outside, I shift at her side and escort her to the tracking field. 
Riley delivers instructions and she does something that makes my fucking jaw drop. 
She was on the rocks, using her nose like I’ve been teaching her over the last few days.  She’s a cute little tracker and worked the boxes fabulously so, I decided to include her in the days Hide ‘n Seek game.  We chose our ‘victim' and let the wolves go. 
I watched her sniff around and then she looked up the mountain wall.  She sniffed the air and started climbing.  I freaked out.  I ran to the wall.  “Riley!”  I point up to Jenny. 
Riley wolf barks and she barks back from a boulder halfway up the wall.  She continues on her trek.  Completely disobeying a direct order.
“JENNIFER!  GET DOWN!!”  I yell at her.
She just looks at me and turns to climb higher. 
“Damn it!”  I growl.  I shift and jump up the wall.  The damn woman’s going to get herself killed. 
Someone howls and I leap, almost losing my grip.  Jenny balances on a skinny ledge and my gut feels sick.  He barks and whines.  She doesn’t even look back. 
She jumps and lands on a rock.  Her back paws slip and she grabs a small tree in her teeth.
Terror rips through me seeing her dangling as her claws try to find a hold.  ‘Fuck!  Jennifer!  Stay right there!’  I yell through the link.  From this height she could lose her life.
‘I got this!’  She responds.
‘NO!  STAY!’  I bark.
I watch her back paws find grip and she pulls herself back up the rock.  I release a breath of relief. 
She sniffs and zig zags her jumps.  My wolf is completely pissed because one, he’s scared and he hates fear, and two she’s not listening.
She makes a huge jump across a gap and I fucking lose my shit.  ‘ARE YOU INSANE?!’
‘I thought you were the fun one?’  She snips.
‘Safe fun!  This is not safe!’  I argue as my wolf tries to crosses the thin ledge with his large ass paws.  I watch as small rocks and dirt fall down the wall.  My unit watches from the ground.  They look small from this height.  My heart skips beats.  Fuck.  OK.  I may have a small problem with large heights.
‘I know what I’m doing!’  She barks as her wolfs eyes narrow.
‘Three days ago, you didn’t even want to leave the apartment!  What are you doing?!’
‘Tracking!’  She shakes her head and jumps the last rock ledge to the top.  She sniffs and runs across the top of the bowl.  We stopped having the top included in our training because we’ve had recruits fall.  This is flyer domain now.  Jenny’s no flyer. 
‘Goddamn it!!’  My wolf gets to the top of the mountain and follows. 
Please don’t fall.  Please don’t fall.  I pray in my head as I try to catch up.  I see her turn to an outcrop that stretched to over the outside of the wall. She looks at me and I swear, if a wolf could smirk, she be sporting a giant, smart-ass one. 
I skid to a stop and watch in horror as she jumps off the ledge.
‘JENNIFER!’  My wolf takes off to the ledge and looks over the edge in full panic. 
I see her little blonde ass shaking her fluffy tail as she navigates the rocks down the other side then she disappears. 
‘JENN!!’  I’m really getting tired of talking to myself here. 
I find a way down and as I make a few jumps down, she pops out, her wolf barking like a crazy dog.  Her tail is wagging a mile a minute.  I stop and tilt my head.  From the rocks comes a little black wolf. 
‘No fucking way.’ 
The two she wolves bounce around the rocks in a celebration.
‘Deacon!’  I look at Riley and my wolf shakes his head.
‘Lana!  Jenny!’  They stop and look up at me.  ‘Go to the ground and stand down.  I’ll escort you back.’
‘Hey, wanna race?!’  Lana says.
‘No!’
‘Go!’  Jenny yells.  The two she wolves race down the rest of the wall.
My wolf growls loud and turns back.  ‘I’m gonna kill her!’ 
I hit the ground and take off across the field to the lot.  Just as I get to the mountain road, I see them coming up.  My wolf goes insane.  He jumps on Jenny’s wolf, licking and sniffing her all over making sure she’s OK.
‘DEACON!’  She yells.
‘You scared the shit out of me!  I hate that!’  I growl through the link.
‘Now you know how I feel.’  Her wolf side eyes me.
‘This isn’t the same thing, Jenny.’  I say.
Her wolf steps up to me.  ‘I told you I could do it.’  She pushes back my challenge.  All of a sudden she has a pair.  What the hell is going on?
My wolf stands tall in front her and eyes her.  ‘Don’t do it again.’  I say sternly. 
‘Y-You don’t control me.’  Her wolf let’s out a growly yip in response.
I look her dead in the eyes and tilt my head.  ‘Alpha or has that lost all meaning.’ 
I see her immediately become small and her wolfs eyes try to avoid mine.  ‘Sorry.’  She mumbles.  She felt that. 
‘It’s OK.  I told you.  I’m only protecting you.  You need to listen to me.  You need to trust that I know what I’m talking about.’ 
‘OK.’ 
My wolf rubs his head on hers.  ‘I’m sorry I yelled and pulled rank.  I just don’t like being scared.’ 
She pulls away.  ‘Can we go back now?’
My wolf nods.  ‘Yeah.  Go on.’ 
She trots away and joins Lana’s wolf.
As I watch the women walk back to the unit, I feel like a dick.  I didn’t mean to shrink her.  A part of me loved seeing her excited and open, but my damn protective side took over.  She’s too gentle to be taking risks like that.  I don’t know.  Maybe I like that she leans on me for safety.  The last thing I want is her scared of me, though.  I hope I didn’t do that pulling my Alpha out.
