Dream Of You (Jensoo)

Accismus

Defined as: feigning disinterest in something while actually desiring it.

••••••••••

"You want to do what?"

"I want to join the competition as a soloist."

"It's in less than a month Jennie," James explains gently. "When would you—"

"I can handle the choreography and music and costume—just sign me up."

James rakes a hand through his hair. "Jennie.... I'll try okay? I can't confirm anything but I will try."

I smile widely. "Thank you!"

He nods with a lingering gaze and says, "I do appreciate your passion for this sport. And if you need anything else, please call me."

I nod. "Thank you but I don't think I need anymore help."

I turn around and go out the door.

The dream shifts.

I'm in the green room putting final touches to my make up when I hear a knock the door.

"Come in!" I say and open the foundation.

"Jennie."

I turn around and see Inna standing there. She has on a frustrated expression.

I grin. "Coach Inna! What a pleasant surprise! I was hoping to say hi!"

She stares at me with a hard look. "Why are you so determined? You're not even doing this because you like skating! You're doing this to prove me wrong!"

I shake my head. "That's where you're wrong. I love figure skating. Everything comes naturally to me. I didn't need years of experience to do what your skaters are doing. I only needed one. I went from practicing once a week to steadily practicing 2 or 3 hours a day! It is my passion! It is what keeps me going everyday! And I'm not going to have someone like you—with prejudices and standards—stop me from doing what I love to do!" I raise an eyebrow. "Proving you wrong is just a side bonus."

She sneers and then leaves with a loud slam of the door.

I feel my heart racing and I press a hand over it, taking deep breaths.

I can do this.

I can do this.

The dream shifts.

James smiles brightly on the ice at the figure skating group. "Please welcome Jennie Kim! She will be an addition to Team Winter from now on!"

They all clap as I skate on the ice with a big smile and stand next to Lily. She grins at me and I laugh and look forward.

Coach Inna stared at me. "As much as I tried to stop you.....you were determined, hardworking and driven. You earned first place in the solo competition all by yourself. I underestimated you."

I clear my throat. "I'm sorry I didn't hear that."

I hear snickering as the girls cover their mouths.