Double Black Oneshots

Pirate

With the inevitable death of the Russian Rat leader Fyodor Dostoevsky, the deadliest mafia organization, the Rats in the House of the Dead, ceased their operation in the country and no news were heard from the other remaining members ever since.

It was safely assumed that their enemy organization won't be back anytime soon, so every people who were involved with the case deserved a break once in a while, right?

The idea was opened during the recent meeting inside the office of the leader of the Port Mafia. Mori Ogai was even the one who suggested the need to celebrate their victory. Well since the boss was the one who brought out the topic, no one opposed it. Hence, letter of invitations were dispatched to their allied organizations.

The members of the Armed Detective Agency are currently discussing the matter in their meeting room. The former math teacher read the letter to his colleagues. Once finished, he glanced to none other than his good-for-nothing partner. The beanpole who was currently listening to his suicidal soundtrack halted and looked at his partner nonchalantly. He was casually seated on his couch with his one leg over the other.

"What's seem to be the matter, Kunikida-kun?~ Why are you staring at me with such intensity?~ If you're going to confess your feelings for me, then you'll have my apology. I'll have to decline. I only wish to profess my undying love on a beautiful maiden who's willing to commit a double suicide with me." His constant teasing truly deserves an award.

A death glare was immediately executed by his blond partner while others rolled their eyes hearing the ridiculous statement.

"WHY ON EARTH WOULD I DO THAT, SH*TTY DAZAI?!" The idealist screamed vehemently.

"It's because I'm a drop dead gorgeous looking human, of course~" The half-baked mummy returned with a smug. It was given that the uptight detective broke his first pen after that.

The broken pen undoubtedly became the first sacrificial lamb that prevent the workaholic blond to strangle his obnoxious partner to death.

"YOU ARE SO FULL OF YOURSELF, YOU DESPICABLE WASTE OF SPACE!!!"

"Now~now~ Don't be shy, Kunikida-kun~" The annoying mackerel pressed for more that made the blond megane popped some veins on his forehead.

"WHOEVER PERSON WHO'S WILLING TO BE WITH YOU MUST BE COMPLETELY OUT OF THEIR MINDS!!!" The fuming voice reached the other side of the room. Fukuzawa just closed his eyes and continue sipping his tea while browsing some files. The president was pretty much used to this as well as the other members of the agency. They didn't even bother to interpose between the two bickering parties.

The anxious weretiger was the only one who couldn't help but to eventually intercede. "Please, don't aggravate him anymore, Dazai-san. Kunikida-san is still recovering from all the injuries and stress we had during the recent case." Atsushi went to remind his mentor.

The bandaged mackerel just shrugged and for once in a while heed the request of his mentee. "As you wish, Atsushi-kun!~" He turned his attention to his partner. "So as you were saying about the invitation..."

Kunikida cleared his throat to speak. "I'm asking everyone's opinion, especially you."

"I don't see the reason why to dismiss the letter." The brunet stated with indifference.

"Are you saying it's okay to go?" The blond gave a perplexed looked.

"It's just a matter of celebrating a victory. You guys can go. Having fun and getting loose once in a while is not that bad as long as you act accountable for your action. Have you ever heard of the teaching of the great philosopher Plato? It's what you call the principle of moderation."