I Love You Because I Have To {UNDER EXTREME EDITING}

Chapter 6

First off, Let me just say, I'm thinking of deleting this story and starting over and if I don't I will finish this one and re write it then delete this one. I dunno why i think i should I just do. If Anyone doesn't want me to delete this story can u like comment or message me, so I know. Cause, I feel like I should. Kkz thats all...

    John (HEHEHE UNEXPECTED!) ~

        He's gone.. I can't believe he is fucking gone. My whore, my Jason. I haven't always thought of him this way though. I remember when I fell in love with him. I remember it all, so well. My father had made me rape a girl and he had killed her. I watched in horror while she screamed. Blood.. Soo much blood. My father was a murderer. A killer. I would forever be afraid of him. He grinned at me and I ran. I hated being around him when he was like that. I stopped in another alley, breathing heavily. That's the first time I saw Jason. He was being punched and kicked repeatedly. I felt a need to protect him. I rushed out of my hiding spot and attacked the men surrounding him. They ran. I helped him up. A few days later  I felt like he was all I had. I felt like if I lost him, I'd kill myself to be with him. I was truly in love with him. He told his family a little while after. They disowned him. I took him to my home, with my father. My father and I had a heated argument over Jason. Soon after, I had taken Jason in my car and we were going to find an apartment. My feelings toward him never really changed. I love him, Always have, Always will.

   A week after we moved into the apartment my father called me. He threatened to kill Jason. I became angry. Very angry. I changed toward Jason. I couldn't hit my father, but I could hit Jason. He was soo weak, soo frail. I hit him and he fell to the floor crying and screaming in pain. I loved the sound. I wanted to hear more of it. I started beating and hurting him more. I couldn't get enough of it. After a while, it got carried away. I wanted to change. I wanted to be with him again. I would give anything for it. I sighed. I went to the bathroom and got my rusty razor blade. It had been many years since I cut. I wasn't a hormonal  teenager anymore, begging for his daddy's approval. I knew I wouldn't get it and I didn't care. I just wanted to cut. It had been too long. A way out. A chance for me to escape. I cut myself repeatedly. It felt soo good. I smiled to myself and closed the door. My wrist was still bleeding, but I didn't care. I wanted to bleed out. I smiled again and walked down the stairs.

                                                                    *****

  Jason~

        I felt so giddy. I wanted to jump on the couch and start dancing! I started shaking my butt and singing into my hair brush. One way or another, I'm gonna find ya , Im gonna trick ya trick ya trick ya...--what can I say I love blondie?-- I kept singing until I heard the door creak open. I stopped bouncing. There was a girl with brown hair and light brown eyes staring back at me. She fell to the floor laughing. My face turned a beet red.

"So.. Nice tushy." She started giggling again. I blushed a darker shade of red.

"I was just.. ummmmmm cleaning his bed?" I replied awkwardly.

"Yeah, and I sing Blondie songs into a hair brush while I clean too.." She rolled her eyes.

I was caught.. "Yeah, You have to be pretty awesome to sing Blondie while you clean."

She looked at me and got on the bed with me. She grabbed the stereo remote from me and turned on the music. She grabbed they hairbrush and started bouncing. "One wayy orr anotherrrrrr..."

I laughed at her and started bouncing with her. I held up my imaginary microphone since she took the hairbrush. Damn you girl! I started singing too. "Im gonna meet ya. I'll meet ya!"

When the song was over we collapsed on his bed laughing. The door opened. We both looked toward the door in shock. It was Ash

"I swear, I didn't see you guys jumping on my bed and singing to Blondie..." I threw a pillow at him. 

"You did too! Lier!" I stuck my tongue out at him. Brittany, the girl who was jumping with me, grabbed it and pinched it between her thumb and pointer finger. I yelped and tried to pull my tongue back into my mouth. She wasn't letting go. "Aswhh" I tried. She giggled and Ash smiled.

She let my tongue go. I pulled it into my mouth and clamped my hands over my mouth. "No one is getting that again!" They both roared with laughter after that. I glared at Brittany and Ash and started walking to the door. The door opened again and hit me in my nose.  

"OH MY FRICKIN' RANIBOW FLUFF!" I screamed while cluching my nose.  It was a small little girl, she looked about six, with white colored hair and really pretty pink eyes. Albino, that's what she was. She smiled at me showing me her two missing teeth. "Hi there." I started.

"Wello mwy name is PwimRose." She smiled at me again. "You mean PrimRose." Brittany said. Brittany got off the bed and walked toward the little girl. 

"Swissy mommy say u have ta go home now." Brittany picked up PrimRose and the little girl latching onto her neck. "I gotta go guys, see ya later." She turned and ran out of the door. I clutched my nose. Ash walked toward me and wrapped his arms around my waist. I squealed. He pulled me to him and I sat on his lap. He kissed my neck and hugged me tighter. I remembered I had a question to ask him. I took a deep breath. "Ashy.."

"Yes?"

"Flame's sister came today and punched me and said you didn't keep a promise to her and Flame. What happened? And what's wrong with Flame?" 

He looked at me and slowly took a deep breath and blew it all out. 'Flame and I used to date."

My eyes swelled with tears and I struggled to comprehend all of that. So little words, but they had alot to take in with them. 

Don't cry please.

Not infront of him.

I failed myself, tears leaked through the corners of my eyes.

Damn my weakness.

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I think I like that format better, so I'm going to change everything I've written to that format, it's soo much better! Anyways I know no one reads this so yup bye!