Chapter 36

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Jasper P.O.V

***2 months later***

It's been hard coping without Danny or Jamie. I dropped out of the dance academy....and joined a different school. They started letting Danny call me twice a day....he threatened to kill himself if they didn't(he wasn't actually going to do it, he was just pushing there buttons). This whole mess was my fault. Everything. I fucked over Jamie....and Danny. I told myself that I wouldn't ever be that person anymore. I won't hurt anyone again. I got my own apartment....and a job. I couldn't live with a family that looked at me as if I was a monster....an outcast. My dad agreed(he basically put me out) and bought a apartment for me and paid 3 months rent to give me time to save up from my job. I clocked out at 10:30 from my new job at Crazy Carrie's Diner.

"See you later Carrie!!!" I called grabbing my keys to my BMW. On my way home I decided to stop at a corner store to get some milk and bread. I was coming out of the store when I see these gang of dudes surrounding someone.

"Look at him he's totally wasted." one guy said.

"Nice body he has huh?"

"Leave me alone!!!"

"Kind of hard to tell with all those clothes on"

"He's a little faggot!!!"

"Stop...dont don't touch me asshole!!"

I put my milk and bread in my car. I heard something rip followed by laughter.

"Take his pants off !!!"

I walked over to them and pushed one of them aside. I was shocked. Jamie was on the ground his shirt was ripped and one of the dudes grabbed him. I punched him in the face.

"Leave him alone" I warned the rest of them. I hit on the face and that when I lost it. Forgot my karate lessons? I kicked one of the guys in the nuts and picked up Jamie and made a run for it.

"Come on Jamie I got you."

He was wasted....

"Jasperrrr?!!!"

I drove him back to my place and sat him on the couch.

"What are you doing out so late?" I asked giving him some water.

"I walked to the store....I was getting a test, and a new lighter."

"Test?"

"I miss you Jaspy"

He climbed in my lap and buried his head in the crook of my neck. I wrapped my arms around him. He smelt of liquor. I rubbed his bare arm.

"Did you burn your self again?"

"Jasper....shut up. Just let me forget what you did...that you broke my heart"

He kissed me. I knew it wasn't right...but I couldn't help but kiss him back.

"I miss you.....I miss you so much. I'm sorry Jamie" I hugged him. This is what I wanted, who I wanted.

"I-I never meant to hurt you, it's just that I didn't want to hurt Danny either. I tried to make him understand, but he just wouldn't budge. I love him, I have to but not the way I love you. I never intended for any of this to happen.....but you let Alex get between us....then he threatened me to break up with you, and posted that stuff about me and Danny." I explained. He shook his head.

"It's okay....I forgive you...just hold me"

We fell asleep just like this on my couch.

******

When I woke up this morning Jamie was gone. I felt a bit sad....I bet he didn't remember anything. That means he doesn't remember forgiving me. There was a note on the fridge:

Be back soon....borrowed your car. Thanks. There's breakfast in the mirowave.

~Xoxoxo Jamie

I smiled to myself getting the plate out the microwave. Blue berry pancakes....my favroite. I drenched the hot cakes with syrup. yummy!!! I felt like a little kid. After I finished I washed the dishes.

"Jasper," I heard his soft voice behind me. I turned around he looked like he was going to puke and that's exactly what it he did. I helped him to the bathroom, cleaned up the mess and seen him sitting on the edge of the tub.

"Are you okay?" I sat next to him and rubbed his back.

"Please...please don't be angry with me"

"I won't"

"I-umm I'm pregnant?" It sounded more like a question. I didn't know what to say. Was he forreal ?

"I went to the doctor....last week. I'm 4 months to be exact" he rubbed his belly.

"James...."

"I'm sorry....I'll raise him by myself. I understand" he got up and I followed him.

"Him? We're having a boy,"

"We? You mean..."

"I wouldn't desert you. yes we're in this together. We're gonna be a family" I smiled putting my arms around his waist.

"I never stopped loving you.....even though you cheated. Alex tried to get me to get back with him, or sleep with him and even though we broke up I just couldn't do it."

"Please stay with me"

I whispered rubbing his stomach. He did have a little baby bump. This explains why he was so emotional lately.

I brought him to my room and took off his pants. I started to take the jacket off but he grabbed my arm.

"Don't-"

I took the jacket off anyway it was mine. He turned away in shame.

"You need to start taking better care of yourself...You can't burn yourself to death." I got him one of my big shirts.....and he put it on and laid down. I got in the bed and he snuggled in my arms.

"Why do you do it?"

He was silent for so long , I thought he had fallen asleep.

"I rather hurt myself before I let anyone eles hurt me....."

I kissed his forehead.

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