Advice For The Christian Girl

The Right Man

Relationships are a part of life. God is the one who created relationships. Friends, family, and community are precious. Yet there is something special about a romantic relationship that a simple friendship can't compare to.

Marriage shows the relationship between Christianity and the church. Only marriage has that close mirror. I once heard that marriage is the closest relationship you can get with someone that resembles your relationship with God.

That's why choosing who you marry one day is important. We don't just jump into relationships or follow any good-looking guy.

But this makes things challenging our feelings are very deceptive (Jeremiah 17:9), fall for the wrong person, and your whole destiny can be hindered.

An example is Samson. Samson might have fallen for Dinah's looks and charm but she most definitely was not the woman God had in mind for him. Solomon was known for marrying many foreign wives and because of that, it turned his heart away from God.

The reason why I pointed out that a romantic relationship is the closest to God is because it will influence you the most.

After God, this human being will see all your flaws, they'll know you better than anyone else, and they'll see your good days and your WORST days. There's no hiding in marriage. You know those times when you aren't feeling your best, those days when perhaps you got irritated. Nothing, to a degree, will be hidden from your future spouse.

They'll see a lot and if this isn't someone that God led you to you'll have more years of heartbreak and regret. Marrying someone isn't just an engagement. It combines two destinies. As women, we need the right kind of person to lead us well and point us to Christ.

1) Christian

His nice? His kind? But if he isn't Christian don't get your hopes up. There are cases where at times someone was married to someone and they became saved and their spouse didn't. That's okay since they were already married when they weren't believers.

But as Christians, we shouldn't have the aim to convert someone while pursuing them. It's dangerous. Why?

1. You'll easily gain that 'I can change him mindset'

You can't change anyone. The Bible encourages women who are already married to unbelievers that they can change but it never says if we willingly choose to marry an unbelievable they'll change (1 Peter 3:1).

2. You'll have a different vision

What will you teach your kids? Perhaps you'll want to go pray before you decide to move to Australia. What happens if your husband doesn't like that? What happens if he ignores every direction God gives you?

It can lead to constant division and conflict. Maybe not in the beginning but eventually your different views will cause bitterness. You'll envy those couples who pray together. You'll wish your husband and you both could Bible study. You'll feel the weight of being the only person in your family who fasts and seeks God

Your kids will be in confusion. Do you follow mom or dad? You'll constantly contradict each other affecting your family.

Mom says God is real. Dad says He isn't. It can cause so much confusion and issues in your future family's lives.

3. You'll be a babysitter

Now this is an interesting point. Trust me I've been there but understand that even if said person converts, they won't be on a similar level as you. You won't be working well. You'll be way more spiritually mature than them.

When you are already baptized, can pray, and have overcome long temptations they'll still be navigating that route. You'll be eating different meat (1 Corinthians 3). The Bible shows how there is milk and meat. They'll still be struggling to hear God and discern His will and it can slow down. It will be an issue for the man to live out God's will for Him to submit to Him first (more on that later).