MASCARA

Chapter Fifteen

Chapter fifteen as a thank you for 15,100 reads! Thank you guys so much. I love you all tons.

----

Katana's Pov

I woke up really early and went about my morning as usual. I brushed my teeth, did my hair, and cleaned the apartment all before Jay and Maya woke up.

I took out the trash before the service came around and made the beds before housekeeping made their rounds. I even ironed our clothes but nothing felt normal, nothing felt usual everything was different.

Something about this morning was foreign but as I stand in front of this door on Hull Street everything feels right. This was home, this was normal.

"Katana? Darling, is that you?" I hear the strangled, raspy voice before I see its carrier and immediately I regret making the journey. I don't wanna face her or the millions of questions.

"K? I know you hear me chile, don't make me ask ya again. That you?"

I turn and Nana Mae stands behind me with groceries in her arms, black apron secured around her waist, and gray hair tied loosely at the crown of her head.

"Yes ma'am. It's me." I say trying to hide my defeated tone.

"Well come in, it's chilly." She says pushing past me.

I'm not sure how many but minutes have passed and it's after seven because Jay is now blowing up my phone.

"Honey, answer that phone. The sound makes me wanna kill ya."

I grin all while answering, only to hear Jay frantically screaming on the end.

"Where have you been?"
"Are you safe?"
"Why didn't you leave a note?"
"Are you stuck?"
"Why is your car here?"
"Please tell me you did not take the subway."
"I'm coming to get you. Where are you?"

The questions go on for awhile before I answer them all and promise to be home soon which he barely takes before I hang up and silence my phone.

"Your lover chile?" Nana Mae asks while placing a cup of coffee in front of me and one in front of herself.

"I see you in the papers often. You got a new family. You don't need me no more." She continues looking down in her cup and I'm certain I see a tear drop in as if it were creamer.

Nana Mae is sixty seven but doesn't look or act a day over thirty. She's my mothers mom and the only piece I ever had of her. After my daddy died she took me in and gave me love.

I moved out when I was 17. I remember saying that I wanted freedom but I just wanted to rid myself of my mother ever if that meant losing Nana and my family.

"I always need you. I just can't need you, it's hard."

"What's hard about loving people that love you? It ain't hard."

"I never got it. How could you love me? I drove her away. I took your baby and you still loved me. You still cared. I tried and I wasn't good enough -" I say choking back tears.

"No, she left. You didn't take her away, she walked away and you did the same damn thing. You left me, she left me. You didn't make anything better, you repeated history." She says pouring out her cup of joe.

"I -"

"No, you need to face it. You were so busy hating her that you became her. Katana, you're not Akisma. You're not her. You are lovely, brave, and tough. You have been for years. I tell by the way you carry yourself. But you're becoming her as you try forgetting and you forget that you deserve love and you're trying to find excuses and reasons why you don't." She says taking a seat in front of me.

"What about that man, oh that man. I've never met him but lord that man loves you. Love him. Love him like you've never loved before. Don't be her. Don't lose yourself to someone who didn't stick around to see you become you."

The tears beat me and come flooding through like the gates of heaven. I feel it coarse through my body, it's a rush, a feeling. Like everything is washed out of me and I am renewed. Like I'm alive.

"Now come give me a hug baby and go home to that man." She says smiling at me and with that smile I know she knows that I'm okay now.

After promising to return, I do as I'm told.

Jays Pov

I here the door close and I make my way into the living room to greet Katana.

"Hey baby, I was just about to go. Maya is with granny, I have to go out for bit." I say kissing her cheek and hugging her tightly.

"Everything okay?" Katana asks and I lie.

"Yeah just some things at the office to handle." I reply and grab my keys.

She nods and kisses me before wishing me well.

I leave and now here sit in a corner of a room, wishing I could leave but knowing this is something I have to do.

"I'm angry. God, I'm so angry with you." I say to the crying, shaky figure.

"I have carried this weight with me and you constantly make it crush me. Why do you hate me? Hate us?" I ask Jennifer.

"I don't. I don't. I love you Jay, so much. I do and I'm gonna -" Her figure slumps before waking again.

"I'm gonna do better. I promise." And she climbs off the bed and into my lap.

"I'm gonna be good." She says and I shush her before rocking her softly and placing her back into bed.

I watch my sister as her chest falls and rises again. Never had I felt a feeling this strong before. Here I was praying my sister didn't die after a relapse but wishing she would so that the inevitable would happen already.

"Jay?" She calls for me and I go to her like always. I've always gone to her. I shouldn't but I do.

*flashback*

"Jay?" She calls out to me in the pitch black room.

"Yeah?"

"Did mom or dad give you your allowance?"

She had asked me the question yesterday, the day before, and the day before that.

For hours she'd been scratching and shaking in the corner of our shared cabin room constantly whimpering and begging.

"Yeah mom did earlier. Why?"

"Can I borrow some? Just five, please Jay, please."

I flicked on the corner light and watched as she flinched. I knew something was wrong but I didn't know what. All I knew was that my 17 year old sister was asking me, a 12 year old, for money and that I felt obligated to give it to her because she was five years my elder.

"Yeah here." I said tossing her a five and flicking the light off.

The next time I saw her she was on a stretcher and half dead.

*end of flashback*

The beep blares behind me and suddenly I feel a pressure lift off of my chest and it feels sinister yet amazing all at once.

I turn to her and her once somber state is now peaceful, so peaceful that I wonder if I ever saw sadness at all.

//AN:

This chapter was honestly really emotional for me. I know that it was sudden but that's just life. Jennifer will be featured in a future chapter so stay tuned. Love you guys!