Forever Now | Tom Kaulitz

Chapter 7

-Tom POV-

I couldn't erase the image of her lying on the floor, the white floor covered in her own blood.
I had woken up to her loud scream, it took a minute to register that she was the one who screamed. I got out of bed and I headed downstairs to check on her. I went into her room to see if she was alright, but she wasn't in her bed. Our dogs were whining like crazy. I look at the light shining under the bathroom door as I heard sobbing and uneven breathing. Then I saw It.

Blood was dripping out from under the door. Before I knew it I heard a slam onto the ground. I kept pounding on the door trying to break it open. I started slamming my whole body as I screamed bills name. I opened the door to see her lying on the floor surrounded by her own blood. Smeared across the white bathroom tiles. I drop to my knees bringing ella's unconscious body up to me, the blood getting on my white hoodie and light blue jeans.

Bill runs in the room and I can hear Heidi running down the stairs. "Bill call 9/11!" I yell at him. Heidi runs in the room seeing the scene unfold before her own eyes. She drops on her knees screaming. "Princess come back to mommy" she sobs.

The ambulance gets here as I check her pulse. Her pulse was gone. The EMTS come inside the bathroom and tell his to clear the way. Tears stream down my face. I hugged my wife as she watched the EMTS try to bring her daughter back to life. They shocked her, trying to bring her back desperately. "She has a pulse!" one of them screams.

They wheel her out of the room and wheel her outside. I watch her eyes flutter open as heidi talked to her, tears streaming down her face. "Mommy" Ella cries. Bill and I get closer to them.
Ella goes unconscious again, but then she starts seizing. Heidi breaks down again as Bill hugs me. I stared at ella as the EMTS try to stabilize her.

Ella stops seizing. I turn around to go back inside and I hear her scream again. I turn back around watching her go completely limp.

I walk over to Ella and I's dogs. Going up to her bed and crying as I held Capper and Kiva. Bill comes over to me and hugs me. I sob harder than I ever had. If only she had told us sooner we could've helped her. Maybe she wouldn't have tried to kill herself.

I know the feeling Ella was having. I remember wanting to jump that day, but thankfully Bill noticed my change in behavior. From that day forward I promised I would never leave Bill.
Ella had succeeded at killing herself. I mean, kinda. She did die.
I don't know why she would want to leave our kids like that.

Watching her die in front of me made me realize how much I actually cared for her. Not as my wife's daughter but as a person.

I cried into my brother as I held Ella and I's puppies. It's almost if Capper and Kiva could understand that their mom was gone. They were whining like crazy, they knew what happened.
I looked down at myself, covered in her blood.
"Bill, I have to be with her" I say.