Her Mafia Brothers

Going home

The van was completely out of sight. Minutes passed. Yet still my brothers surrounded me, combined scolding me, hugging me, relieved that I was safe, and telling me what had very nearly happened to me and how I was so lucky and did I have any idea how lucky I was and what would have happened to me if they hadn't found me when they did, and if they'd been just a few seconds later it would have been too late?

Their voices still didn't sound like theirs. Gruff, hoarse, filled with emotions. Relief and also anger visible on not just their faces but written all over their entire bodies.

Rocco was still holding me. I was on my feet, and my butt still hurt from where Nick had slapped it, but Rocco still had his arm slung across my shoulders and was holding me tightly and Jack was in front of me holding my face in his good hand, just staring at me like he still couldn't quite believe I was safe. It was a bit surreal. My big, strong brothers, who all had guns stuffed into their waistbands, had been reduced to messes. Because of me. It was sweet, in a way. I felt so warm and melty inside, knowing that they care so much about me. But also, I knew that I was in more trouble than I'd ever been in, in my entire short life. Damon was going to kill me. But before he did, Jack was going to kill me. Except if Rocco and Nick got to me first. Probably the only brother who wasn't going to kill me was Logan, but when I snuck a quick glance across at him, I wasn't even sure. It was quite possible that he wanted to kill me too. Or slap me. Or something.

Great. All my brothers wanted to kill me dead, and then revive me so they could punish me. I knew, without a doubt, I was about to face the worst punishment of my life. This punishment was going to really, really hurt. I was going to be grounded forever. I would never see my friends again.

I gulped.

Behind my brothers, off to the side, talking into his lapel, stood Paul and a couple of other members of our security team that I didn't know very well. I mean I'd seen them around a bit, but I couldn't name them. I knew they had helped rescue me in some way, though, and I was grateful.

"Does Damon know?" I whispered. I didn't want him to know. Somehow, it was worse if Damon knew. It wasn't just that my punishment would be worse, it was that I didn't want to disappoint my oldest brother, and my attempt at leaving would surely disappoint him. Jack, Nick, Rocco and Logan were all partly to blame for me leaving - at least I tried to tell myself they were - Rocco especially. Him taking my door was the last straw. The very last. Nick had nothing to do with that. But Jack did, and Jack could have pulled rank and stopped him, let me keep my door, but he didn't. So really, this was Jack's fault. And Rocco's. It wasn't Damon's. And I didn't want Damon to know, because he'd feel guilty, like he'd failed me somehow, and he'd be disappointed and I didn't want that. And he'd be so, so angry. And I really didn't want that. Damon's anger scared me. I knew how dangerous and powerful of a man my brother was, and I didn't want any of that anger and power directed at me. I was afraid for my butt, but I was also afraid of being permanently afraid of my brother. Not just afraid of getting in trouble with him, but actually, genuinely frightened of him. I didn't want my hard-won trust in him to be broken. I didn't want our bond to be severed. And if Damon found out about what I'd done, that was a very real possibility.

But Paul stepped forward, dashing my hopes.

"Yes, Carrie. Of course. He's very glad you're safe. Are you okay? Are you hurt?"

I snuggled tighter against Rocco. It might have been his fault that I was in this mess, but he made me feel safe.

"I'm okay," I confirmed. "Can you please tell him I'm sorry?"

Paul nodded, then stepped back into the shadows.

I took hold of Jack's hand. His good hand, the one not in the sling. This was his fault too, but right now I needed him. I needed them all. I needed to know that they still loved me and were going to keep me safe. I needed to know that I still belonged, that I was still a part of the family. That they still wanted me.

Jack smiled at me. There was still anger in his eyes, but his smile reassured me, all the same.

Rocco squeezed my shoulder.

"Come on little sis, let's get you home."

"I'm in trouble, aren't I?" I mumbled against Rocco's chest, desperately hoping he was going to reassure me and tell me that no, they were so happy that I was back and that I was safe, that they were going to let me off, and he was going to give me back my door, to boot.

But no such luck.

"Hell yes!" Rocco growled. "What the hell were you thinking? Were you trying to get yourself kidnapped as revenge for my taking your door?"

I shook my head, but I didn't reply. Rocco taking my door was part of why I had left, but it wasn't revenge I had sought. I had just wanted to go. Being kidnapped hadn't even occurred to me. Not until I was grabbed and taken.

"You knew that you would get taken if you left, Carrie. That's why you weren't going to school. It's why we're all at home instead of living our lives. You knew this!"

Rocco sounded more upset than I'd ever heard him. He sounded furious, but he also sounded sad. Defeated. Broken.

I'd broken my brother.

"You took my door!" I yelled at him, the emotions of the day suddenly welling up inside me and spilling out, overwhelming me.

Anger. Upset. Sadness. Fear.

It was all too much.

"Because you wouldn't stop slamming the fucking thing!" Rocco snarled back. "Why the hell would you decide to get yourself kidnapped as revenge? What would you have done if we hadn't got to you in time? They might have killed you, Carrie. Is that what you want? To be dead? Is life with us really so bad that you want to die?"

Rocco's voice didn't sound like him. Not at all. He sounded weird.

I looked at the pavement where we stood. I didn't want to look at my brothers. I didn't want to look at any of them.

Did I want to die? Is that why I had done this?

I was miserable. We were all stuck in the house, and I was doing school online. But aside from that, I was grounded and missed my friends, and my brothers had been ignoring me. And I had no door on my bedroom. But that didn't mean....

"Hell no I don't want to die!" I yelled, punching Rocco on the chest as hard as I could. "You're an asshole for taking my door, but I didn't mean for any of this to happen!" I screamed, punching him again.

Rocco caught my wrists and Jack wrapped his good arm around me, pulling me back.

He started striding quickly back towards home, dragging me along with him.

"How the hell was I to know-"

Nick's hand over my mouth cut off my yelling.

"Quiet. We're out on the street and you're making a spectacle of yourself," he hissed. He pulled me away from Jack and twisted, tossing me up and over his shoulder like I was a sack of potatoes or something, following along fast after Jack.

I shrieked, and started yelling at Rocco again, but Nick tightened his grip on my thighs, holding me firmly, and swatted my bottom hard.

"I told you to be quiet," he growled. "We're out on the street. Let's get you home and we will discuss this there."

He gave me five more spanks, in time with his quick steps, and the short but hard spanking, combined with shock and overflowing emotions, made me cry.

I gripped his shirt, pressing my face into his back, wanting to hide. Wanting this day to be over. Wanting my life to go back to normal.