I Love You Because I Have To {UNDER EXTREME EDITING}

Chapter 4

HEYYYYY! Sooo I sadly, won't be uploading as fast or as often anymore, cause I keep getting in trouble and getting my laptop taken away because I keep reading my fav stories for days on end  without moving... Anyways... Hope you like the update. Sorry it will be a little longer/shorter than normal mostly cause a lot is going on and a new character is introduced! Anyways... byesies! mes fluffy wuffly chocolatety cookies! <3

     I woke up and instantly my head roared to life with pain. I groaned and looked at the bed I was laying on. It was John's, great. Just great. I thought. I hated John, I never wanted to be around him. I punched the pillow, thinking it was John's head, and believing that it was until I heard someone mutter,

"This is him? He doesn't seem as weak as you mentioned." I turned around sharply. The voice wasn't John's. It belonged to a rather random green haired stranger.

"Who are you?" I muttered weakly. (My head had started throbbing again.) The man just walked over to me handed me pills and a glass of water and uttered one word, Drink. He sat there watching me for a little while and then stood up and left. I pushed the pills onto the floor, and decided against drinking the water too. Whoever that guy was, could've drugged it. I wanted to leave now, more than ever. I got up and started tip toeing to the front door.

"AND JUST WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU'RE GOING?" John snarled. I looked back at him and ran to the door grabbing the knob and trying to open it. He grabbed my waist and held me against him. I scratched at his face and bit him. I wanted to get away, I just had to get away. He threw me off of him and kicked me hard in my stomach. I groaned. He kept kicking me. I just wanted it to end.

"Please be over.." I begged myself. Then the kicking abruptly stopped. He bent down to ear level with me. "Please John, no more.." I whimpered.

"Look here whore, Henry, Stephanie, Jill, and me are going to fuck you, and you are going to like it, in fact, you're gonna beg for more like the little slut you are, got it?!?" I closed my eyes trying to get the tears not to fall. I didn't want him to know I was afraid. My eyes betrayed me, my tears fell down my cheeks and a sob racked through my body. "Awww, my poor little whore.." He scooped me into his arms. "Look at me." I obeyed.

"Do you love me?" I whispered. "Now think for a moment, do you think a guy like me, or any guy would or could ever be interested in a weak, ugly, slutty, whorey, bitch like you?" I shook my head sadly and let the tears fall. "I'm doing you a favor, by fucking you, no one else will ever give a damn about you, nobody. If you ever think of leaving me no one else will treat you as good as I do. No one will love you. Do you want that?" I shooked my head feeling defeated.

   "Good, now come to the bedroom and fufill your whorely duties." He grabbed my hand and dragged me behind him as the other people followed. He threw me onto the bed and everyone immediately started peeling off their clothes. Within a few moments, everyone was naked. That is, everyone except me. John started taking off my clothes first, moments later everyone else was joining in. I just let them. John was right, it was foolish of me thinking that Ash would like me, or anyone else for that matter. I let them have their way with me, crying my eyes out like the whore they had made me out to be. 

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     Ash~

                 I was still laying on the floor when I woke up. My dad was passed out on the couch. I slowly started to get up then, out of pain, fell back down. My ribs were cracked again. This wouldn't be the last time, and this definately wasn't the first. I knew I had to get out of my house, because when my dad woke up, I'd be his punching bag.

The thought of seeing Jason again made me smile. I'd promised him I'd see him today. I walked into the snow and nearly fell over. I walked over to Jason's house and knocked on his door. When nobody answered I rang the doorbell. I kept knocking. I knew someone had to be there. Just then the door opened and I saw his mother with nothing but her underwear on and a t-shirt. I was shocked at first, but then asked her where Jason was. She told me he wasn't here. I got worried. I heard someone shout from up stairs, "LINDA! BRING YO SEXY ASS BACK HERE! TELL WHOEVER IS AT THE DOOR TO FUCK OFF!" She blushed crazily and turned back towards me.

"Isn't your other son home? Maybe he knows where Jason is?" She blushed again and bent down to whisper something in my ear. I was a little shocked. Never expected her to tell me that... I just waved at her and said goodbye. I had to find my Jason, I was afraid the guy from a few days ago had found him, beat him up, and left him to die in a pit or something.  I started walking on the sidewalk. I was going to keep going until I found him. I called his name out every so often. I kept walking and walked smack dab into Carly. She was the last person I'd insisted on seeing. I groaned and tried to walk away. She threw a rock at me and shouted,

"Hey, Looking for your boyfriend? I know what happened to him!" I looked her way thankfully and started walking toward her. She just smiled and giggled.

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Jason~

         I looked up at the ceiling everyone was asleep on the bed. I slowly made my way over and around the naked people. I went to the bathroom. I had been wipped with a rider's crop earlier and my chest and back were covered in marks, marks  that I was sure were going to scar. I sighed heavily and thought about leaving. I looked toward the door longingly.

I looked back at John, and remembered what he had said to me. I knew better than to even think about trying to go to Ash. I was foolish for even thinking for a second that I could have him and that he would love me. Ash would never love me, not ever, not even in a million years. No one would. I was unloveable. I would rather be abused and tormented by John, than to be alone for the rest of my life. I thought of when I had first met John. My father had just died a month before, from bone cancer. My mother was crying and emotional and drank and swore alot.

   She had been fired from her job and my brother had been the only one working at the time to bring home money. I had been in the closet gay since I was 9. I wanted to tell my family, but I knew they wouldn't approve, they would never approve.. I had met John while I was walking home from school. Some bullies who had figured out my "dirty little secret" decided it would be fun to beat me up. They started hitting me and kicking me. I felt like I was going to die, I had been beaten within an inch of life. I heard punches and kicks land, and surprisingly they weren't on me.

I saw John punching them and I saw the guys run. John had helped me and taken care of me. It wasn't soon after that he was confessing his love to me, that we had started dating. He wanted me to come out to my family, but I was still scared. He made me do it and promised he would be with me. I went home and told my family. It was worse than I imagined they disowned me as brother and son and kicked me out. It was then that I went to live with John. His Dad hated him so we decided to move out together and get our own place. It was a few weeks after that, when I noticed he had started to change. He was mad, more often than he'd admit.

He kept telling me he hated me and once, when I hadn't given him sex he'd beaten me and raped me. It was then that I wanted to leave, but he would always bring me back with sweet words and empty and unfufilled  promises. A year later, here we were. I was 17 he was 20 and he was abusing me more often than not and he was raping me almost everyday and forcing me into things, I didn't want to be in. I sighed. It was useless to bring up the past. It could never help you. I learned that the hard way.

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    Sooo Poor Jason right? What do you think his mom whispered in Ash's ear? Hehehe secret only mes know! Maybe you'll figure it out... This chapter was one of my shortest ones. I know I said it would contain alot more, but I decided to cut it and save it all for the next one. Mostly cause I got something planned.. Anyways sorry bout that... Btw what do you think of Carly? Do  you think she is gonna turn out to be good or bad? Btw COFFE AND CIGARRETTES BY NEVERSHOUTNEVER! ITS THE BEST SONG IN THE WORLD O_O