I get to the field and the girls break into a run as they join the other recruits.  I shift and stand with my arms crossed as I see her bounce around and play with Lana’s wolf. 
“That was pretty good.”  I glance at Peter who slid up beside me.  “She’s a good tracker if she can find my Luna.”
I rub my neck and blow out a breath.  “That’s my girl.”  I smile.  She stops and looks my way.  Her tail gives a little wag and I wave at her. 
I can’t do that again.  I mean, I won’t let her kill herself, but if she’s to trust me, I have to trust her.  I should support her if she wants to be involved.  Getting angry at her for my issues will only hurt her.  God, I really am a dick. 
“You should put her through formal training though.  She needs to work on that discipline.”  Peter claps my back and walks away. 
“Yeah.”  I grumble. 
I doubt she would, but Pete’s right.  I can’t have her not listening when I call her.  I wasn’t expecting her to be so stubborn.  It…didn’t seem like her.  I think I need to find out more. 

**** 

I walk out of the bedroom wearing sleep pants and rubbing my wet head with a towel. 
When I get down the stairs, I don’t see her.  The room is dimly lit with our electric fireplace on.  I walk around my couch and my face softens. 
My baby is in tiny shorts and tank, on her belly with a big pillow underneath her, in front of the fireplace.  Her wet hair is pulled into a messy bun and her head is leaning on her hand.  She’s reading and the glow from the fire is reflecting off her glasses.  Her feet are in the air and my wolf can’t help but purr at the sight.  She’s looked cute before, but damn.  How much more adorable can she get?
I walk to the kitchen and pour two glasses of wine.  I walk them over to her and drop to my but.  I hand her one and her soft, pink lips turn to smile.
“Thank you.”  She says.
“You’re welcome.”  I lean down and kiss her. 
I mirror her position beside her.  “What are you reading?” 
She glances at me.  “The Beast King.” 
I smile.  “Is it naughty?” 
She shoves me a bit.  “Maybe a little.”
I jut my chin out.  “Show me.”
She sighs.  I can feel her body heat.  She’s positions her glasses.  “I walk the halls of the dark castle.  As free as I am, I’m not free.  I never will be.  This is my prison and my warden is the beast that lives here.  My only solace is my dreams of the outside world.”
She clears her throat.  “As the days turned to weeks though, I’ve been noticing the King is not as beastly as he acts.  He has a heart under those robes.  I saw it the other night as he tried to control me.  His hands may be strong, but when they touched my skin, I felt his gentle side.  His angry eyes softened as he felt my fear.  I could see he didn’t want me to fear him like his kingdom does.  Do I want to fear him?  No.  I don’t want to fear him, but he took my life and I don’t think I can forgive that.”
I roll onto my back.  “When do we get to the spicy part?”
She side eyes me.  “It’s coming.  Shush.” 
I chuckle.  “Yes, ma'am.” 
She continues.  “My thoughts were interrupted by heavy footfalls on the castles stone floors.  My heart skips and I hold my breath as I become frozen in my spot.  I stand still as a statue as his large, black shadow plays on the wall in front of me. 
His giant frame fills the hallway and I immediately find his eyes.  ‘There you are.’  He growls so deep, I feel it in my bones.
‘You were looking for me?’  My voice shakes in the light of the torches.”
I roll back over and take the book from her.  I call up my inner actor.  “He steps closer.  ‘Yes.  I didn’t like how you left last night.’  He says gruffly.”
Jenny giggles and finds the next lines.  “I take a step back.  ‘I’m sorry if I offended…’” 
I take over.  “You didn’t offend.  It was I who offended you.  For that, I apologize.  You’re right.  I spent much of my life demanding, I’ve forgotten what it’s like to listen.”  I take the book fully from her.  “The mighty king steps up to me.  I should be scared, but what I feel is more like pity.  The man that has everything is showing me he truly has…nothing.  Our fight last night proved that.  He’s spent forever taking what he wanted with little care for anyone else.  Now, it seems, he realizes he just can’t take me.  He can’t control me like his subjects.”   I drop the book.
“Dea?”  She tries to find my face as I lower my head. 
“I’m sorry.”  I say.
“For what?” 
I roll my head to hers.  “For this morning.  It was stupid Alpha crap and I didn’t mean it.  Really.  My emotions got out of control and I overreacted.” 
I close the book and set it down.  I roll to my side and cuddle her.  “I never want to make you feel small or unimportant.  I always want you to feel like you’re up here, above me.  You will always be important to me, Jenn.  If I ever pull rank like that again, you have my permission to call me out.  Don’t ever fear me, OK.  Don’t ever feel weak around me.  If you want to be strong and fierce, you be damn fierce.  I’ll be right behind you backing your pretty ass up.” 
I lean my head on hers.  “You are strong and wonderful.  So fucking beautiful, I can’t stand it.  No matter what happens, don’t let my dumb Alpha get in the way of you being your best.  OK?”
“So, I can tell you you’re being a big dumb Alpha king?”  She grins.
“Maybe leave out the dumb part.”  I smirk. As I lean to her. 
She laughs before I bruise her lips. 
My girl.  My Jenny.  She may act small, but inside there’s an independent, strong she wolf.  In fact, she’d make an awesome Luna.  The thought had crossed my mind more than a few times.  Is it possible that a quiet, sweet librarian from the east coast is my Fated?  There’s really only one way to find out.   I won’t bring it up to her tonight, I want to pop this question the right way.  I’ll wait until we get back home.