Baby Love

Chapter 22

Word Count: 1805

Averie's POV

I don't want to eat lunch. I just want to cuddle with Taylor. Daddy is being annoying as usual so I just ignore him.

I hold tight to Taylor as she eats her lunch and I try to hide away into her shirt. She smells so calming and relaxing and I just don't want to be anywhere but here now. I was really sad about them not being here. Taylor and Daddy apologized though so I guess I shouldn't be as upset but I still feel sad.

I mindlessly suck on Piglet's ear because I know Daddy doesn't like that I suck on my thumb. It mildly soothes me. I feel Taylor place kisses on my head but I don't pay much attention to it.

I don't know how long we sit there until Taylor brings me to the couch. She holds me really tight and rubs my back just like I like. I burrow myself into her even more if possible. She chuckles in response.

I can hear her and Daddy talking but I don't listen. I don't care so why does it matter? I just wanna revel in this feeling of comfort because I know now that it'll never last forever.

Taylor's POV

"She's not breaking skin or anything right?" Joe checks again because Averie has definitely tried to with how hard she's digging her nails into me.

"No, I'll survive."

"I can loosen her grip if you want," he offers.

"I'll be okay, how long does she usually disassociate like this?"

"Sometimes just a few minutes and other times it'll last all day," Joe whispers as he wraps his arm around us. I lean into it while still keeping Averie close.

"Did your mom say it was okay to snap her out of it?"

"We can try but sometimes she doesn't want to hear it so she'll block us out completely," Joe tells me, "like sometimes excess noise makes it worse. When she first got out of the hospital, she never wanted to listen to music, no yelling or screaming, and she hated the car. She's made progress since then but some days it's too much for her."

"So we triggered her to disassociate?"

"Kind of, it's more like this is how she processes things," Joe pushes Averie's messy hair out of her face. She is going to town on the poor piglet ear. That's why that ear is always so crunchy. Crunchy isn't the right word but the dried-up drool is what I'm referencing.

"Does she do this a lot too?" I ask pointing to her Piglet.

"Yep but not often. She's always been a thumb sucker but when she's really stressed it's whatever gets in her mouth first. Her therapist used to think it had to do with JJ and how much she hated Averie sucking her thumb."

"Oh, but doesn't that mess with her teeth? Isn't that what the parents always say about kids that suck their thumbs?"

"Yeah. I'll scold her about it but in the end, I know it won't matter what I say. Her comfort and safety will always triumph over my future bills medical. Besides braces can't be too expensive nowadays. The hospital even gave her a pacifier last year because she would tangle the wires. However, she didn't like it and threw it at one of the doctors later that evening," Joe gives me a forced smile. I know he has so much more to say about that incident but he keeps holding back.

I lean over and kiss his cheek. "I love you," I whisper softly. He has a lot of internal demons that he hasn't shared with me. I don't mind talking about mine, especially since my doctor told me that it would help my recovery. I tell my mom everything and him things that I deem appropriate. Like I'm not gonna gush or complain about him and Averie to him. That's what my parents and friends are for.