Lacing the Lost Stars

Thirty Nine

---

Kiro

There were many instances in life where I felt entirely satisfied with myself, after completing a task for Kai without harming an innocent, or even being able to help someone just in the fucking nick of time.

But neither of those instances amounted to the satisfaction of Aviana Reath laying on me, her head just under my arms whilst it rested on my chest which rose far too often whenever she was around. I bet she was smiling in her sleep knowing she had this effect on me.

It almost felt like nothing else mattered when she was near me, hell even knowing she was close by somewhere was enough to give me peace. My response to her scared me beyond belief, I had tried so damn hard not to give in to her at the start, all I knew now was how difficult our situation had become presently.

She only knew me through stained glass, there was only a small amount of light left needed to filter past me for her to find out everything. The true colours of my past, who I really was.

She wouldn't like it, I was sure of it.

Seeing her expression when I had attacked her father did something to me, something clicked and I just needed to hold her and promise to never harm someone again, even for a good reason as that fucker deserved so much more.

What made me feel worse was knowing there was more to me than she knew, more pain I had caused other people, she was an empath and could never look at me the same after registering the actions I had done to others.

Killing those who deserved death more than anything didn't faze me as much as it would other people.

But taking an innocent life left a scar on you which would become sore again after hurting another person, the scar on me seemed to have split open. It had been years since that one incident and it still haunted me to this day, I would have to tell her eventually.

My past wasn't something I was proud of and if I could, I would reverse time just to go back and do things differently for her to view me with more purity.

To not think less than of me.

Although my present was hardly any different to my past, reversing time simply wouldn't be enough for her to accept my sins, she deserved more.

As I became immersed in my mind, a strong vibration came from beside us, I turned over to the small table next to the hospital bed where Aviana's phone was rattling.

Along with the noise, she shifted underneath me scrunching her nose as she nuzzled further against me.

Don't get hard, don't get hard.

Fuck that, I probably was by now.

"Av, your phone," I whispered lowly yet she seemed completely unconscious.

After what had happened to her earlier this morning, it felt wrong to wake her since she had been awake with me for the entire day, god I didn't deserve her in the slightest. I reached over to her phone, turning it over to see who was calling her.

An unknown number?

My eyebrows furrowed, who the fuck was calling her on a private number, it felt like an invasion of privacy to stay on her phone yet as fast as I had read the name, as fast as it had turned off before I could answer.