Let It Be

Mind Games

AN: x's to separate raunchiness.

July 2000

Liam had been right. This tour had been a lot more sensible. Fatherhood appeared to have settled them both down. But there had been new challenges. Liam was still grappling with his divorce and that had knocked his confidence a lot. Alison thought he was quite down most days. He wasn't himself. Not the confident, funny Liam she had once known. He was self deprecating and the barbed words that Noel directed to him when he got annoyed that he used to bat right back he just took now. Accepted as his.

Alison and Liam had become close again. They would often stay up late simply talking about anything and everything that came to mind. Liam wasn't afraid to tell her everything on his mind because he knew he wouldn't be judged by her. He didn't need to be perfect with her. He'd already fucked up. She'd seen him at his most fucked up he needn't spare her. And similarly Alison wasn't afraid to get personal with him. But what was new was the lack of touching. They would sit side by side in dressing rooms or outside venues looking at the light polluted skies. Sometimes the urge to comfort Liam and touch him would strike and they would hold hands or embrace but nothing more. Liam had kept his word. And she was glad. They were getting along so well. Why ruin it?

The Wembley gig was approaching and tensions were high. Noel was missing home. He'd found this tour hard. Trix couldn't join him with Kerr being so small.

Alison winced as Liam slammed the door closed violently.

"You could try being a little kinder to him." She said gently.

Noel snorted and looked at her his eyes hard with anger.

"Kinder? It's him that's out of order!"

Alison stood up and glared back at him.

"You're both out of order for fuck's sake! I know you're missing your family. But that's not his fault. He's got a baby too you know. And he's...he's struggling. I'm worried about him." She said as she nervously paced to the other side of the room.

Noel snorted.

"Worried? Wouldn't bother. Fucker's got too big an ego to top himself."

Alison froze and tensed her fingers into fists as she felt rage roll through her body.

"Noel...I can't even look at you right now or I'll punch you. How dare you say that?!"

Alison could feel Noel's eyes on her and she felt her rage intensify as she saw he was smiling.

"You care about him don't you." He said gently.

Alison exhaled shakily letting her rage calm slightly.

"Course I do. Always have. Same as you even if you don't show it."

Noel nodded.

"But I mean...I see how you two are again. You're close. It's nice. It's good for him."

Alison blushed.

"Just friends. We made a deal. No sex."

Noel's eyes widened in surprise.

"Right. How's that going then?"

Alison nodded.

"Well, thank you."

Alison wondered if he'd been seeing anyone since his divorce. It would probably help him move on. Physical intimacy could help in that respect too. Her stomach churned as she thought of him with other women in bed making them feel the way he used to make her feel.

"Do you think he has someone? It'd probably help."

Noel shrugged.

"You know more than me. If he hasn't told you then I'd say no. He's not been with girls like normal...maybe he isn't...right. like you said." Said Noel worrying his lip momentarily.