Fading to Black // Kirk Hammett

28. Take It Easy

September 15th, 1984

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It was around 4 a.m. and I had finally made it back to Cliff and I'd apartment. It was around a 5 hour flight, and the airport was 20 minutes from our place.

I sleepily smiled at my car, which was sitting exactly where I'd left it in the parking lot. I walked up to the door, shuffling for my keys before I unlocked it.

When I opened the door, Cliff was surprisingly still awake, sitting on the couch and watching a movie.

He head snapped in my direction. However once he saw me, his expression changed from panicked to relief.

"Holy shit." He mumbled, lifting himself off the couch and walking towards me.

"Hey cliff." I smiled at him exhaustedly.

"Where the fuck have you been, kid?" He questioned with a concerned tone.

He engulfed me in a firm hug, and I couldn't help but cry. I had missed Cliff so much while I was gone, and I never got the chance to tell him I left with Dave. So I can't imagine how worried he was, when he got home from tour, with no sign of me or Dave to be found.

"Well I was with Dave, but that didn't work out." I sighed, slightly laughing.

"What happened? I was worried about you, I haven't heard from you." He frowned slightly.

"I'm so sorry Cliff. It's a really long story." I said setting down my suitcase.

"We got all night kid." He laughed slightly, and motioned his head for me to sit down on the couch with him.

I sat down with him, and took a deep breath before I spoke.

"I went on tour with Dave," I paused, momentarily.

"He ended up falling back into his addiction, and it was way worse this time. He was pushing me a little, which isn't terrible but y'know. I didn't wanna walk away because I felt like I'd be letting him and Junior down, but he cheated on me so I just couldn't take it anymore." I explained, choking up as I did so.

Cliff just frowned at me, pulling me into a hug.

"He was pushing you?" He questioned.

"I mean yea, but it was only a little. I never got seriously hurt or anything." I shrugged.

"I'm so sorry, kid. I didn't even know you two got back together." He mumbled sadly.

"That was his excuse for cheating on me. He never 'officially' said we were together. Yet he told me he loved me for a while before things got messy again." I shrugged.

He frowned at me. "Are you doing okay?"

"I'm fine now, I mean better than when it first happened. It's stings, but it's not the end of the world." I said quietly, giving him a soft smile.

He looked at me with a puzzled look on his face, before heavily sighing, and taking a swig of his beer.

"Just take it easy okay? I don't want you getting back in the drug shit again." He said sincerely.

"Y'know, I only started it to get rid of this agonizing feeling of numbness that just kinda took over me after Kirk left." I sighed.

"Do you still feel that way?" Cliff questioned, furrowing his brows in concern.

"Yeah, but I'm just learning to deal with it." I shrugged.

He frowned at me yet again.

"I miss him Cliff. So much." I sighed, tears filling my eyes.

"Dave?" He raised an eyebrow at me.

I shook my head slowly, biting my bottom lip to stop myself from crying.

He paused momentarily, then it looked like a light lit up inside his head.

"Ah, Kirk." He said smirking to himself.

"How is he?" I asked quietly, looking at Cliff with teary eyes.

"He's not doin' too hot." He took a sip of his beer.

"What do you mean?" I furrowed my brows.

"He's miserable without you, kid." Cliff sighed.

"What?" My heart dropped to my ass.

"I've noticed it, I don't know about the rest of 'em, but you can kinda just tell. He doesn't have that same stupid cheesy grin all the time, he just kinda doesn't seem there anymore y'know? tHe just zoned out most' the time." Cliff shrugged, chugging down what was left of his beer.

I just frowned, my stomach churning.

"He was devastated when we got back and you weren't here. He's been talking about you non-stop." He sighed, looking at me sympathetically.

"Does he know where I was?" I asked quietly.

"Nah." Cliff shook his head.

I just nodded silently in response.

"Look, I think you should come with me to practice tomorrow. You two have some stuff you need to talk out, I can't stand seeing either of you like this." He sighed.

"Okay." Is all I managed to mutter out.

"Now go to bed and get some sleep." He chuckled, as he leaned over and hugged me.

I lifted myself off the couch and walked upstairs.

"Night Cliff." I smiled at him.

A/N - this chapter sucked ass i'm so sorry help.