Music fills my ear with a sense of sadness. While I ponder if I should leave the world and the people in it.
Drinking my coffee. Trying to find peace and motivation. But I can only find the lack of self worth and determination.
I have died before. Rescued and came back. I had beat the dying of nature. But what's the point of me coming back.
Looking at God's creation. I see death is not the answer. But escaping to another world is a increased verse of finding what I am. Leaving behind the past, the pain, and the ghost of what I once was. To start a new in a land of romance and visitation.
I can only see it in movies. Like salt and Revenge. Creating new lives just to solve the crime. Or the coma of a person that goes on from time to time. It could be me. I want it to be. But I wouldn't be able to leave my Arises, Aquarius, and my dad behind.
I know the dangers of a nursing home. It will kill my father. Just give it time. It's why I am his caregiver until it's his time. To lavish and breathe. To know the man who has wanted me but couldn't see me due to the pain of the heart of my mother. It's him while I am still alive.
O death how I use to seek thee.
Taking the knives and the lighters to ruin my skin. But somehow had find peace within. O acholic drinks, thou has numb me. But these emotions makes me feel like I can believe. But it hurts beyond your own degrees.
So I will hide and never look back.
I have rescued me time and time again.
Sure the advice and the fight of the villagers helped. But it is I who had to make the final decision. Atlas I did Atlantis. But now thou sister is calling me.
To end what is left of me.
For the many battles was won. But now I'm facing the war. I'm wounded and broken. Battered and scarred.
I am on a limp while my sword is my cane. Blood and sweat on my face. O it is all in vein.
I'm indeed a dragon.
I'm indeed an alpha wolf.
I love like the swan in my ponds.
But I will surrender in this war and become a legend who died before it was her time.
So sipping my coffee. Fatigue it brings. I don't feel good Atlantis. Is it poison in my cream. Ironically I had met my fate. Poison my dreams to a certain degree. By trying to walk. But am now back with crawling like the baby that babbles because they are trying to reach their gain.
I thought I was stronger than triton. Braver than any lion.
But I am lamb who only has dreams.
Escape or death.
What path will lead
