His Lotus

34

Thamarai

Till he unlocked the door, I had my heart thudding vigorously in worry. During the past day, I felt very disheartened and I reflected on the miserable incident that had happened between me and Deva mama. I couldn't even begin to memorize everything clearly cause all that I said to him rose from the heat of the moment when my insecurities had taken full control of me.

I thought I was worthless to be loved and that overwhelming speculation had me lashing out at Deva mama wildly! But as I reminiscenced about that kiss he plopped on my lips with utmost sincerity...I had to change my perspective.

Which was why, to meet him, I persuaded my mother with the subject of purchasing jewelries and fortunately, the women in our family agreed as they were already perturbed about mama's failure to attend the calls. I was equally frightened as them and I prayed to all gods to keep my Deva mama safe and healthy. I was also disturbed by the possibility of him being off because of me and my reckless words.

I would have been heartbroken If that was the case. However, turns out that Iniya and Harsh were the reason for his distress. And as he was presumably in love with me, I comprehended that his disappointment was mostly caused by Harsh's betrayal...

Perhaps he might have felt slightly bitter because of Iniya's action but I'm yet to confirm it with my Deva mama.

Two things hold me back from doing so...

The first is that he appeared so sick and exhausted that I wanted to take care of his health before enquiring him about any other stuff and secondly...I feel quite shy to face him after that kiss.

This is the reason why I spoke indirectly to him, asking him to get freshened up so that he wouldn't need to wait impatiently while we cook.

He doesn't react much as he makes his way to his room yet my eyes follow his desperately, pushing me to trail inside that opened door. Controlling myself, I focus on preparing the food.

We prepared poori and potato recipe as the side dish. The groceries session lacked a lot of needed supplements and we noted to purchase everything before returning to the village.

A while later, Deva mama comes out of the room, looking fresh in the black t-shirt and grey shorts. Still, his face had a dull expression to it which I'm obvious is because of his hunger.

I hastily run to the small table and place the poori and his mother arranges the potato recipe alongside. As mama nears, I disappear quickly to the kitchen again and watched him eat with a fluttering heart.

Soon, we ladies also sat on the floor in a circle and started to have our breakfast after brushing. Seeing us seated down, Deva mama also joins us. He is right opposite to me and I maintained my gaze anywhere except him.

"When are you going to shopping?" He asks, gaining everyone's attention. "Shortly after the meal. Are you tagging along mama or do you want to rest?" Gayu responds to mama, calmly. "Of course, he will be coming along with us! I ain't allowing him to stay back," her mom amuses.

Deva mama just nods, "I will," and continues to ingest food.

Afterward, when everyone began refreshing to go shopping, my stomach starts to twist and I instantly realize that my periods had hit me. It should be delayed to another five days but I understand that the stress I experienced had stimulated it's early production.

Post bathing, I wear a simple sandal churidar and tie the towel around my head, limping to my mother to inform her about my periods cause my cramps are too harsh for me to tolerate.

Mom was combing her hair when I approach her. Scratching her arm, I blurt out to her about my cramps. "Why does it come so early?" She surprisingly asks, getting concerned. The marriage date is fixed while concurrently calculating my ovulation time as well as an auspicious day...and that is how my wedding date befalls on the next month following my engagement one.