After All This Time// Sebastian Sallow x Reader Hogwarts Legacy Fanfiction

Chapter 71

"I- I'm going to need time to process all of this," he said, backing away from me. 

"I assumed you would," I replied, my voice unsteady. "Please don't hate me," I whispered. 

"I'm not sure what to think right now," he replied, looking to the ground. "So it was you? You did this? But why? You could have gotten me out of that in some other way."

"It was the safest way," I pleaded. I didn't want to lose him. I didn't want this to burn the bridge that could get me close to him again. "I couldn't let him hurt you again." With those words, the tears that had been threatening to fall, began to spill down my cheeks. I couldn't help it. 

"I want you to know that I love you, Sebastian, and I always will, regardless of how you will feel about me now," I told him, trying to keep my voice as steady as I could. "Even if you don't understand why I did it, I need you to know that it was in your best interest at the time." 

"How did I feel about it then?" he asked me.

"You didn't like it then either." 

"Of course I didn't," he scoffed. "It was selfish of you to do that. To take away my memories."

"I don't see it like that," I stated. "You think I would do that if there was any other option?"

"I don't know," he said sarcastically. "I wouldn't know. You took away my choices regarding this matter the moment you decided to use that spell on me."

He turned away from me and swiftly made his way towards the exit of the commons. 

"Sebastian, wait!" I called after him. He turned around for a moment, but I couldn't get anything out. A lump was forming in my throat as he looked at me, all of the pain and confusion he was feeling was on his face and right on the surface in his eyes. He pivoted back around and left. 

I love you. 

That's what I wanted to say. But I couldn't. 

All I wanted to know is what he was thinking. I knew he was upset that night before I used the spell, but to me, it was the only way to get him out of there unharmed. But looking at it now, even though he was physically fine, I could see that he was suffering in other ways. 

I don't know if telling him was the right thing. 

Sebastian's POV//

Knowing what happened to me puts me at some ease- but I still can't believe she would do that to me. 

She claims that she loves me. 

So what were we?

I know there are memories that I'm missing now- all memories pertaining to that girl. But I don't know what these memories are. The only thing running through my mind is how unfair all of this is. She told me that I didn't want her to go through with this in the first place. 

Would someone who loves me really do this? I needed to know more about this girl. I want to know what she knows about me. I want to know what she meant to me, to see if it's even worth getting to know her again. 

But she said that she loves me.

I've never found it to be a particularly easy task, getting people to know and understand me. Of course there's Anne and Ominis- but I was even able to drive Anne away. 

And now that I think about it, there are memories missing from my fifth year; I know what happened to a basic degree, but there are gaps. Ominis did say that she was a new student out fifth year, perhaps we were close, even back then?