Lilith (old version)

Chapter 18

Lilith

God couldn't forgive like this.

I turn away from Lorenzo sharply, I know it's inevitable that he's going to talk to me but that doesn't mean I have to acknowledge him. I busy myself by wiping the back counter down as slowly as possible to buy myself time. I'm not ready to talk to him, or anyone for that matter. The thing is what he said was bad, but it wasn't anything I'm not used to, it's the fact that he fooled me into thinking he was different.

He's made me into a complete idiot. I didn't trust him, but I didn't not trust him either. I told him things about me which I haven't told anyone before, and sure it was almost always only due to circumstance that he was there to witness me at my weakest, but I still made a conscious decision to tell him those things. Then he went and threw them straight back into my face.

"Can I get a beer, whatever's on tap." I hear his voice ask. It's smart that he's ordering something, I can't ignore him if he's a customer. But I know he isn't 18 so it won't last for long.

"Can I see some ID?" I ask in a fake sweet voice.

He silently pulls it out of his wallet and hands it to me. I'm ready to laugh in his face and hand it back to him but it says he is 18. It's got to be a fake then. 

"Just checking this is real." I say, forcing the snap out of my voice.

I run it under the scanner on the register, and it beeps which shows it truly is a real ID. I badly want to question how he's 18 but in the same year as me, but I also want him to leave as soon as possible so I hold my tongue. I guess he retook a year, but why I have no clue. He's smart, and never gets a bad test score so I don't see why he would need to retake a year. 

I hand it back to him, albeit reluctantly, and start pouring his beer. As soon as I hand it to him he takes a long drink, and half of it is gone before he sets it down on the bar. 

"Lilith, you have no idea how sorry I am. I had absolutely no right to say that to you, and I didn't mean it in the way it came out at all. I understand that I don't know you that well, but I really want to get to know you." He takes a deep breath in and looks me straight in my eyes. All I see is the sincerity reflecting from his words.

"Enzo, it's not what you said. It's what it meant to me. I haven't told anyone or shown anyone those things before, and you went and threw them back in my face. I don't feel comfortable around you anymore, so please, just leave me alone." My words fade out into a near whisper by the end. I don't want him to leave me alone, but I was being honest when I said I didn't feel comfortable around him. 

"I'm so sorry, if you truly want me to leave you alone then I will. But can you give me one last shot, just for tonight. I want to prove to you that you can trust me." He says. 

"What do you have in mind?" I ask, slightly curious now. 

"It's a lot to ask, I know, but can you come to my house tonight? I'll drive you of course, if you're okay with that. You opened up to me about what you've been through, so I just thought if I opened up to you it would prove that you can trust me." He explains. I won't lie, I'm definitely curious now. But curiosity killed the cat. Good think I don't want to live though I guess.