On The Edge Of Darkness

On the edge of darkness-1

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Phone ringing sound

"arthit?"

"Yes?"

"yes, you heard right.. I am flying tonight" It might be a hundredth proposal for arthit in his six or seven years of his university life, he had a huge fan base in college and so and so.. this turned to be a very routine for arthit, some proposals might be a serious one's, may be a committed one and he knew he might have broke their hope to which he is very familiar of the pain, but arthit cares less of the fact either they are silly or time pass or serious proposal arthit had nothing to do with them he is too neutral to love! The past makes us the future!

......... At one point in his career arthit thought to return back to Thailand now he is a complete surgeon in cardiac department, yes arthit fulfilled his dream and now as promised to his father he is returning to him, Thailand is not just a native place for arthit its been filled with all sort of memories, the memories where he is brought up his parents, his friends, and the memories that tear his heart apart yet he cannot help himself but to go back to his one and only father, enough of the longing he want to get lulled into his father arms which he missed a lot.

Arthit turns out to be a withheld person; he is determined to make his decisions happen! once he is fixated he will make it happen, anything it may be career or any personal preferences he will make sure he will achieve it, now he is a Doctor as he determined, he reach his ambition with certain goal in his mind.

The outmost concentrated mind a strong one which arthit habituated for his own benefits to keep him stay away from something which he don't wanted to look back and to keep him away from some, remembering, repeating, staying conscious of a broken pieces of memeory, he don't want to have any deviations, books is all he choose to be with and he believe in! all the insights of books are those which captivate arthit's mind keeping him busy with no sort of deviations, all this hard dedication is to keep him super busy that he just don't even want to remember himself! he just superiorly wants to involve his mind and heart on books just to let him stay away from some thoughts...clearly to put in to stop himself from remembering one particular person which would just shut down his whole world, the impact was something unexplainable the pain he don't want to remember not in this life time. Cause he knew in a unconscious state he still have those memories of his precious one which he devoted with all of his heart that one day he was very sure those memories will eat him alive and so instead he keep busying himself like a rustling big city roads always filled with loads of transportation. Just keep being busy until beyond the exhaustion, till to the last breath of life.

Taking a long look which he spend almost eight years of life he is here at the age of twenty which shook him hard with two incidents in Thailand, moving to united states he never once turned his back to look after the people he left in Thailand, now after long long years he is returning back to Thailand to serve his people with his profession. That is now costing him with memories remembering a sadness and hurt, Since there is no escape the memories are a part of him. The memories of his mother were always preserved inside him, he don't have strength to remember them again and again, but there are memories that leave him with bitter taste he wants to escape from them

Even though he is in university he meet few college mates giving them a good bye still his thoughts are driving back to when he was twenty and tears formed in his eyes, even after eight years those incidents are bringing tears to his eyes he is back to his flat he completed as his paper works and received every possible paper from university, he quickly pack his remaining bags like last time checking done and yesterday it took him half-day to clean and pack his bags, now he took a fresh shower and had his lunch he lay down on bed staring up the ceiling, trying to take fall a sleep, a short nap. but strangely today he could not sleep the thought of going back to Thailand is making him restless, it's been eight years already thinking about the years he spend without turning his back makes him gulp large lump in his throat, making curl him up hugging his knees missing something which arthit can ever get back even if he try so!