Myct oneshots (ON HIATUS FOR NOW)

Stupid [kwt]

"Karl, if me and you weren't together, I'd definitely date Sapnap." That sentence flooded Karl's mind like a deranged river. He was only joking with Karl..wasn't he? He hoped it was a joke. He didn't want Dream to leave him. He wasn't good a keeping relationships but he wanted this one to last. He was already so attached. After all it had already been a year sense they got together, he'd already planned his whole future with him. He wasn't ready for him to leave, he never would.

The more he thought about it, the more wanted to cry, but he was pulled out of his thoughts by a loud yell,

"KARL!"

Karl shook his head, trying to shake the thoughts away from him.

"Hm? What's going on?"

"Pft- Are you okay? You've been daydreaming or something for the past 10 minutes." His boyfriend, Dream, said with a hint of real concern in his voice. "Oh no yeah, I'm..fine. Just starting thinking for some reason lol!" Karl smiled and looked at his hands, his over thinking thoughts couldn't seem to go away. He hated his mind and the people that made his mind like this.

"Well me and Sapnap were talking about moving in together, do you wanna move in with us?"

"Yeah it'd be fun to do that!" Karl giggled

"Great! Do you think we could also meet up soon?" Dream asked.

"Uhh.. I think yeah. I don't have a lot going on over here in North Cali."

"Oh awesome so we could definitely meet up soon then!"

"Yeah..we uh, I gotta go. It's getting late. Uhm cya boys!" Karl quickly left the call with Dream and Sapnap then shut off his computer. He walked over and plopped onto his bed while his head ran crazy with thoughts. Sad thoughts. Thoughts that said;

"You're not good enough for him"

"He'll leave you and go off with Sapnap or someone way better than you'll ever be."

"It's you're fault. You ruined his life."

"You. are. a. terrible. boyfriend.

He couldn't help but cry. It was probably true anyway. He probably was all of those things he told himself he was.

"Why does it have to be me.." He sobbed, "why does my heart always g-get broken? Why can't I-I ever be happy?!"

Karl wanted to scream.

He wanted to scream. He wanted to scream at him parents for ruining his childhood, He wanted to scream at Sapnap for being better than him, He wanted to scream at himself for being the worst person ever.

But it wasn't fair to him. Why was everything his fault? Why was he so unloveable? Why was he so replaceable? Why was he so stupid.

Dream probably never loved him anyway, he probably wanted Sapnap more than him. I mean it was probably very true, he'd told Karl that if they weren't together he'd go run off with Sapnap. Sapnap was probably a better partner for Dream anyway. Sapnap was funny, cool, never that upset at anything. Karl wished he could be like that. But he wasn't. He was never going to be like that. He was always going to be the same sad, dissociated, piece of shit he'd always been.

He sat there and cried his heart out until he eveantaly passes out due to exhaustion.

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530 Words