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★ { Ananas } Lost in 30 Days

Client: Diverselyunique

Reviewer: rebecca_batteur

Title:

I find the title very well thought out and very intelligent. Indeed, it can be interpreted in various ways. First, the relationship between the two main characters will be over within thirty days, or, second, they are destined to get lost and not see time pass during these thirty days. I think both interpretations are interesting, given that one suggests a rather tragic outcome to their relationship while the second suggests that they can still find a way to find each other. All hope has not yet disappeared. In addition, the title is very evocative of the subject of the story and that is a good thing in my opinion, it reminds us of what is going to happen.

Cover:

The cover is very pretty but also very evocative and allows us to get a good overall idea using the title of the subject the story will treat. The title font is easy to read and works well for a light, romantic story like this and the symbolism of the photograph being torn in two fits the book perfectly. We have the idea of ​​a separation and also the possibility that this separation is not permanent, since a hand holds the two pieces and seems to want to either bring them together or push them even further apart, as if the decision was not still taken. The break is very clear, one might think that it is not yet impossible to save the couple.

Blurb:

There are a few mistakes in your summary. First, in the first sentence, you should put "like I was the worst thing ever". Then, in the second sentence, there is an error in the verb, "approaches" is the correct way to write it. There is also an error in the commas just after, in the spelling of a word, and in the concordance of tenses, "but what he doesn't know is a lot is about to happen". The summary works, I don't think I have much to complain about, it is clear, concise, precise, and gives a good image of the rest of the story as well as the complicated relationship that now unites two previously close characters. I love the quote at the beginning, it works very well. I could perhaps ask for more details about Ilana's motivation but that's not necessary either, it's almost optional. I think the summary is fine in this way, but developing it further is not to be ruled out, using questions "What will become of their relationship?" "Will they succeed in putting the pieces together?", it's an option, that's all, perhaps to reinforce a little the incentive function of the summary.

Plot:

I don't know if there's a plot to speak of, given that this is a primary love story, not so much centering on a series of actions, mysteries, or unexpected twists. I don't mean that the story is predictable or that it doesn't have a narrative thread, but rather that that's not what it focuses on. The only questions one might have is about whether or not the two characters will come back together, and this isn't so much plot concerns but more character concerns, so I think I'll move on to them immediately.

Characters:

Michale:

I should point out that I'm not sure of the spelling of his first name, since he's called Michale most of the time, except for a few rare times when his name is spelled Michael.

I don't know what to think about him, other than that he's a particularly unsympathetic character to me. I suspect this is somewhat the principle, however, there are still limits to the way you can treat someone. At the beginning of the story, we quickly learn that he and Ilana have been separated for some time and that they have no or almost no contact with each other, except for the rare times when Michale shows up at home unannounced to eat with his daughter, without first warning his wife, who is forced to give him her share of the meal so that he can spend some time with Ira. This already gives you the setting. Michale doesn't seem very attentive to the needs of his family and is even rather rude to his wife even though we haven't even met him. He doesn't bother to tell her when he'll come, which prevents her from making any plans since he could arrive at any time. Then, I don't know exactly what job Ilana does but I hope that this job pays well so that she continues to take care of her house and her daughter alone since her husband doesn't seem to, or it's not mentioned, provide her with the slightest financial support. He takes very little care of his daughter and lets his wife take care of everything while he is with another woman and very openly.