𝙰𝙱𝙲'𝚂 𝚂𝚝𝚎𝚕𝚕𝚊𝚛𝚒𝚍𝚎 𝚂𝚝𝚢𝚕𝚎

𝙿𝚎𝚛𝚏𝚎𝚌𝚝

Stella returning from her GOF trip had been tense, even awkward. Kelly was still angry and hurt by Stella ghosting him before she returned home. They had talked about everything. Stella assuring him she in fact still wanted to marry him. Shutting down a worry of Kelly's that she had been with someone else. Stella explained why she had ghosted him. Experiencing a moment of panic about becoming lieutenant at 51. Stella explaining she thought Kelly would have been disappointed in her. Kelly shocked. How could he ever be disappointed in her? Still, even with her explanations and he accepted her reasoning. He couldn't help but still feel angry. Feeling that Stella had abandoned him. As much as he wanted to just move on. He couldn't. So, he put up a wall. Sure, they had sex, he kissed her when she initiated intimacy but Stella could sense he was just appeasing her. He really wasn't engaged with her like he always has been. Stella knew she had royally screwed thinks up. Now, she was terrified she had screwed things up so badly that there would be no coming back from it. Her dream of building a life with the only man she would love was in serious jeopardy. She didn't know how to fix this. Kelly was getting more angry and annoyed the more she apologized.

"No one is perfect, not even Stella Kidd"
"Yeah. I just want to be the perfect one for you"
"You are the perfect one for me"

In that moment. As he wrapped his arms tightly around her, she had felt for the first time in days they were slowly getting back to where they were.

Later as they settled into bed for the night. Stella was still restless. After a passionate session of love making. Stella, still feeling anxious. Kelly had fallen asleep. Stella kept tossing and turning. Finally settling on her back. Eyes wide open. She was thinking maybe she should just go to the couch so she didn't disrupt her fiancée. Kelly waking up and seeing the anguish on Stella's face. Knowing her mind was circling. Kelly felt he had a valid reason to be angry with her these past days but now he felt broken seeing how she was struggling with guilt and regret. Noticing she had been quietly crying. That broke his heart. No matter what. He never wanted to be the reason she ever cried. As angry as he was with her. She was punishing herself for days now. So vulnerable with her own regret. He had reassured her she was completely forgiven and he wanted them to move forward. He meant what he had said. She was the perfect one for him. Always had been, always would be.

"Stella. Baby. Talk to me. I can see you are struggling"

"I'm sorry I woke you up"

"NO. Don't be sorry. Just talk to me"

"I'm so grateful you forgave me. I just don't feel I deserve to be forgiven. I made you doubt me. Made you doubt us. I never ever wanted to hurt you in that way"

"Stella. Sweetheart. Stop it right now. Shall we go back to all the times I made you feel this way. You put up with me, my walls, lack of communication. All of it"

"Yeah. And I broke up with you because of it"

"Stella. Listen. Things are different now. We were dating for a short time when that happened. We were just starting to build our foundation at that point. Now, we are engaged. We have gone through so much together and we are so much stronger together. And remember after our breakup, it didn't take long for us to find our way back to one another. Even through this. I never once thought about us breaking up. I was angry and frustrated. I questioned things, YES. But I never once doubted the love we have for each other. Please, baby. Stop punishing yourself. Everything is forgiven. I love you, Stella Kidd more than anything. I want us to move forward. Look ahead to becoming husband and wife."

"OK. I promise to stop looking back and just start thinking ahead. Thank you, Kelly. Please never doubt how much I love you. I can't wait to marry you"

"Me too. Stella. Me too. You're are the greatest person I have and will ever have in my life. And just so you know. You are going to be an amazing leader. I will remind you of that everyday. No matter what you do with your career. I will NEVER be disappointed in you. Just always talk to me, OK?"

"Deal. I promise. I will never let you down like that again"

"I know babe"

Stella fell into a deep sleep. All the anxiety slipping away. Curled up into her fiancées arms.