In the Shadows - Sebastian Sallow x reader (English)

Chapter 44

Adult content ahead

"And how did you feel about it?" asked Doctor Walker a few weeks later on a Friday afternoon, looking at me expectantly over the rim of her half-moon glasses. Nurse Blainey had contacted her old school friend because she specialized in psychology. "Doctor Walker can help you much better than I ever could," she had explained after our first conversation and, after I agreed, sent a hasty owl to London. Doctor Walker worked in the Ministry of Magic to help Aurors and relatives deal with trauma. And now she also came to Hogwarts once a week and helped me process my experiences. Not only the damage Leander had caused but also the scars that my cousin Emily and my first year at Hogwarts had left on my soul. "Proud," I answered Doctor Walker's question. "And somehow free." We were talking about my small successes. At first, I was uncomfortable talking about my love life with a complete stranger, but I quickly realized that it took up a large part of my therapy time. Many of my wounds affected my relationship with Sebastian and with my body. I had told Doctor Walker about the previous weekend. Sebastian and I had celebrated Gryffindor's victory against Hufflepuff with a wild make-out session. A make-out session that ended with me sitting naked on his lap and rubbing myself against his erection. We were so close to merging, but something inside me hadn't been ready. However, I now felt comfortable enough to sleep next to my boyfriend in skimpy clothes and not immediately panic when he held me close and touched my breasts accidentally - or perhaps on purpose. "That's very nice to hear. I'm happy about your progress, and you can be proud of every step you take. No matter how small it is." "Thank you," I breathed. "That's nothing you have to thank me for. Thank yourself." She gave me an encouraging smile. "And remember: there is no shame in a setback." I nodded and kneaded my little finger. The last grains of sand from the large hourglass that Doctor Walker brought with her every hour trickled through the hole in the middle into the lower half, announcing the end of our session. Doctor Walker put her pen and writing pad in her bag, stood up and walked towards the fireplace in the small room provided for us. "I'll see you in a week. If there is anything urgent, send an owl." I nodded again and stood up, too. Green flames lit up the room for a brief moment as the doctor used the floo flames. I took a deep breath. The sessions helped me a lot, but they also took a lot of energy out of me. All I wanted to do was go to bed. Or at least snuggle up and hide away.

After a short walk through the castle, I collapsed face-first into the soft pillows and inhaled the scent of cedar wood. Sebastian and I hadn't spent a night in our dorms. If anyone found out, we would get into a lot of trouble, but it was more than worth it if it ever came to that. I breathed a deep, loud sigh into the pillow and wrapped my arms around the soft thing. Just a moment later, I fell asleep.

"Y/N!" A strong hand shook my shoulder gently but firmly. "Wake up, mo ghràdh. You're going to sleep through dinner." Groaning, I pressed my face deeper into the pillow beneath me. A quiet laugh sounded next to me. I turned my head just enough to glare at Sebastian. He gently brushed the hair out of my face and smiled lovingly at me. "We both know that if you sleep the whole time now, you'll be starving to death and won't be able to sleep tonight." "I was just resting my eyes," I countered. "Sure," grinned Sebastian. "And snored like a troll." I gave him a nasty look. "A beautiful, petite troll. A troll princess," he tried to save himself. "Nice try." I sat up. "Does that make you my troll prince?" "If that's what you want," Sebastian replied with a crooked grin. "How was your conversation with Doctor Walker?" he asked. I sighed. "Tiring. As always. But I'm making progress." "That's very good. And I can see that. You're becoming more and more open towards me and more confident." Sebastian kissed me on the forehead. "How was your punishment?" I asked in return. Sebastian sighed theatrically. "Tiring. As always." I slammed the pillow into his face. "Idiot. Are you making any progress?" He shook his head. "I start over every day. It is as if new dirt is being sprinkled on the trophies every night. Although I trust Peeves to do that." I suppressed a laugh. "He really is capable of that." Sebastian's face twisted into a grim grimace. "Come on. I don't want you to starve." He held out his hand, which I took without hesitation. We strolled to the Great Hall together so that none of us would starve.